Spendthrift daughter

[Zizzagaaaaah]

My daughter is 16 and has her own debit card which she has had for a few years
at the beginning of the year, I told her that I would be giving her, £85 per month to buy clothes with
Out of this, she pays for her Netflix subscription £5.99- I pay for her phone

She has a love of Brandy Melville clothes, which although aren't wildly expensive - they are pricier than some for bog-standard t-shirt

She needs clothes for college and has so far since April has put in 6 separate orders with Brandy.
each time she has paid £3.50 shipping

Today the postman delivered a package from boots with some bio-oil and dove face wash
She paid £3.50 for the delivery (We have a Lloyds chemist less than 5 min walk and boots and Superdrug in our local small town) We also get a weekly shop from Tesco (the bio-oil is £2.50 cheaper)

She doesn't even think about using her student discount and then moans that she doesn't have enough to buy the things she wants.

I've spoken to her many times but it's falling on deaf ears

I know this is small stuff but it's really starting to annoy me that she doesn't seem to care that she can save money every time she shops, either by waiting and buying more each time (instead of buying a single t-shirt and paying £3.50 to have it delivered) or going to the local shops

Do I ignore it and quietly seethe as it's her money and hopefully when she starts having to earn it herself the penny might drop?

Ds is 16, by law once he was 16 he had to have his PIP paid in to his own bank account, he gets £450ish a month plus £80 a month bursary from school as he qualifies for pupil premium. He buys all his own clothes, meals, coffees & snacks at school, any books or equipment he needs for school, any presents for friends & family, he usually saves £200 a month towards when he can learn to drive, he recently qualified for a disabled person's travel card so that has saved him £35 a month. He pays his Xbox subscription, Netflix, Amazon prime, I pay Britbox, Acorn TV & YouTube premium so we share them between us. I pay his mobile bill at present but when his contract is up in June next year he will pay his own phone bill. He buys most of his toiletries but I will sometimes buy him a couple of cans of deodorant if it is on offer when I do our online shop. He uses his student discount wherever he can or uses Nectar or Top Cashback to get the best deals, he also collects Boots points & uses them towards gifts or things he needs. I buy him things like socks & pants because I honestly think he would never buy them himself. He buys ingredients if he wants to cook his own tea or pays for takeaways if he is out or late home. I am trying to step away from micromanaging his finances to teach him to manage his own money, I have only had to bail him out twice when he hadn't allowed for something he had ordered but not deducted from his bank balance.

PimpleMoose seriously, its more than enough! Maybe her dd should get a job if she needs more money?
I'd assume (based on looking at the current cost at my own college, in a cheap area) that the transit cost averages out to at least £25 per month. That would leave about £13.85 per week, to cover lunch at college, toiletries, clothes, any sort of social life and birthday/christmas presents for others. If she's managing that then, notwithstanding that she might waste a few pounds here and there, then I'd say she's doing pretty well.

Possibly I've painted a bleaker picture than it actually was
Maybe. I mean, you say you got £260 per year and had to buy sanitary products from that. The average cost of sanitary products for a year in the UK is about £130, so that's half of your allowance gone. Then you had to buy your own clothes and books (albeit second hand) and christmas and birthday presents for people. It might be possible but it certainly sounds very difficult.

In fact, subtracting the costs of sanitary products (based on the average), you were receiving less pocket money than the average 4 year old in the UK.

www.statista.com/statistics/1006191/average-value-of-pocket-money-in-the-uk-by-age/

And 4 year olds are generally not expected to clothe themselves either.

Young teenager, given £85 a month = teaching her to be profligate. Parents have more money than sense.

[quote PimpleMoose]@GlummyMcGlummerson

You obviously have little concept of how expensive things are in the modern world.

There is no way that £85 per month is loads when it has to cover:

• transit to and from college;
• lunches at college;
• clothes;
• toiletries; and
• entertainment/socializing.

Frankly, even if she makes the odd frivolous decision, the OP's daughter is doing remarkably well to stretch the money as far as she is.[/quote]
@PimpleMoose I've thought about what you said and yes you're right! I suppose when I hear £85 for a teenager my "90's £20 a week job and that was really good back then" mindset kicked in. But yes for all that, if it was me, I would just about meet the £85 budget. Probably without treating myself too much. I forget how expensive buses are!