To ask about cooking cheap frozen children in a slow cooker?

[TheShining]

most. Boring. Thread. Ever

DS accidentally put a pack of frozen beasts into the oven overnight, instead of the freezer.

They were still half frozen when I discovered them.

Will they be ok in the slow cooker? Or will I give them food poisoning?

@MRex

Pizza pre ordered for sinner BTW. Why did you order it just for the sinner like it's punishment? I think you ought to order pizza for the whole family TBH, not everybody likes the taste of cheap children but everybody likes pizza.

Oh for the sake of fucking peanut butter FUCK!!! 🙉

@Lockdownlooks

What’s the country of origin OP? I’ve heard that Swedes are good for Sweet and sour, maybe and some cod if they are Welsh for a fish stew. (Just look out for the BFG )

I love that movie! One of my friends' NN for me is the BFG (I'm 4'9.5 and weigh about 12lb 😂)

@MNHQ please can we have this in classics if Only for the title 😂🤦‍♀️

Heard they cook better in a banmarie than slow cooker though OP

Found it.

Same fucking theme too!

(Ps, if any of you happen to be on my Facebook friends list, let me know 😂)

I love that movie! One of my friends' NN for me is the BFG (I'm 4'9.5 and weigh about 12lb 😂)

I prefer the cookbook to the screen version - more detailed recipes.

I used to think Banmarie was a kids' TV show. (I was thinking of Belamory).

Children and beasts were funny autocorrects but by autocunts it was obvious op was doing it on purpose.

I usually defrost in microwave first. If too late for that they will just need longer to cook through on a slow cooker. A quick fry on each side and cut in chunks will help. As long as they are cooked through and hot not just warm they should be fine

@AlpineSnow

Children and beasts were funny autocorrects but by autocunts it was obvious op was doing it on purpose.

Autocunt was on purpose. It's what I call my autocorrect.

I wouldn't use a slow cooker. If you put them in at the end of a stressful day to wake up to a cooked breakfast, you might seriously regret the decision!

@2Rebecca

I usually defrost in microwave first. If too late for that they will just need longer to cook through on a slow cooker. A quick fry on each side and cut in chunks will help. As long as they are cooked through and hot not just warm they should be fine

I usually defrost in the microwave too. We got the shopping yesterday, and I knew I was using them today- I asked him to put them in the fridge to save wrestling with all the random shite in the freezer. Next time I'll wrestle 😂

I hope they aren't chlorinated children, OP!

Ime you have to cook children quickly, otherwise the feckers climb out of the pot.

DS accidentally put a pack of frozen beasts into the oven overnight

Thank you, OP. Needed a laugh today! And to the poster who asked how big your slow cooker is

If the children are beasts they deserve to be Cooked IMO. Only confused about whether the pizza for the sinner is for them, to fatten them up pre cooking - or for you as an additional course, since you may be considered a sinner for cooking the children...

"Cheap frozen children in a slow cooker" hmmm, that got me opening up your thread. But I dont recommend re-freezing thawed/part thawed things, especially if meat.

We get our frozen children from Waitrose and they are privately educated. Just taste better that way.

It specifically says on the packaging they must be defrosted overnight in the summerhouse before cooking.

Hey OP are you the Enormous Crocodile?
Do you have secret plans and clever tricks?

@MNHQ I second this thread for classics!

@Piffle11

Thank you, OP. Needed a laugh today! And to the poster who asked how big your slow cooker is

And i answered, as if it was a serious question! 😂

They will probably be delicious OP, but could you eat a whole one?

One of mine is privately educated and the other attends a special school rather than mainstream....will they require different cooking times? I wouldn’t say either are beasts though - they’re both quite pleasant most of the time - so will I need to alter the cooking temperature to take this into account?

Quentin Blake could draw some amazing pictures based on this thread.