To think women's lives don't matter...

[DragonTrainedByLucy]

Warning I am incredibly fucked off with the World right for several reasons so apologies for the rant.

I literally am getting slammed left, right and centre for not being vocal on social media about Black Lives Matter and for not attending any of the three local protests (I am shielding, but supposedly it's OK to go because social distancing measure are in place). I'm also concerned due to the high proportionality of members from the BAME community due to COVID and the fact the R number has risen close to 1.

I supported #blackouttuesday - I got it wrong, I did the black square but I also did two posts on inspirational BAME employers in the two sectors I work in (this was supposedly the wrong bit). I got abuse.

What has really hacked me off though is that some of the people who are having a go at me for the lack of support to the #BLM movement are people who have sat next to me whilst I've been on the receiving end of really severe mysoginistic abuse and really serious abuse relating to gender identity (I have a trauma diagnosis that leads to gender identity confusion). These are not one off times, it's been multiple occasions.

Generally wondering where the support has been for women for the last three years (and all women, regardless of race, but this does also impact women from BAME communities negatively).

Have I missed it? If I have can someone please point me to the circles on where I will find where/how the female support happens because I really need it right now.

Also to all the BAME community, I am sorry for the continued shit you have to go to - I have donated (through three of the various links). I hope this ends with better outcomes for you all.

@Ohtherewearethen what protests did I know about?

And no I am not "suddenly" enraged, just like the BAME community aren't suddenly enraged.

You said you didn't know about the ones PP have mentioned on here. I didn't say you knew about them. Why have you just started this thread now then? Why do you keep comparing yourself to BAME people? Of course it's a 'what about me though' reaction to the BLM protests.

It’s really not. It’s about the absence of allies for women. BLM has galvanised men and women of all ethnicities in support. Quite rightly. Where are the men risking their lives to protest against the murder of Grace Millane, the mothers and babies in Afghanistan that I mentioned earlier, the two women a week murdered by their partners? All victims of male violence - an epidemic in plain sight.

Women on the Me Too March were told not to centre female bodies. Imagine BLM marches being told not to centre black bodies .

I think what @Ohtherewearethen is saying is that you could have said this at any other time but you have picked the time that others are fighting for their rights on a global platform, almost like it has reminded you to stand up for you beliefs.

But you have said you weren’t aware if the marches in 2017 and 2018 (although it is a bit odd as they were highly publicised) and that you do not want to take away from BLM, you are angry daily about the treatment of women.

I totally get your point about men not standing up for women in the same way. I don’t think you meant malice to BLM but you are ignorant and taking that on board to learn about it.

It does seem odd that you didn’t know about the women’s matches (DH attended with me and DD and we saw other men there, so some are allies although not enough) but we all have times in our lives that stuff goes in and the outside world falls away.

BLM has been around for about 7 years. You will have heard about it in the news every now and again but it has never had the support that it has at this very moment. There has never been so many people actually understanding their white privilege. That is huge. There will be plenty denying it’s existence and there will be more deaths based on colour but there will be more allies. Hopefully enough to change things for future generations.

For me as a black person who has suffered racism and a woman who has suffered for it, I prefer that the racism is highlighted more this period.

As a woman, I have at least 50% of the population with me and they will rise up when we need it. As a black person, I'm a minority and I'm grateful for the current level of support.

Of course OP. Why the hell should anyone care so much about the 400 years of structural and institutionalised racism that has been taken place? Why should we be angry at the racism that has led to countless innocent deaths of black people by the police whose job it is to keep them safe? The most recent being an innocent man who had his neck kneeled on for almost 9 minutes while he screamed out to people around him begging for his life. Did you know about the 7 year old girl who was shot dead by a police office? She was murdered because she was sitting on her black fathers lap. The cop assumed her father "looked like someone they were after" so he just shot the poor man's daughter. That's just a couple examples. But you know, how dare they FINALLY be getting heard because what about all the poor white women? If you can't realise that right now racism towards black people is a serious, global issue that needs addressing and everyone's main focus than you need to go an educate yourself because your thread is extremely insensitive, ignorant and downright offensive.

Oh and I'm BAME woman and I have faced more issues in my life because of my skin colour than my sex.

You must be a massive social influencer with hundreds of followers

OP they’re two separate issues, both extremely important. BLM is getting the focus right now because of the George Floyd murder, which has particularly shocked everyone because it was filmed, so people have actually watched the racist act first hand. It also came in quick succession after two other murders of unarmed Black people by white men with guns. People had had enough.

I agree with you that in general there should be equal marches about women’s deaths but a) we do actually have women’s marches, all over the world; and b) now is not the time to bring it up as it distracts from BLM, which is pretty urgent right now, particularly in the USA.

Once things start progressing with justice for black people I actually think the feminist movement could learn a lot from how the BLM movement are doing things at the moment. But let’s just hope it doesn’t take a woman’s death being filmed to galvanise the next push for women’s equality.

which is pretty urgent right now, particularly in the USA.

Actually it's very urgent in the UK too. Look up prison statistics for a start racism is alive and well in the UK, people particularly on Mumsnet like to pretend it isn't though. If the police here were armed they would also be murdering innocent black people.

But let’s just hope it doesn’t take a woman’s death being filmed to galvanise the next push for women’s equality.

This is the sad truth. The protests and attention on BLM movement only happened because a brutal murder got filmed. So many others were ignored and nobody cared about then, sadly that's what it had to take for people to care about the BLM movement. Clearly that should be enough to the OP to justify why the movement currently deserves more attention and focus than women's rights movements.

*Why next week or next month?
*
Why not last week or last month? That's the real question. Why when another oppressed group is having their voices finally heard chose to need a turn on the soap box. It's in use.

I'm also concerned due to the high proportionality of members from the BAME community due to COVID

I've just reread your OP and noticed this again. So you're scared of black people because of Covid? Only BAME people can get it and spread it? It's becoming clearer why you 'got it wrong' on blackout Tuesday and think that your issues are more important than those of millions of BAME people every single day.

Try doing some research on Justine Diamond.

Difference is women wouldn't be reckless enough to protest during a pandemic.

Plus, we'd probably all be called Karens ...

Generally wondering where the support has been for women for the last three years

If this is the nonsense you post on social media then I'm not surprised you're being harassed.

Have you been living under a rock????

There were active and loud protests for women under the banner of #metoo in 2017.

November 2017

www.theguardian.com/world/2017/nov/12/metoo-march-hollywood-sexual-assault-harassment

Timeline of MeToo

www.refinery29.com/en-us/2018/10/212801/me-too-movement-history-timeline-year-weinstein

#MeToo impact around the world

www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2020/05/08/metoo-around-the-world/?arc404=true

If you'd read the thread you will see that I have been clear that I havent posted anything on SM apart from Black Out Tuesday which I was told I did wrong (turns out I actually did it correctly according to this thread).

@Freezerrr that must be really difficult, i do hope this movement can make a difference to many people.

@Ohtherewearethen Yes, I am worried large gathering of the BAME community (mainly) increase their risk of getting covid. I have been shielding for 13 weeks (clearly stated in my OP that I was shielding).

This is a very confusing argument. You seem angry about being attacked for supporting BLM because you're a woman (???) Surely it's just a simple as ignoring the few comments and getting on with life. You seem quite angry and resentful that BAME people are getting attention at the moment whereas you're not getting the same attention for talking about what qualifies you for discrimination. You're using "concern" as a way to conceal disdain for the BLM protests because they go against covid rules that you've been following but have not received a pat on the back for.

Whatever risk protesters expose themselves to is honestly negated by the government cock-ups regarding lockdown times, testing and contact tracing. Businesses and schools will be reopening anytime now so it's not going to make a huge difference. If you belong to a high-risk group then it's still your own responsibility to avoid infection. In many countries (eg Germany, Austria, Denmark) lockdown has ended over a month ago so plenty of protests have taken place legally.

OP, if your response to BLM is “why don’t women matter” you are
a) engaging in whataboutery
b) ignoring that 50% of BLM means black women
c) are either being disingenuous or just haven’t thought things through.

Difference is women wouldn't be reckless enough to protest during a pandemic.

Eh? Loads of women have taken part in the BLM protests globally!

I've just reread your OP and noticed this again. So you're scared of black people because of Covid? Only BAME people can get it and spread it?

To be fair to OP, I think she meant that she felt those protesting may be at more risk of getting it and becoming ill not that they would spread it. More that she was concerned they were doing something that made them vulnerable. While I've disagreed vocally with OP on lots of stuff I think this was a misunderstanding of what she meant - as it read a little ambiguously.

Op - if people are bullying you on social media then unfriend them. If they are your actual friends then maybe you need better friends.