Friend choosing same baby name less than a year later

[OohAHzeah]

I know she didn't look at my dd and decide to copy us exactly. When I announced dd name she said congrats and that she had always loved it herself. I didnt think much more and then she became pregnant.

Her baby is due soon and in the same school year as mine. She just announced today she will probably use dd name (!!) She didn't even make a joke like "hope that's not too weird!" She just stated it like fact and said she quite liked it.

Dd name is quite unusual btw. It's not typical Evie/Evelyn.

I get she may have loved this name secretly just as I did, but to really use it when I just have? If we had no friends in common it might be nice, but we have so many friends in common. Our whole school group and some uni too. Just made me feel a bit rubbish. Dh thinks I'm being silly, but he's not that close to her. I just feel like she's taking away the 'special-ness' of her name. Either that or she thinks we won't see much of each other. I love this name so much but if she'd used it first, I wouldn't have out or respect! But then is that just me being the fool?

I know I cant do anything about it.

But it's a bit weird?

YABU: Totally normal to have same name as friend if you liked it

YANBU: It's a bit weird to purposely use the same one

I know that’s strange but I wanted my children to be a bit unique

It’s not - it what normal people do!

No way would I give up a name I loved because someone else used it first. Nope.

"It's unfortunate but it will look like she copied the friend & will have to introduce her to their friends with "I know she's got the same name but I've always loved it" which is a bit of a mouthful 🙊 each time - just being practical 🤔"

I imagine she will just say this is my daughter "inserts name" 🤷🏼‍♀️

I really don't get the whole picking an unusual name thing. I have a friend who was so obsessed with finding a unique name that she would lool for names ranked like 3000 and under. She ended up picking a name that she admits she doesn't even really like but it 'unique'.
There is a reason why some baby names are really unpopular!

This happens all the time: people pick unusual names for their babies, but other people think in similar ways at similar times and every school year had a bunch of kids with the same name that their parents thought was unusual.

It is annoying but just how it goes, you might as well get over it.

(Also she may have always planned to use that name and been cheesed of that you used it).

It's really irrelevant. My dd has ended up being best friends with someone with the same name! They didn't meet until high school.

YABU - I have family friends whose cousins have the same name. No one ever confused them and they are about the same age. No one ever felt that they had exclusive rights to a name, whether common or rare. The children themselves will be unique and special to each of their parents and friends (even mutual ones) regardless of their shared name. You may even find others with the same name once your dd is in school. Try to think of it as something you share and enjoy instead of something that is a threat to you.

YANBU but everyone will tell you otherwise.

It IS weird and she will look silly for using it, particularly as you share a school and a friendship group. Literally everyone will assume she has copied you whether she has or not and she will be judged accordingly.

So smile, breathe out and let her get on with her silliness.

I picked my DD's name and I kid you not, 6 months after she was born every fecker in a 20 mile radius picked the same bloody name and this happened TWICE and both names are uncommon..... you couldn't make it up.

ah that’s not on

When my 2 BFF's and I were ALL pregnant, one knew the gender but wanted the name to be a surprise. One didn't know the gender. I knew the gender and told everyone which name I had chosen. I was also due last.

One month before I was due, BF who didn't know what gender the baby was, called me when her baby was born and asked permission for the name, as her chose name was very very very similar. (Like Evie and Eve).

I told her to call her baby whatever she wanted.
My baby was born 5 weeks later, and I stuck to my name choice.

Ten years later, no one has ever mixed the DC up. We are still best friends.

You don't own a name.

YABU

My sister in law did this with another SIL
Always thought it showed a lack of imagination myself

@nopoo

1. Your friend rang up and asked you.

2. It was still a different name.

Both different to the op's experience.

@BabyLlamaZen different by one letter, and yes she did ask.

OP's friend hasn't even given birth yet.

I also have two friends called Anne and Annie, who both called their daughters Charlotte. (True!). They manage just fine.

You are missing the point though.

No one owns a name. It's just not worth the energy.

A friend called her daughter Harper just before the Beckhams' daughter was born. I knew she was going to call her daughter that years before she met her husband, when she read To Kill a Mockingbird.
She was so miffed that it has now become so popular.

Could be worse.

When I was 8 my parents friends called their dog the same as my name.....

@PyongyangKipperbang
My boss had new people move in next door who asked him to change the name of his dog because it was the same as their daughter and she didn’t like it!