Am I the only person who doesn't know any trans people?

[LaureBerthaud]

Non goady question.

I don't know any, work with any or come across any trans people. Now it could be that they've done such a good job of transitioning that I don't notice, but where are they?

I've met a few at various events and they were all very nice. I knew a girl at primary school who had her hair very short, used to hang around the boys' toilets and always seemed very unsure of herself and say she wanted to be a boy. I wonder if she might have been trans, or just didn't feel she fitted into feminine moulds. I didn't know her very well.

I know one non binary they/them. A friend's teenager.

In this particular person's case it seems like it's an attempt to escape what they feel to be oppressive female gender expectations.

I do not hate them, and wish them well. I would be interested to see if they still identified as non binary if there were no gender roles or expectations, though. But that's purely hypothetical.

I've also been told that because I do not feel like a woman I am agender and therefore trans. I disagree. I have no particular objection to being called it by others, but I do not identify as agender. I do not identify at all.

I don't know any. However, as a primary teacher, I know some children who are now that they are teens. All of them either have ASD or very traumatic childhoods.

Don't know anyone but a few people I have seen around. The only one I ever spoke to (5 or 6 times) was a NHS receptionist, appeared to be MtF. Quiet professional person, seemed very nice.

DD was quite close buddies with a F2M teenager who much later DD decided was an annoying attention seeker. DD would say being trans was not why they were annoying.

Oh, I know a couple of non-binary people too. They go by the pronouns "they" or of their original sex, though, so it's not hard to keep up.

I know four within my own lives (two teen children of my own friends, a teen acquaintance of DC and one of DC's teachers.) Also used to get chased around a nightclub by a woman who I was later told was a transman when I was in my early twenties.

One trans woman I used to work with. Don't know if she had fully transitioned. She wasn't happy though and had obvious mental health issues. It was sad to see.

But what of the cross dresser in question doesn’t consider themselves as trans? Because I know a cross dresser who is vocally adamant he isn’t trans and I think he’s best placed to know.

Well the one you know might not. But that one case doesn't alter the definition of transgender according to Stonewall, the leading trans advocacy organisation in the U.K.

sleepydragons
Maybe.... This is a very slim person, long hair, they like to dye it a colour, prominent Adam’s apple, not terribly tall. In their 40’s and wears glasses. From memory has a unisex name.

I think it depends on your community. I was a member of my university’s LGBT+ society and then worked for an HIV charity and now sit on the board of a rape crisis centre, so I have met trans people from all three of those avenues. I have three close friends who are trans and then 4 more who I don’t know very well but am acquaintances with.

Without that background, I don’t think I would know many trans people. There is one person who works for the same company as me who I know is trans but she works in a different office so I’ve only met her twice. I went to uni with one non-binary person but we weren’t close and I can’t actually remember their name now.

I can only think of two in my orbit. I wouldn’t say I know either of them, but I know who they are. Both MtF, neither passes successfully. I also know one cross dresser who atm isn’t describing himself as trans.
It seems to me that FtM pass more successfully than MtF, but why is that? If they were better able to pass, their lives might be easier? Leaving aside the politics, my heart goes out to them when I see them.

No don’t know anyone. Suspect the teenagers are doing it for attention

I have met two in my lifetime

One about 18 years ago who very much fitted the "man in a dress" description. Very nice person and I remember they were referred to in the meeting as transvestite but I think that is more because transgender was lesser known than transvestite. They were definitely identifying as female though.

More recently, again through work, a trans woman who very much looked like a woman so I think was fully transitioned. I would not have known they were a woman if she had not been giving a presentation on transgender rights. She's quite well known in the equality talk circuit but she's not an activist and I don't think she's on social media.

I have mixed feelings about trans and non binary. I try to be understanding and they aren't doing any harm and are nice people, but i do worry about young people .

I think many of them identify as trans or non binary simply because its seen as cool and not because they genuinely are trans.

This risk them making decisions and doing things that they may later regret.

A friend's daughter & someone I went to school with are both transmen.

And a friend if a friend is a trans woman.

There are probably people I'm unaware of too 🤷🏼‍♀️

(Friend OF a friend)

correction: would not have known that they were NOT a woman

An old friend is transitioning male to female.
I used to run a gay nightclub so I still have a couple of m to f friends from then. Nobody younger than 30.

I didn't until about a year ago when one of my old highschool friends came out as transgender. Although tbh I don't really know her that well.

Only one , who was lovely
And that’s all !
I’m listening to both sides on this
It’s actually stressing me out !
I support women , but as I said on another thread I struggle

Oh I think Eddie Izzard had transitioned now too.

@FairfaxAikman

I know someone who is "non-binary". Which basically means he's a beardy bloke who wears pink clothes sometimes and occasionally wears a floral hairband 🙄

From the "enby" friends on his FB, who I've had many a debate with ("no Transwomen do not have periods") the females either have short hair or colourful hair (blue, pink or purple) and the men either make no changes or wear "female" clothing occasionally

Except some of those, who take oestrogen profess to having menstrual symptoms. Except I take the same hormone as them after a total hysterectomy. I can 100% confirm I no longer have the mood swings and searing back / stomach / inner thigh pain or any of the nausea and headaches / migraines etc associated with menstruation.

Sorry that last comment wasn’t clear. Totally with you Fairfax

Just a little reminder that the validity / authenticity of trans people can’t be judged by how well they pass. It is, simply, harder for some trans people to pass than others because of physical characteristics which are out of their control. Those who don’t pass as effectively are more likely to be the subject of derision, judgement, or abuse. But The ability to pass is no reflection on a person’s identity and sense of self.