Hi op,
I would highly recommend this book:
Fair Share: How the divorce courts in England & Wales deal with your money Author David Chidgey,
I suggested using free sessions at solicitors, presuming as a SAHM with a husband saying what he has that you don’t have lots of money to spend on solicitors, otherwise I guess you would already have gone to one.
Obviously if you have lots of spare funds then get a solicitor of your choice engaged ASAP but this isn’t usually an option for most.
I’m going through a divorce, a messy financial divorce and had been a SAHM for 11 yrs having given up a career. I didn’t have money for a solicitor and found the free sessions very useful.
I went to 4 in total as I wanted to confirm what I was being told and all had slightly different opinions as unfortunately financial divorce law is not clear cut. I am now using one of the 4 I tried for continual advice, they were also recommended by our mediator. I have had to get loans and credit cards to pay for this as the hourly rate is £300 which is the norm round here, so not to be taken likely. My likely total costs are going to be £20-£40k.
I would advice you to read the book first, write all key facts about your marriage and children, finances, earning, mortgage etc down and send it to the solicitor in advance of your introductory session, ( I found that solicitors need to write down all your details, names of all family, dates of birth, date of marriage , assets, mortgage, etc and this can take 30 mins and eats into your free or reduced rate session) two of my sessions were reduced rates, two were £5.
The main priority for the courts will be the children and them having somewhere suitable to live, you will not automatically have to sell the house but you may need to. As you were a SAHM and your mortgage is £950 I am assuming your husband is a reasonable earner.
The courts do prefer ‘clean break’ settlements and in your case this would not mean 50:50 as you are a SAHM and your husband is a higher earner and presumably has higher earning potential going forward, particularly if you are the main carer. The courts would expect you to return to work at some point but with a 2 yr old not necessarily straight away and probably only part time until the children are older. If you are to be the main carer then this would also be factored into the size of house you need versus your husnpbandsie) reasonable for you to need more space than your ex and so this together with his higher earning potential would mean that you would be likely to get a higher % of the equity when the house is sold, possibly between 60-70% or on rare occasions more. If you can’t downsize because your house is already small then it’s possible you coukd stay there until the children are older. It depends if you have savings your husband could use to help rehouse himself or if his earnings would also cover his rent without the need to sell. There is no one size fits all but you need to be aware of your options. I would definitely not rush into trying to get a job until you have sorted out the divorce and consider carefully whether you want to remain the main carer or ask for shared care to allow you to develop a career for yourself. The latter may be the best in financial terms in the long run but is it best for you and the children, what would happen if your husband remarries and has a second family as so often seems to be the case.
There is no size fits all and if you can’t afford a clean break settlement because you don’t have enough equity in your property to rehouse you both then you may also get spousal maintenance. I am receiving this.
You can also get an interim financial order (called a maintenance pending suit) until the finances are sorted but be warned it cost me £4000 in solicitors fees just to get this in place and my ex has ignored the court order to pay me more and now more fees to sue for contempt oppression court, the CMS are taking 12 weeks at the moment just to follow up a claims so it can be a long stressful process, depending on hoe reasonable your ex will be but definitely arm yourself with as much knowledge as possible.