Am I the only person who doesn't know any trans people?

[LaureBerthaud]

Non goady question.

I don't know any, work with any or come across any trans people. Now it could be that they've done such a good job of transitioning that I don't notice, but where are they?

I've had friends in the past who were mtf,very genuine people just living their life.
One of my DDS friends(17)is ftm,does have mental health issues not helped at all by puberty blockers.At lot more girls call themselve non binary,DD says it's because you can not change anything but it also stops further questioning.

Two that I know off. One M2F who was a neighbour and the milkman. The other a teenager F2M.
The first rejected by her family and the other completely accepted. That made a huge difference.

Except its her response to people being judgmental of the community. I'm not out for an argument, I responded based on how her reply read.

Read it again, she, was talking about one specific person and not a community.

People are so ready to leap on their high horses.

I have a friend whose Dad is trans - as in M2F but still referred to as Dad rather than Mum. Seems very pleasant - sat with us at my friend’s wedding.

In my family or friendships groups I know of non but I do come across them in public - possibly more than I know as of course as these are strangers its only those who are more obviously trans than I notice.

Read it again, she, was talking about one specific person and not a community.

Didn't read that way at all to me. Seems like a weird response to another poster pointing out judgments towards the community. If you want to believe it was just about the one person, then go for it. But don't try to convince of that

I know loads, but that's probably because I am bi, and a third of trans people are also bi.

@sleepydragons it's impossible to have a reasonable conversation with someone who deliberately misreads and misrepresents what you say because they're hell bent on pushing their own agenda. I absolutely despair.

I think it's pretty obvious to anyone with half a brain and able to read the 'unfortunate' in your post was realting to an unfortunately poor example of someone you knew and the 'them' was referring to that individual not a, while community. Some people just want to be outraged though

Unless you knew them before and after you may not know

I know, definately, of two
One my DH's friend's girlfriend - he actually brought it up far far more than she did and about how enlightened he was for having a trans partner

The other was staying as au pair for a friend - it only came up when some random person started attacking her on her business facebook page for being transphobic for a comment she had made (which actually was along the lines as she wanted to use the term mother when talking about not birthing parent) and the aupair stuck up for her and put on the page that she was trans

I do work with someone who has quite a deep voice and a more masculine appearance but I don't think she's trans, and even if she is unless she wants to share it's nothing to do with me

@startrek90

*@BanginChoons

I would say your child is definitely male and appears to be full of three same male entitlement. Speaking as the mother of boys you really need to get on that, its our responsibility to try and ensure our sons do not grow up to be misogynists. I don't blame your child for their sexism and disregard for females, but I blame you for indulging it.*
As I read @Bangingchoons' first post her son is f to m which makes a complete nonsense of your comment.

I gathered by using he that banginchoons was referring to a transboy ie a female to male who menustrates and apparently would like to be known as a person who menustrates so not nonsense.

If the ops child insists they are a boy then they are and it is on the op to ensure that her son does nit indulge in misogyny and casual sexism.

Not nonsense. I will respect the ops child to be called he and treated as male, however I would not tolerate from anyone the dismissal of my reality or indeed I dulge any misogyny or casual sexism from my own sons

@CaptainMyCaptain

See @BanginChoons earlier post:

*My son is trans. He is 15 and came out 2 years ago. He has gender dysphoria had hates his female form., and has been much happier in himself since identifying ad male, although of course it does bring it's own challenges.

He was upset over the patronising "wimmon" comments made by JK recently, as he considers himself a person who menstruates, *

That is the post I was referring to. If he was a girl and now identifies as a boy but is still menstruating how is that misogyny or sexism? Actually don't bother, this thread is becoming quite toxic, abusing a young teenager who you know nothing about is just not on.

If you menstruate - you know what that means.

Saying otherwise and attacking people who state basic biology does not change the fact. It shows a lack of maturity and realism. Embrace it - it’s what you are and what made you. You can’t wish to be anything else because that not how the world works. Kick against all you like - it won’t change a thing and will only male you deeply unhappy.

I know two personally. One is a former neighbor who I still regularly as a friend. Old school transsexual, she's had all the surgery done years ago before I met her and passed quite well as a woman, although it has to be said that she is quite a bit older than most trans women I've seen online and dresses quite conservatively which probably makes a difference as to how obvious it is. Lovely woman, is very critical of the modern transgender movement.

The other is someone who I went to school with, a female who has started identifying as a man fairly recently. This is someone who's had crippling, debilitating anxiety and regular panic attacks since we were teenager, not helped by difficult parents who did nothing to help and has had a very hard time as an adult. To be honest, I don't think that them "being born in the wrong body" is really the issue but it's being offered as a panacea.

I have met and or been around transmen and transwomen in my social circles or at events. One had very evidently not transitioned and took me a few minutes to pin what was different about the woman before me, showcase show at a distance wearing tankini of sorts, later I met them in the womens toilet. One I didn't know was a transman until someone told me so I wouldn't have known otherwise. All adults, went to highschool 15+ yrs ago and there was a boy who wore makeup and later transitioned into a woman.

No I don’t know any personally, 2 trans women I used to see regularly in my local M&S, pre Covid, always in the women’s underwear dept., neither passed, middle aged men dressed as women. I felt a bit sorry for them.

I work in a large secondary school, and I know of 3 trans boys - all girls who, age 15-16, have decided they are boys. One of them I know through school, the other two I know them / their families personally too.

One has devastatingly low self esteem and a lot of mental health issues.

One is probably going to come out as gay sooner or later (her first relationship after coming out as trans was with a lesbian girl. Who has since also come out as a trans boy). The mind just boggles.

The third is a total and utter attention-seeker with very woke, alternative parents. Her dad is a SAHM, non working, blue-haired dude. Her mum is lovely, but in a very demanding job so the child has been brought up by her plonker of a father. She has always been hard work.

@CaptainMyCaptain

The sexism is the refusal to allow another woman use the term 'woman' to describe her own lived experiences of menstruation. This continual onslaught to deny women the ability to talk about their own lived experiences and biology is sexist to its core.

Misogyny and sexism are not unique to men, I have unfortunately come across many women who have internalised misogyny and are agents in their own oppression. See the numerous examples of handmaidens going along with this anti woman agenda.

For what it's worth being uncomfortable with menstruation, puberty and your body is not unique to transboys. Indeed I have yet to meet a teenage girl who is comfortable. Whilst I am deeply sympathetic to this young person's distress at their own biology, I do not think they have the right to take away JKR, mine or indeed any other individual womans right to talk about it. Women and girls menustrate, boys and men don't. That isn't transphobic or mean, that's science.

I did not attack the child, if you read my post I blamed the poster for indulging this entitlement. I believe as parents we must raise our children to be resilient and respectful. I certainly do not allow my sons to indulge in casual sexism and the silencing of women and I was critising the poster for allowing her son to do the same. If you have a son, you have responsibilities to teach them that just because they are boys, and in turn more valued and respected in this sexist society, does not mean they are entitled to treat women and girls as inferior or valueless.

I'm acquainted with three males who've gone as far as cosmetic undercarriage surgery. They've all got deep-seated issues around what it means to be a man.

My youngest niece's mother identified as a man for a few years; it was a bit of a psychological clusterfuck for a two year old to have to cope with.

Two of my eldest niece's ex-girlfriends identify as straight boys now.

DD's father is identified-by-Stonewall-as-trans - he's an AGP and adamant that he's not actually a woman and it's just a sex thing.

I'm also identified-by-Stonewall-as-trans, but as I refuse to deny my sex I'm a terf rather than a transman.

And of course, there's rapist number two, who likes to waffle on about how terrible his non-existent periods are on social media.

A friend started dating a guy, further on in their relationship he then then started to transition m to f. They stayed together but I couldn’t stand them, they were nasty, manipulative, permanently offended and really negatively affected my friend. Thankfully they split up!

Honestly all the trans people I know in real life are actively unpleasant people (know a few in various circles) not trying to be inflammatory at all, I don’t think every trans person is awful that’s just my general experience....

I don’t know any either

I don't know any.

I don’t know any personally, but there’s a TW at the climbing centre I go to who just loves to strut around the women’s communal changing room in lacy underwear...

@AngeloMysterioso

I don’t know any personally, but there’s a TW at the climbing centre I go to who just loves to strut around the women’s communal changing room in lacy underwear...

Somehow I doubt this is true