So embarrassed by friends. AIBU to ask them to leave tomorrow morning?

[Rebecca980]

Our friends - a gay couple - who we have been close with for the last 15 years came over to stay. They have had one set of parents, a sister, her baby and their two dogs staying with them for two weeks whilst they wait to move into their new place. They needed a break so we said they could come and stay with us for a few days. They are in our ‘bubble’. We’ve both recently moved from London to the south coast close by - which was a decision we made together really.

DH and I have been friends with them for years. Before DD came along and we were married. We’ve had wild times - but we’ve all grown up....or so I thought.

They arrived with bottle of vodka in tow. It lasted them about an hour until they pulled out another and it went.

We have made friends with our neighbours since we Moved here and have made an active effort to try and integrate ourselves in our new area and street.

I am SO EMBARRASSED by their behaviour this evening. It’s like they regressed to us being 20 again.

By the time DD went to bed, they were screaming in the garden, swearing (C word at the end of almost every sentence), trying to talk to neighbours over the fences. They also love ‘shock values - which was funny when we were kids but really isn’t now and they reverted straight back to it.

I’m embarrassed our neighbours have heard them and worried how it reflects on us. I’m sure they could also hear us trying to sort them out.

I’m also annoyed at DH a little as I was trying to get them inside but was getting no support in that.

Some of the things they were shouting have left me unable to sleep and worried about how it reflects.

They have hearts of gold, and DD adores themes Bhave always been terrible drunks. I don’t actually like being drunk so maybe this has been exasperated because I wasn’t drinking....

I get they were excited as they had a much needed little break from a stressful time, but I really am thinking of asking them to go back tomorrow rather than staying any more days. AIBU? And how should I approach this with the neighbours? Just a quick sorry next time I see them?

They’ve also broken a few bits in the house by falling into them.

Both DH and I are pretty mortified. But also know they’ve been stressed and want to give them an opportunity to unwind.

I'm sick of people blaming the government because the rules are "confusing". They claim they're confusing because it gives them an excuse to flout the rules and then claim they didn't "understand" them

Well, if Dominic Cummings can't understand them, what hope is there for the rest of us? Perhaps the OP was just testing her hearing by having loud friends to stay.

If you were my neighbour, and this was a one off night, I wouldn't bat an eyelid. You have a strange view of friendship if you are going to end friendships over one drunken night. Hell, I have had to wipe sick from my friends faces after a night out - its one night. Have a word with them maybe but imagine choosing your new neighbours over some of your oldest friends

Wtf is homophobic about saying gay couple???

And to the person saying the police could get Mumsnet to give them the OPs details to arrest them!!

This thread is bonkers. Op, your mates got pissed and a bit loud. I'd just apologise to your neighbours and move on. It's really not the end of the world.

They have hearts of gold,

They obviously haven’t got hearts of gold.

They have broken your stuff and humiliated you.

I’d talk to them today and say you don’t want to upset the neighbours so can they keep it down until they go. Then if they don’t I don’t think it would be harsh to ask them to leave.

The op appears to have listened to the announcement in the 23rd June and completely ignored the fact it doesn't come into effect until 4th July.
Can you imagine if all the businesses eager to open on the 4th did the same?
It wasn't confusing at all but people only hear what they want to which is why we're not getting back to normal for a long while.

Being gay is irrelevant

Using the c word constantly is offensive to many people and shouting it loud at the end of every sentence .... !

You need to go look at the government website for the Bubble thing. Staying in your home and crawling into your bedroom isn't really in the bubble thing. Staying overnight isn't in the bubble thing.

You need to apologise to your neighbours because you invited those dreadful people into your garden/home .... They sound awful and not people I'd want to invite over.

Oh you are just as bad as them since you have totally ignored the rules and not only that been one of 'those' awful people who need to have loud parties when most people are attempting to keep the virus from spreading...

Op if that were me I'd be asking if I could come and join you 😝

You broke a lot of rules/etiquette, as a neighbour who gets anxious over noise I would be worried this was going to happen every night.

@worryworryworryworry

Op if that were me I'd be asking if I could come and join you 😝

Would you really, having heard another neighbour being called a cunt for asking them to keep the noise down? Like obviously calls to like.

@Cramitmaam

They clearly know they had embarrassed us. As they had left in the morning by the time we had woken leaving a note saying there had been some sort of emergency at home....

They tidied the kitchen but I am really pissed off with them they couldn’t stick around because they knew they were going to get a bollocking....

Couldn’t even face the music! It’s typical really....

Wtf is homophobic about saying gay couple???

This.

Same sex couple, gay couple, two men in a relationship... Whatever.
It’s not homophobic to say any of the above.

OP was describing her friend’s relationship to one another for context.

They are not brothers or single male friends or two men who have gone out for a night on the piss and left their partners/ children at home.
They are a Gay couple - in a relationship.

Are we no longer able to use the word ‘Gay’?
Tell that to my Gay friends... They use the word frequently!

So they are not sweet. They dont have hearts of gold. They have behaved appallingly.
As have you. In the middle of a pandemic.
Fucking disgraceful. No wonder the UK is the shitshow it is and the laughing stock of Europe.

Just seen your update.
They are not good friends.

[quote Rebecca980]@Cramitmaam

They clearly know they had embarrassed us. As they had left in the morning by the time we had woken leaving a note saying there had been some sort of emergency at home....

They tidied the kitchen but I am really pissed off with them they couldn’t stick around because they knew they were going to get a bollocking....

Couldn’t even face the music! It’s typical really....[/quote]
That tells you what you need to know.
If it was a real emergency they would have woken you surely!

Oh look, another post from OP ignoring her selfish breaking of the lockdown rules.

@Newkitchen123 They must have gone really early as I was up at 7.15!
I don’t think they remember specifics but DH is calling them this morning while he walks the dogs to give them a reminder...

Rules? Stanley Johnson, Bozo's dad, has gone on holiday to Bulgaria. Even his dad won't comply so lay off the OP and write to your MP instead.

Oh look, another irrelevant post on lockdown rules

Just to give you a bit of support RE everyone trying to shame you over the bubble thing; I know quite a few people on social media who have mixed with groups because they don’t really get it either. This government have been very confusing I think. I don’t know the rules because I haven’t taken any notice. I haven’t seen anyone (Except for work) and don’t plan to for weeks yet, but everyone who is having a go at you must be perfect all the time and I imagine haven’t left their houses or gone to the beach or shopping or anything. And definitely won’t be going out in 3 days time. Lots of people have misunderstood the rules, it’s a mistake and you shouldn’t be constantly beaten over the head with it. People who, after 9 pages, jump on the bandwagon to tell you that you ‘don’t understand the bubble’ are being a bit daft - you’ve admitted it, they need to move on!

@longwayoff

Rules? Stanley Johnson, Bozo's dad, has gone on holiday to Bulgaria. Even his dad won't comply so lay off the OP and write to your MP instead.

Is this the way we're going next, posts about Dominic Cummings were maybe slightly amusing for a couple of days, now tedious and nothing whatsoever to discussion. Do we need to start it all up again.

In the words of parents around the land, two wrongs don't make a right.

Ah, they aren't nice people. I was thinking that this morning they would be waiting for you to have a serious chat and apologize sincerely. Instead they have taken the coward's way out. I wouldn't invite them again if I were you.

Considering the neighbours, the ones who they were directly rude to, I would apologize too, but the rest I wouldn't bother with. One of my neighbours had a barbeque last summer which ended with loud swearing, fist fights and the police arriving. I live in a nice, rather middle-class area. It just gave us all something to laugh about.

I agree with Gunpowder-about texting apology to neighbours and telling friends off. I also think you could loose friends like this.It looks like you have matured a bit and they haven't. Freinds, having made a mistake like that, would be apologising to your neighbours themselves, and to you. They would realise that they shouldn't not have done it, and would make amends. I understand they have had a tough time, but still, they have to give a thought to others, and respect the kindess of an offer of a break.

God, they sneaked off during the night?! Rude as all get out.