My mother in law is driving me insane

[Mummytobe10101]

I’m going crazy. I gave birth 2 weeks ago to a beautiful baby boy. And my mother in law kindly came round and said she will stay with me to help me with the baby. I was happy with this at first but now I’m going insane and I want to cry. My partner really wants her here and finds it offensive that I want her to leave because he adores his mum and feels like her advice is invaluable. He is working at the moment so I am alone with her in the day. It is my mother in law’s culture for baby boys to get circumcised. Each to their own but I disagree with this. I despise confrontation but she has talked again and again today about when he’s going to be circumcised and both times I’ve said he’s not. She’s also criticising me because he’s having expressed breast milk instead of sucking from the breast. And she’s told me I’m not moisturising his skin correctly/ giving him constipation by not feeding him breast milk from the breast/ not feeding him enough just before bed/ the list goes on. And also she told me to massage his nose to make is smaller and mould it which really upset me. I’ve been in tears on the phone to my mum and she’s fuming. I just want to scream. I’m a new mum and I feel so judged and awful. Help :( :(

But that's because another poster came on here saying that her DSs had been circumcised and defending the action. That was never going to end well. It derailed the thread, since it was not the point of the thread, as the OP doesn't intend for her DS to be circumcised.

Perhaps if the op had come back to her thread it would have got back on track?

Think everyone has said it here already, but:

• contact your GP and get that you don't want baby circumcised put on his medical notes.

-Also contact health visitor and raise your concerns with her.

-You need to make it clear to her that this is on your son's notes, and if she get this done without your permission you will regard it as an assault and will report them to the Police. Tell her that trying to mould a baby's facial features is just plain bizarre and if she doesn't like your son the way he is, maybe she shouldn't bother. Also mention that she is over-involved in her advice giving and it is ruining these early memories you have and you won't get them back. You don't have to speak to her, leave her a note/send an email then go and stay with your mother.

People like this need standing up to. I would do it now or it will never stop. Just lose it at her if need be, and hopefully she will get the hump and disappear for a while. She will try to drive a wedge between you and her son no doubt, but it will be quite telling who he puts first.