All lives matter

[Scoobyboob]

I’ve disabled voting because today has been a lot already! I can’t deal with seeing another such stark display in % or how few people support BLM.
Is there a black Mumsnet section? I could do with somewhere to discuss race with other BAME people and Allies that doesn’t get hijacked with

•all lives matter
•what about...
•I’m oppressed too
•white people are suffering as well
•if black people would just...

Happy to hear suggestions for other forums as well. I don’t think Mumsnet is standing against racism, so i’m happy to flounce to get what I need. Which certainly isn’t the silencing of black voices whilst overt racism goes unchecked!

Hi Justine 👋 and fuck off Karen!

I agree with all you’ve said OP. Although, I am white. It’s disgusting that a percentage of complete ignoramus mners are making people feel this way. Some of the responses and views have made my blood boil.

This explains why "all lives matter" is nithing but deflective bullshit. Saying "all lives matter" as a response to "black lives matter" is like my three year old telling me that her sibling has eaten the last biscuit as a way of distracting me from the fact she has shit her pants.

@BankofNook did you read my post?

I’m thoroughly cringing every time I read “but all lives matter”.

I did and I'm agreeing with it.

BankofNook was agreeing with you

@bankofnook sorry, I wasn’t sure if my title had made you think I was another racist twat who needed a cartoon drawing to grasp a fairly simple concept!

YANBU. Anyone prefacing a response to "black lives matter" with "but" is essentially whining that they don't want the focus to be on removing barriers for black people. Nothing more.

Absolutely Black Lives Matter. I speak as an Ally but if people can't see what's going on and bleat about 'whatifery' I don't want to hear them. Their protests are such straw man arguments they're going to be used in the next remake of The Wicker Man.

@Scoobyboob yes girl please call me when they set up BAMumsnet. I’m so so tired.

Tombstoners lives do matter - why they did what they did in Dorset, I don't understand

I try my best to be an ally and I have been pretty shocked to see some of the views on here today quite frankly. I’ve been here less and less lately and I really think the ignorance will be the final straw for me.

It’s so depressing

Some people seem to think that support for black people means that you’re anti-white

Worst thing is “not this again” / “I’ve experienced racism as a white person” / “what about black on black crime”

A BAME section is a fantastic idea, though I'm not sure how white nonsense could be prevented.

I am trying my hardest to be an ally, and for me, that means shutting up, giving space to black voices, and educating myself without expecting a black person to do it for me.

I am calling out 'whatiffery' and 'but...' whenever I see it.

I'm disgusted we need 'black lives matter'. Every life matters, and needing to specify 'black lives'- and we do need to specify it- is to the shame on all of us. I dislike the phrase because it's so shameful we need to say it.

It damn well should be uncomfortable and if you feel that, don't argue it, feel the shame.

I agree. I'm white and have worked in roles related to diversity for a while. I'd like to hope I have good knowledge and I'm an ally but accept I've always got more to learn. I'm interested in politics and social politics. I'm an artist and work with communities and awareness of oppression is a big part of my work.

My mental health isn't great at the moment so have been limiting my exposure to news coverage. I understand even this it's self is a privilege. I don't spend loads of time on here so haven't seen the what aboutery. So sorry this is happening here and I can only imagine how exhausted you are. Sending love and support.

I would personally love to here from BAME people here. But understand that constant battle is exhausting.

Well, hispanics are treated really poorly in the US and I wonder who is advocating for them.

I don’t think all lives matter means that white people are important too. I think it’s a way of saying that many people in this world are marginalized and brutalized and wouldn’t it be great to live in a society without prejudice and with social justice for all. However, I think that message has gone and all people see is rich white privileged folk complaining, so I don’t share that viewpoint usually.

I hope I’m not speaking or of turn here, but I do think a BAME section would be really good idea. I can’t imagine how it feels to be singled out or judged on the colour of your skin. The closest I can relate, is the fear of growing up in (NI) during the troubles and fearing that I or a loved one was a target, because of our religion. I’ve lost close family members because they were the ‘wrong’ religion/job. However, I still had the benefit of being able to walk through a crowd of people without someone ‘seeing’ my religion, so I know it’s not the same.

I am able to talk to other parents/siblings of those with disabled children, in the section for those dealing with disabilities. Anyone who tries to tell us that they exactly know how it is, because their neighbour has a disabled child and we should do XYZ is told to wise up and clear off. If Mumsnet can provide a section for us, then I don’t see why they can’t provide a BAME section.

I promise I won’t pop over and tell you I know how how you feel or that you should do XYZ.

Some people cannot accept being at the margin of society’s gaze. The world is looking at black tragedy and these fools need to say “but what about white people? Why aren’t we the centre of attention?”

The mentality behind this behaviour is quite scary to me honestly.

I was reluctant to look at your post OP, in case you were one of those "all lives matter", a relief reading your post.

I have read up and watched in horror the scenes unfolding in the US. I have cried and felt utter anger. As a white woman, having taken time to reflect, I think I have been utterly naive and ignorant. I have friends of different races and religions, and I haven't taken the deliberate time to consider how their experiences differ from mine. I'm ashamed to say I have been one of those 'well there's no way I'm a racist, some of my best friends are black / brown'. I know now this is not enough.

I'm not sure what the feeling is when I see people protesting, but it's akin to pride, I just cry.

This is the first time I have been on Mumsnet for a few days, I had to stay away after reading the 'to think people protesting are mad' and saw the racism, and utter inability to see beyond some posters own privilege. Ive read a quote quite a lot : 'privilege is when you think something is not a problem because it's a not a problem to you personally'.

I also won’t tell you that ‘all lives matter’ because that’s patronising, deflective bullshite that tries to minimise what many BAME people are going through.

*Well, hispanics are treated really poorly in the US and I wonder who is advocating for them.

I don’t think all lives matter means that white people are important too. I think it’s a way of saying that many people in this world are marginalized and brutalized and wouldn’t it be great to live in a society without prejudice and with social justice for all. However, I think that message has gone and all people see is rich white privileged folk complaining, so I don’t share that viewpoint usually.*

🤦‍♀️ you're not getting it. Yes Hispanics are treated badly, women are treated badly, Muslims are treated badly... the list goes on. But BLM is about Black People!
Ffs it's like seeing someone advocating for women's aid and saying "well sometimes men are subject to domestic abuse". Yes they are but it doesn't detract from the need for women's aid does it?
If you're worried about another issue then start a movement about that, don't jump on someone else's bandwagon and try to downplay their suffering by saying 'but, but, but'

I don't think there should be a BAME section. It's vital to have these discussions in the open regardless of many ignorant people or the racist ones. Everyone needs to be able to see this and who knows? The ignorant one today will become the ally tomorrow. I'm an ally but I wasn't always one, I've learned and still learning but wouldn't have done so if there was an obscure BAME thread people rarely visit except to talk about niche topics (that should really be a humanity topic). Let's persevere please.

I totally agree with you OP. The same as men can't appreciate what women have to tolerate their whole lives, white people have no idea what it's like to be BAME.

And I say this as a white woman.