AIBU - living in England completely insufferable?

[hellosunshine5]

As per the title really, I loved living here for a few years but I now just find the whole country completely insufferable.

Does anyone else feel the same?

For what it’s worth, I’m English and was born here to English parents who then emigrated to NZ when I was 8. Lived over there until I returned to England when I was 20 to get to know my extended family and have an adventure etc. I ended up meeting someone and settling - South East for reference.

Fast forward 7 years and I am really struggling to tolerate life here any longer. I’m making plans to leave, but they’re obviously on hold for the foreseeable.

My reasons?

• I work hard in a fairly well paid job that I commute to in London, but I can still only reasonably afford to live in a tiny one bedroom apartment with no outside space. I see my friends from back home in similar financial situations buying 4 bedroom new build family homes with massive gardens.

• England is over crowded. I find it unbearable to have to circle my local supermarket car park multiple times (whatever time of the day) to find a space. Such simple things in life shouldn’t be so difficult.

• I hate the competitiveness of life over here. Everyone trying to have the newest car, the best holidays, the nicest house, the best schools for their kids, even if they can’t actually afford it. I think people elsewhere in the world are much more humble and happy with their lot.

So, AIBU? Are you genuinely happy living here? Appreciate it’s a difficult question for those that have never lived elsewhere.

That's not my experience. If I won the lottery (unlikely as I don't play) I would buy a Toyota Yaris. I love my lot.

No. Over the last 5 years I have become more and more despondent living here. I find it very hard to meet similar minded people and the selfishness, greed and anger I see on a daily basis makes me feel so sad. I have found it even worse over the last few weeks. Many (not all) people being even more selfish and unable to see things from other people’s points of view. I will stay here as for various reasons have no choice. It may be the same across the world - I don’t know. But it makes me very sad to think of a whole world as arrogant and greedy as many of the people I meet in the U.K.

I don't have a problem with it. I lived in NZ for a couple of years (South island) and still have family there. I couldn't cope with feeling so far from everything.

I now live in the SE.

I don't commute to London. I have a nice career in the nearest city which I cycle to.

I rarely drive to the supermarket but don't have problems parking when I do.

People might say what they're doing about holidays etc but it doesn't appear to be a competition, just chit chat. I don't think the people I know are much different to any other people in the west - I think Nz is probably different because it is so far from anywhere else to go 'away' to, it seems a much bigger deal.

I love it here, love it.

I love living in the uk. It's beautiful. I like my friends.

I think you're talking about London. England has lots of other places that are less crowded and with cheaper housing.

I love it here. We spend part of every year in Australia but I never mind coming home.

I have to add that we spend a lot of time in Wales too and are really missing it at the moment.

I hate it as well and am thinking of leaving. Everyone lives on top of each other which exacerbates the selfishness and lack of respect for others.

I think that competitiveness is something you either engage with or don’t. It’s a choice. Some will have more, Some less.

I agree it’s over crowded and lack of space can be very difficult

YANBU. I’m just ashamed to be English at the moment. The govt is inept, tens of thousands are dying unnecessarily. And of course Brexit which was won by lying and cheating.
If I could I’d emigrate but I wouldn’t want to leave my family.

Of course you aren't being unreasonable, everyone's entitled to their own opinion. It sounds like you're making plans to change your life, why does it matter what others think, will it change your mind?

Your problem is London, not England.

England is certainly overcrowded with cars and their entitled drivers. So shop differently and you won't be part of the car parking problem.

It sounds like you are talking Bout London and the suburbs, I live in the east (a bit north of you probably) and it's rural and just lovely, certainly not overcrowded. Perhaps look into moving into a more rural area first.

London is a dump.

A hell hole and ridiculously over populated with 9 million people living there alone.

FWIW I'm a born and bred Londoner.

Moved away 12 years ago.

I know plenty of gorgeous places in England and London isn't one of them.

Don't live near London then? I have literally none of those issues and I live and work in England.

YANBU hate english culture, not compatible with me. Only good thing in UK is tge financial side, if not for it we would be gone years ago. Feel stuck here tbh.

Very rude and unreasonable to say living in England is insufferable.

If you don’t like it you’re free to go elsewhere is the politest response.

Nothing wrong with preferring NZ to London and SE, we’re all entitled to preferences and there is a massive difference. Lots of really lovely places to live in England too.

I live near Cambridge. Absolutely hate it. Ridiculously overcrowded and expensive.

I'd move away in a heartbeat.

I dont get what the AIBU is? If you don't like it, do something about it. Other people are very happy, you are not - but what has it got to do with AIBU or did you just want to start yet another England/Britain bashing thread?

You're talking about a very small area within an entire country.

I live in East Yorkshire. It is nothing like what you've described. Absolutely not overcrowded. Loads of space. Properties are generally affordable. And the supermarket is busy if there are more than about 20 people in it. It is glorious, I love it.

Don't tar everywhere with the same brush.

I live in London and don't recognise anything in your post

I think either you need to change your own mindset or maybe you are hanging out with the wrong people if you have a sense of life being a competition. I live in London and have a group of friends whose ‘lots’ in life vary quite a lot (albeit, I admit, none who truly struggle financially), but there’s no sense of keeping up with others or lording it if better off.

It sounds very much like you are comparing your lot to what your friends have and find yourself wanting. Not Britain's fault. Move to where you will be happy.

Sounds like you're homesick.

We've moved back to England last summer after 4 years abroad. It's silly things that makes England home for us... And that's what you're missing at the moment, but for NZ. And England feeling small after a country with a lot more space and lot less people is natural.

I feel no homesickness for London though. Ice decided I like the 'North' a lot more (currently in Lincolnshire, so not really North, but might as well be a million miles North the way some people think!)