To get this driver fired?

[TinyPigeon]

DAILY MAIL AND SUN ARE FACIST SCUM

Help me think this through.

I had an Argos delivery this morning which came early while I was still in bed. I stuck my head out of the window and asked the driver to just leave it on the step and I would get it in in a bit. I thought he would leave it and drive away as others have.

I brought the baby downstairs and settled her and then went to bring the parcel in, so a couple of minutes later. I opened the door and the driver was still there. I apologised because I didn't realise he'd be waiting for me. But also cringed because I was still in my nightshirt and had been feeding Dd so it was fairly unbuttoned.

Obviously Id thought he was gone and was just grabbing parcels off my step so wasn't super bothered about dignity.

However I just got a text from a private number saying "Hi thank you for putting a big smile on my face for the rest of the day your a beautiful woman xx".

I'm really grossed out. There's noone else it could be. I'm freaking that this man knows where I live and annoyed that he has saved my number. What should I do? I don't want to lose someone their livelihood. I'd told DH how friendly he was

Can I complain? Should I?

[BlueBrian]

Oh just forget about it, complain if he tries contacting you again, otherwise just move on, chances are, you'll never hear from him again.

[Mamamamycorona]

That's really unpleasant. I'd screenshot the text and send it in an email to Argos, saying you would be disgusted if that came from their driver. I'm sure they have means to check if the number matches an employee.

I had a Tesco food shop and the driver kept commenting how big a shop it was, and kept asking if I was alone and how often do I shop if it's just me and the baby (who was sleeping, there were nappies in the shoping). Creeped me right out. Thankfully DH'S size 13 trainers were in the doorway and I just said it's much easier to sort it myself as DH doesn't sort the fridge from cupboard.

[Fairenuff]

Why are so many women too timid to complain.

If I used data like that in my job I would be fired. Everyone knows that. If it was him, he knows the risk he is taking and he is banking on women being more concerned about his feelings than their own.

[JoJoHasIt]

I don’t know why she should think of the implications. She’s do e nothing wrong. It’s the sender of the text that should be thinking of any implications.

[TERFWars]

I would play dull first of all just to make sure - i’d reply and say ‘well thank you but who is this?’. THEN report the fucker when he confirms. If he was happy to send the first message there’s no way he’ll resist replying to you again.

But I would feel very uncomfortable reporting until I knew for sure it was him...coincidences can and do happen and on the very, VERY slim chance it wasn’t actually him I would check first - I wouldn’t take the risk of potentially imploding someone’s life unless I was certain.

[Ohtherewearethen]

If you're a card carrying feminist why aren't you giving him what for yourself? Your title sounds really cringy, 'AIBU to get this driver fired'. Rather than, AIBU to give this guy hell or report him to his manager. The fact is that you don't know who it was who sent you the creepy text. You'd have to have some proof first before going to Argos, surely?

[maddiemookins16mum]

At first I thought this was going to be a pissed off driver complaining that he didn’t have all day to wait for you to come to the door.

BUT, that text is awful. I’m never one for jumping on a ‘let’s get this person fired thread’, but it needs reporting.

Do it calmly, factually and in writing -take screen shots etc. Don’t phone as the likelihood the person answering will not really know what to say/do.

[Casmama]

On the basis that he knows where you live and from what you have said you either don't know the number it is from or have proof that it is from him, I would not report.
I would reply saying that you don't know who this is but that it is a very unwelcome and inappropriate text

[Jux]

It's not your responsibility to police how he does his job, that's Argos' responsibility.

It is your responsibility to report inapproriate and unprofessional (criminal? data breach) to his employer.

Do you have the number from which he sent it?

[Yankathebear]

Not from private numbers.

[IzzyGee]

As someone who has spent the last 3 months trying to persuade the pyjama-ed to come downstairs and open the front door (20 seconds max surely?)............he’s a creep and an idiot........but do the posties&couriers a favour and just answer the door. There are no prizes for leaving items on doorsteps.

[Yankathebear]

I would at least try to find out who it is first. If it 100% is the driver then definitely let his employer know.

[OldeMagick]

Creepy and unprofessional. I'd definitely report him.

I had something similar with a taxi driver. Had been using the same firm for years and never had a problem. Used them one evening and the driver seemed friendly enough but nothing dodgy. About 30 minutes after he'd dropped me off, I got a call from him asking if he could come round to mine. I was furious and shouted at him.

I immediately called the company and they were actually horrified - I even had a call from the manager the next morning. The driver actually had the nerve to call me again and send me text messages!

As far as I know they got rid of him because I've not seen him again.

What gives these men the right to behave like this!? The entitlement is off the scale.

[CorianderLord]

That's fucking hideous. I'd fee harassed if that was the case absolutely report him. That's vile.

[SomeDyke]

Who would have thought, after so many years of feminist struggle, that the 'be nice, maybe he didn't really mean it, maybe it wasn't him, maybe if you warn him he'll think again and not do it again' line was still going to be so strong..........

And the flipside, which seems to think being a feminist means you have to get all tough and sort it out yourself.......

Yes, to the latter before there was appropriate legislation or practises in place -- but there are such things in place, because of feminists, so we should use them.

And not feel guilty about having boundaries and enforcing them. We still have a long way to go it seems............

[RedToothBrush]

It's completely inappropriate but please think of the implications before reporting.

Its not the OP's responsibility what happens to the driver.

Its actually
a) the consequences of the drivers actions; its his own responsibility
b) the responsibility of the company he works for.

Women are not to blame for the inappropriate behaviour of men and how that makes them feel uncomfortable and unsafe.

The OP does not have the power to 'get someone sacked' anyway.

Please report behaviour like this, as its the only way it will stop.

[calmcoolandcollected]

I wouldn’t report him. I would text him back telling him his text is inappropriate, you assumed he was hone when you opened your door, he shouldn’t be texting you, and another female customer could report him to his employer for such a text.

[JeanMichelBisquiat]

Creepy - I'd report, if only to make sure it protects other vulnerable customers.

I had this several times from a delivery driver, but didn't twig on - I thought the random texts of praise were just a wrong number. It was only on the third occasion that I realised it happened each time after a delivery (he didn't refer to the deliveries in the texts). I was planning to report if it ever happened again, but he seemed to have stopped - suspect someone else reported him.

[bruffin]

@Polyxena

What is it with people adding these media disclaimers to their posts? You do realise that it has zero effect, right?

Yes , they omit that that bit,poster just makes herself look ignorant and will probably draw more attention from the papers

[Jaxhog]

They never miss an opportunity.

No. The vast majority of delivery drivers are civilized human beings. This guy was not. Of course the Op should report him. This is creepy and borderline stalking.

[SurreyHillsGirl]

Oh don’t get him sacked FFS

Just delete the text. You really do not have to ruin his bloody life over a daft text message

[Lockdownseperation]

Report the behaviour. If he gets fired that’s not your responsibility.

[BlueBrian]

Yeah go ahead and report him, the company will just make sympathetic noises and then completely forget about your complaint, go on waste the money on a phone call if it makes you feel better.

[sownahsk]

Why wouldn't you report it? It's wrong on so many levels.

[user187428496]

Women are not to blame for the inappropriate behaviour of men and how that makes them feel uncomfortable and unsafe.

Yes. This thread is depressing.

Please report behaviour like this, as its the only way it will stop.

Agreed.

You know nothing about this man and what he is capable of. Report it.