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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have I fucked up at work?

135 replies

millerjane · 15/05/2020 15:00

So on my internal comms I noticed there was someone with the exact surname as me. My dad is Sri Lankan so our surname is very ...um...specific. I just messaged someone on IM saying "HI never knew I shared my surname with anyone else" (I was VERY bored)

It's really inappropriate/unecessary. How inappropriate was this?

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 15/05/2020 16:27

It's fine! I have a super unusual surname too, only about 350 in the world, so I would probably do the same!

Carolduckingbaskin · 15/05/2020 16:30

My maiden name was really unusual - there are under 200 of us in the world. I remember Mentioning it at work and a man said “funny I knew another (insert name here so it can’t be that rare” ... the man in question was my uncle.

CoralFish · 15/05/2020 16:33

Why do you think it is inappropriate? Did they say this?

CurlyhairedAssassin · 15/05/2020 16:42

Blimey, everyone needs some light relief at the moment, this would have made the other person smile, I'm sure.

It could also prove useful if there are ever any mix ups with you receiving their communications by mistake or vice versa.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 15/05/2020 16:44

Just remembered, some members of my family have a very unusual maiden name. A patient read my relative's staff name badge on a hospital visit and commented on it, and because of that very soon after we discovered a long lost relative! (half sister of my relatives) and they ended up meeting up. If that patient had just kept quiet they would never have found each other.

MouthBreathingRage · 15/05/2020 16:47

Is it wise to be sharing your very unusual surname on here? Consider the vast amount of information you've shared about yourself over the past few weeks, you might want to be careful that it's not outing. If that's something you care about, of course Smile.

Zaphodsotherhead · 15/05/2020 16:51

I have a fairly unusual surname (was always told that all those of us with it are related, albeit distantly, but then that's probably true of being related distantly to the rest of the human race...) and I LOVE it when someone gets in touch on Twitter or Facebook to say we share a name!

In fact, I am in contact with a Reverend on Twitter, who lives in Canada with the same surname. We reckon we are related about two generations back but haven't investigated where yet.

EggysMom · 15/05/2020 16:55

In a company of 35,000 I am the only person with my surname. If another person joined, I would probably email them to work out where in the family tree we are joined Grin

TheMotherofAllDilemmas · 15/05/2020 16:55

I would be delighted to be contacted by any one who have a surname from my country. That’s at least how I have met more expats. Having said that, some third generation immigrants may find it a little bit strange 🙂

FTstepmum · 15/05/2020 16:56

I think it's rather lovely! I'd be well happy to receive an email from a fellow rare-surname-sharer.

AllTheUserNamesAreTaken · 15/05/2020 16:58

I’ve got an unusual (in the UK) first name and have never met anyone with the same name so I would most probably have done the same in your situation (after snooping the intranet to make sure it wasn’t the CEO!)

Hunnybears · 15/05/2020 17:08

It just shows your personable. I wouldn’t give it a second thought!

Hunnybears · 15/05/2020 17:09

I put kisses on my emails sometimes 😳

rosesandcashmere · 15/05/2020 17:13

I wouldn't mind! If my surname was unusual, mine isn't so that would be weird

Marshmallow91 · 15/05/2020 17:21

Not inappropriate at all. I think there's only maybe 10 other people with my surname worldwide and none in the UK so it'd be pretty happy to have someone in my company message me for that reason. Wouldn't respond during working hours though in case I was thought to be slacking off WinkGrin

Runnerduck34 · 15/05/2020 17:23

Don't worry I don't think you did anything wrong, it probably made them smile, forget it!

Disfordarkchocolate · 15/05/2020 17:24

Stop worrying. It's nice and friendly.

LaurieMarlow · 15/05/2020 17:26

It’s fine. Relax.

ChangeOfName2020 · 15/05/2020 17:27

I'd be touched if someone sent something like that to me at work, I think it's a nice thing to do.

The Jack Osborn comment made me laugh. I too have added someone on Facebook with the same name as me just for the sake of it and we became virtual friends Grin

KaleJuicer · 15/05/2020 17:28

Gosh I came on here thinking you'd done something horrific. That was sweet; hope you get a reply but don't give it a moment's thought if you don't hear back.

Amber0685 · 15/05/2020 17:28

It's cute.

millymaid · 15/05/2020 17:31

I don't see what the big deal is, I think it's kind of friendly.

P999 · 15/05/2020 17:40

It's friendly and can't imagine why anyone would take offence. Your workplace sounds quite uptight place for you to be worrying!

ambereeree · 15/05/2020 17:45

Is it only your dad who's Sri Lankan? I ask that because whenever non English see other non English from the same heritage as them its normal to ask. Surely you know this OP?? Grin it's the secret code.

BlueJava · 15/05/2020 17:51

No it's fine! I also have an unusual surname, I have connected with a few ppl of the same name. When I was working as a consultant in a bank once a guy once messaged me as we had the same name. We've stayed connected since. Don't overthink it!