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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be a bit upset by this gift?

244 replies

thisusernameismine · 02/07/2020 12:26

I've left my job after over ten years and my boss is giving me a £1k budget with an upmarket wine merchant as a leaving present. I stopped drinking in Jan but unfortunately have gone a bit back into it over lockdown - I am determined to get back on track especially as I'm now jobless and mum to a toddler! It was common knowledge I wasn't drinking anymore at the start of the year and I've mentioned more recently how bad it is for my head. I mentioned the wine merchant is upmarket as he only sells posh stuff which is wasted on me anyway!

Do I say I cannot use this gift?! I've spoken to the wine merchant (mutual contact) and he's absolutely fine to not take the budget.

Just don't know how to give the gift 'back' 😭

OP posts:
Sarah510 · 02/07/2020 22:17

throw a big party :)

Sunshineandmoonlight · 02/07/2020 22:41

If it's a posh wine merchant you should be able to buy a couple of bottles of Armand de Brignac and you won't have to store several bottles. Pretty sure they sell their set of three for about £1K, if you don't drink them then you can always gift them.

Heresto2020 · 02/07/2020 23:39

Totally understand, BUT, as you don’t need to have it in your house, and you know the merchant... could you ask him to select cases of wine for people you know & love...

I also said that OP should accept the gift and make use of it but she has said she does not want to gift alcohol because of how she feels about it

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 03/07/2020 03:40

It would be useful for a party though - or a small wedding reception.

Glad that the wine merchant is a friendly sort and so helpful, anyway - I'm sure you'll be able to work something out in terms of what to do with the stock.

sashh · 03/07/2020 04:15

Just the logistics of buying £1000 worth of wine and where you would put the stuff even if you were drinking it makes it an awkward present.

£1000 can easily be spent on 10 bottles.

OP

I'd treat it as an investment and do what others have said, have it stored for a few years then sell on.

neveradullmoment99 · 03/07/2020 07:33

You cannot not accept it. Its absolute cheek otherwise. Sorry. You need to make the best of it unfortunately. No matter which way you put it, its going to come across as ungrateful.

FruitTingleFrizzante · 03/07/2020 07:54

You could totally use it! You can very easily just purchase 1 or 3 bottles of higher value as investments. Wine is a very practical investment ( if stored well ). Not everyone buys its to neck on a Friday night.
It's incredibly easy to blow 1000 on wine and generally very easy to sell too.

Heytheredelilah99 · 03/07/2020 08:51

It would be nice to gift to family and friends or get togethers when that can happen. But I'm like you and 1k on wine seems a bit of a waste.....I'd rather have the money!!

Original poster
thisusernameismine · 03/07/2020 09:24

I have thanked the person and the wine merchant is going to invest for me :) thanks for all the help along the way!

OP posts:
CambsAlways · 03/07/2020 09:50

So very rude to give it back, goodness what did you do for a job that’s some leaving present! No good for me as I don’t drink, but I would be giving the drink away to friends as presents

Mn345678 · 03/07/2020 10:29

Hi I think £1 is an ok amount for a DECADE of your life - where I work they give it to people who have been there 7+ ... I dont see why people think its an obscene amount. Im sure its well deserved.
As a mum with a toddler im sure the cash or some other retail voucher would have been much more useful.... having to deal with buying and selling is a nuisance.

Definitely would contact my boss and Kindly say I've stopped drinking and only do so very occasionally, and if possible could you change the voucher to a retail store where you can shop for yourself and kids. That is not rude at all and Im sure they'd be more than happy. Its £1k coming out either way so why would they care whose till it goes to?!

Nofunkingworriesmate · 03/07/2020 10:43

My whip round after 9 years was £50 which I was super grateful for

Is the voucher bought?

randomer · 03/07/2020 11:01

Those poor people in Glasgow could do with a helping hand or Mind or the Samaritans must be under great pressure. How about , instead of wringing your hands about some stupidly expensive booze, you sell it and do something decent.

SmileyClare · 03/07/2020 11:02

I think £1 is an ok amount for a decade of your life hehe great typo Grin

randomer · 03/07/2020 11:02

" the wine merchant is going to invest it for me", ah well, crisis averted then.

TimeWastingButFun · 03/07/2020 11:56

Accept it graciously then every time you save money giving a nice bottle of wine as gifts to families and friends instead of something else at Christmas, etc, put the money you saved in an account, then spend that! They probably chose that gift as they have a very good discount with them or something, so asking for the cash equivalent isn't a very good idea...

dottiedodah · 03/07/2020 12:08

Some good ideas here! Just pass it on to friends /family .Maybe invest in a really good brandy ? and sell it on or keep for a few years as an investment!

Krong · 03/07/2020 12:49

Sounds like you've got a great solution OP.

I just had to comment @recededpronunciation that it's tee-total, not "tea-total", but I love the idea that you just drink 'totally tea'.

Cheeseandwin5 · 03/07/2020 12:55

I would fess up and see if your boss will change the £1k to something you will use.
I assume it will make no difference to him either way.
If he can't maybe see anyone who is having a wedding etc and see if you can supply the wine in exchange for cash

wheretonow123 · 03/07/2020 13:25

@thisusernameismine
The OP actually got a good offer of £800 from a poster here.

If money was tight at the moment for me that's what i would opt for.

MyWitzEnd · 03/07/2020 18:10

20 yrs and i got a bunch of flowers

Diva66 · 03/07/2020 18:32

Donate it to a charity auction.

IslandbreezeNZ · 03/07/2020 18:40

God, you must work for a Hedge Fund Manager!!

RoyEastmannKodak · 03/07/2020 18:41

A thousand pounds? As a leaving gift? A THOUSAND pounds?? I am unable to take on any other points relevant to the thread because I can’t even.....

mylifestory · 03/07/2020 18:53

EBay it!

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