DD Shaved Her Head

[CrazyLady82]

More of a wwyd.

My DD18 has just called me and told me she has shaved her head. DD already had short hair.

DD reasons were that her hair was damaged from all the coloring and she didn't like the color it was.

I am sitting here trying not to loose my mind. I am currently 25 weeks pregnant with DD2 and am thinking part of my reaction is pregnancy hormones. After telling DD I wasn't happy with the choice, but it was her choice I hung up the phone. I have been crying and silent screaming for 10 minutes.

I don't want to say anything to bad to her. I know that it is her choice.

Could someone help give me a reality check that shaving her head isn't that bad? I need to get a grip as it is her life.

Have you asked yourself whether you would have reacted in the same way if a male relative shaved their hair?

Do you get upset if your daughter shaves her pits/pubes/ legs?

Aestheticcally wise, it doesn't really look that much different from slapping it back in a pony tail.

Therefore why is it so upsetting for you that she has shaved the hair on her head? It's just an area of short hair?

BTW, you have the best excuse for reacting badly tho. I can imagine being pg in lock down is hard. Do ring her back and tell her you're sorry you reacted the way you did tho. X

I would feel like you if I had a daughter but it seems like she does a lot of things with her hair so it's probably just another style she thought she could try during lock down it would be the best time to try it. She probably doesn't want to shock you so called to let you know in advance of your meeting up. My DS told me he had done the same because his hair had gone wild I don't particularly like shaved heads unless someone is part bald then it does look better. I think just be supportive maybe she needs your loving attention before you give it all to the new baby and she feels like she's going to lose a big part of you.

Well if the OP has gone, I wouldn't blame her.

Some of what has been written on this thread, leads me to believe some of you are clearly bored, and some of you are clearly nasty judgmental bitches.

So much for people supporting each other, the ones who offered kind and considerate advice are in the minority.

If the OP overreacted to her daughters new haircut it is probably due to her pregnancy hormones. She has been trying for 10 years for another child, imagine what she's gone through and what she's going through now.

But no, some of the vipers with their poison venom only want to make this emotionally vulnerable woman feel worse.

Shame on you, let's hope you never have shitty emotional day and get torn down on here.

She’s not called you to tell you she’s pregnant
She’s not been arrested, calling you from a police station
You’ve not received a call saying she’s dead
She’s only shaved her head and her hair will grow back
So many girls do terrible treatments to their hair from such a young age that if damages the hair and perhaps her shaving it then allowing it to grow back will be a good thing for the health of her hair.
Don’t be so hard on her or yourself
Soon you’ll be able to laugh at this

Lovely post Icepinkeskimo.

When I was pregnant I went from fine, to incandescent with rage, to tears in 30 seconds. At the time, things that seem minor now, were devastating.

It must be even harder for you OP with everything that’s going on.

A few months from now her hair will have grown back and you’ll have your much longed for baby. You’ll look back at this one day and laugh, or at least roll your eyes!

Let me give you a different perspective. I’m a dog groomer and when a dog comes to me with matted or damaged hair, I shave it short. It’s more comfortable for the dog and it all grows back!

Good on her for having the confidence to do it! It will grow back. There are bigger things to worry about....

You should be pleased op - your reaction indicates that you have bugger all else to worry about.

My Mum had four very uncomplicated kids and made a massive fuck off drama about everything we did. She once told me I'd "mutilated myself" because of an ear piercing at 20.

I know your pregnant but you need to pull yourself together and try to avoid silent screaming.

Tried to cut my daughter Becky’s hair! And to be honest, I thought it was perfect! But Becky thought otherwise and went hysterical over it! That was yesterday this is today and she totally forgot about it! Like it never happened! 🤣

There are much worse things she could do!

I’ve been tempted to shave my head since lockdown (it was down to my waist til I trimmed it recently)... this thread is making me really want to!

She did it out of choice it could be much worse. Kids do it because of cancer on a daily basis. It will grow back.

Fuck me, 16 pages in and you think nobody has already said it'll grow back.

I had my hair buzz cut by my husband on 30th March - was basically a skinhead with a short fringe. Today it looks like a Mr Whippy ice cream, it's grown so much. It will be buzzed off again tonight!
Photos attached.

my daughter lost hers to cancer thankfully yourshada choice and i bet she still looks gorgeius

Swampytigga

You look gorgeous! It's very striking and stylish.

Over 18 so she's clearly an adult and it'll grow back! Pregnancy hormones not playing fair.

Stop using hormones as an excuse, it's her hair grow up.

She’s 18, and it was for a good reason if the hair was badly damaged from colouring. It’ll grow back quickly and will be very healthy again. I bleached mine practically white around the same age, from its natural almost-black. My hair was like straw, and I couldn’t cover it with a sensible colour for a few days. Had to work and go to school with that hot mess!

Get a grip love! It's hair! If shes doing it for attention, ignore it and enthuse about the hair!!

When I was 18 (I'm nearly 52 now), I had a spider cut (very short, probably a #3 with fringes all round. I went to the barbers and had the #3 bit shaved bald. I loved it, it felt amazing but my mum went postal (I'd moved out by then). But it grew back. No harm done. About 15 years later I used to have it around a #2 all over. Again...it grew back. The more you fight her on this, the more she'll rebel. She's old enough to make her own decisions and mistakes

Seriously nasty people on this thread .Veganveal we don't need to know all about your history and yes hormones do make you go ape shit without thinking .Hope the venomous mouths realise how nasty they been .

What is silent screaming???

Has it grown back yet already?

She might be 18 years and not 18 months old but it sounds as though she's struggling with the idea of becoming a big sister.
Maybe she just needs reassurance that this longed for and very wanted baby isn't going to 'push' her out. Perhaps she thinks she's about to become a live in baby sitter.

Should she have been doing A'levels this and going off to Uni? That and the covid situation could be an added pressure. My DD18 is struggling because everything was mapped out, she was going to be studying hard and taking exams then there would have been the proms, the last day of school, the plans for the carefree summer, the holiday, the knowledge that she would be off to uni and the excitement of living independently, freshers week, new friends... Now Uni is an unknown, the grades will never be totally her own, there won't be that satisfaction of achieving the best grades or the knowledge that she did her best (or not as the case may be).

Throw a baby sister into the mix and there is a whole load more unknown. If she is going off to Uni, maybe she feels threatened and the baby feels like a replacement.
Would something like, "I'll be honest, it was a shock but I'll get used to it. It's not so bad, you've got a lovely shaped head It's hard for a mother realising that her little girl is all grown up and doing her own thing", help.