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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have I fucked up at work?

135 replies

millerjane · 15/05/2020 15:00

So on my internal comms I noticed there was someone with the exact surname as me. My dad is Sri Lankan so our surname is very ...um...specific. I just messaged someone on IM saying "HI never knew I shared my surname with anyone else" (I was VERY bored)

It's really inappropriate/unecessary. How inappropriate was this?

OP posts:
QuestionableMouse · 15/05/2020 15:02

Bit weird but it's not like you sent a dick pic or something.

GreenOliveTree · 15/05/2020 15:03

Ha this made me smile! I have an unusual surname but there are 3 of us in the (large) organisation where I work, I'm often tempted to do the same. Not been brave (or bored!) Enough to do it though Smile

zscaler · 15/05/2020 15:03

I wouldn’t worry about it - I wouldn’t think twice if one of my colleagues messaged me something like this. I think you’re overthinking!

goodwinter · 15/05/2020 15:03

It's not inappropriate at all! Slightly unnecessary, sure.. but not something to get worked up about.

Vampyress · 15/05/2020 15:04

I agree that you are overthinking it :) nothing wrong with it at all imo!

Olabeaches · 15/05/2020 15:05

Unless they took offence (which surely they wouldn't have?!) I'm sure they're not going to report you. Would you report someone if they did it to you?

lastqueenofscotland · 15/05/2020 15:07

Bit weird but you’ve not fucked up.

lanthanum · 15/05/2020 15:10

I was tempted to do it once when working in a very large organisation - there were three of us with the same surname - one was my DH's cousin, but we didn't know who the other was.

Happynow001 · 15/05/2020 15:10

Was it to the CEO? 🤭

JunoJigglewick · 15/05/2020 15:22

I did that before. Wasn't a problem.

BusterTheBulldog · 15/05/2020 15:24

Also used to have an unusual surname and totally get this, sure the person does too!

mynameiscalypso · 15/05/2020 15:26

It's fine! It's a Friday afternoon during lockdown; most people are bored out of their minds!

GrumpyHoonMain · 15/05/2020 15:28

I get this a lot at work - they’ll be flattered and you may make a workplace friend!

HopeYouStepOnALego · 15/05/2020 15:29

One of your peers - don't give it another thought.

The CEO? Best start looking for another job now Grin

Sciurus83 · 15/05/2020 15:30

I would think this utterly charming, I hope when I go back to my computer it's me and you have messaged me. Except I'm not Sri Lankan so it's unlikely, still the point stands

HollowTalk · 15/05/2020 15:31

I would definitely do this!

Cattermole · 15/05/2020 15:32

I used to use a very specific historical quote in my email signature. (from the Putney Debates, on universal suffrage) and someone complained to my manager. Neither he nor I never did get to the bottom of what was so appalling about universal suffrage. I also once ended up having a properly weird conversation with a senior civil servant about whether I was the Cattermole who did a particular unrelated to work thing. Yes, I said warily, that's me. Oh said blokey I LOVE that thing! and had my passwords to the reporting system we were taking about, reset to reflect the thing.
Everybody else's are things like moonlight and unicorns, mine is related to Oliver bloody Cromwell. Humph.

Want2beme · 15/05/2020 15:33

I've got a very unusual surname, and I'd be delighted if someone with the same surname contacted me to comment on it, either at work or SM. You never know, you might turn out to be related.

StuckInnTheMiddle · 15/05/2020 15:34

I did this once years ago (my Dads Indian with an unusual surname) and it turned out he was a distant cousin. Me and dh are now really good friends with him and his dw and our kids go to the same school. We hang out together all the time!

KobeWan · 15/05/2020 15:36

A lady with the same first and last name as me started a Facebook group for anyone who had the same name. There were only three or four of us in it. It died a death when people got married and changed their surnames.

amusedbush · 15/05/2020 15:39

When I was 18 I worked at a large company's HQ and I had an unusual surname. Nothing too out there, but it wasn't everyday.

A middle aged man I didn't know saw my name on the directory and actually went to the trouble of coming up to my team's floor and asking people who I was, just to tell me to my face that my name "sounds like a porn star name".

THAT was inappropriate for work.

burnoutbabe · 15/05/2020 15:41

i'd think it was fine

and you are bound to get emails for one another over the time anyway!

AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter · 15/05/2020 15:42

Its absolutely fine.

You are way overthinking this- as PP have said, its not like you sent a naked photo! dont worry!

feebeecat · 15/05/2020 15:42

I apparently have a very common name (thanks dh) there are seven of us within the organisation. Often get each other’s emails, so have got to know each other over the years. No idea about grades, never looked, we all just think it’s quite funny 🤷‍♀️

Iwalkinmyclothing · 15/05/2020 15:42

There is no one else in the country with the same firstname/ surname combination as me and afaik there are fewer than 10 of us in the country with this surname at all. I'd be very happy if someone joined the company, realised we shared a surname and sent me a message pointing it out :)