Too fat for sex

[lindsay2900]

Does anyone feel like this if you're over 18st? I was 16st in December, now 19st I find sex so difficult now being this size, feel fat and sometimes claustrophobic when on my back. When I was 16st, I was fine. Could easily move around.

I imagine a long cock is helpful when over a certain size, maybe you need to change your lover not your weight

It's not easy to suggest positions that accommodate all of those issues is it?

Isn’t it really the man’s job to figure that out since he’s the one who has to get “it” in there. If he wants to get “it” some action he will surely use his full brainpower to figure out a solution for her

Isn’t it really the man’s job to figure that out since he’s the one who has to get “it” in there. If he wants to get “it” some action he will surely use his full brainpower to figure out a solution for her

Figuring out how to sex successfully should be done by both partners Communication and working through issues together is a must in a relationship.

Also. It's a penis. You can say that, you don't have to do "it" in commas

The idea of the sex swings that so many MNers must have is going to have me smiling for a day.

@EasyPleasey 🤣. It's not me, it's you......

Weight loss is not just about diet and exercise though is it? It’s about childhood, love, self love, self esteem, feelings of worthiness, fear

Nope, weight loss is about diet and exercise. That's all it's about. All the other things you mention might make it harder for you, or explain why you're overweight in the first place.

But weight loss.....that's about diet and exercise.

After some advice, been with my BF 4 years we have 1 child over 3. Since being pregnant there has been zero or very little physical connection between us. We live together and get on relatively well 99% of the time. Recently there’s been mor arguments than normal due to complete lack of anything physical. I have said in a few arguments I feel we are more like brother and sister than in a relationship. Every time I try to discuss it causes an argument, he says he still finds me attractive but it’s just awkward. Physique wise I’m in similar condition to when we met and things were a lot better physically. I’m just wondering if I’m wasting time trying to sort this when clearly there’s something lacking and BF just can not discuss without an argument. I am unhappy currently and feel that in the long term this will not work unless we can drastically change things but that can’t be done when every conversation turns into an argument.
Worth also noting he does not want anymore children and I do ...
so long term our goals aren’t the same

OP I hope you find a way to enjoy your sex life again soon. It’s great that you have up until this point and hopefully if you keep trying positions and using cushions and pillows to help, you will find one. The idea of a swing sounded fun!

On the other hand I don’t understand the accusations of fatphobia and the outrage that people might have suggested losing weight. The title of the post is “too fat to have sex“. There is no height under 6ft 7 where being 19stone is not obese or actually dangerously clinically obese. There is a huge difference between embracing being curvy and loving different body shapes and then pretending that at some point a person isn’t exceeding the limits to what a human is physically capable of weighing and still being mobile, I’m sorry I know that sounds very harsh but it’s not even a couple of stones overweight. When people talk about not being able to lie on their back, not being able to find dicks for fuck sake, then suggesting weight loss is not fatphobia. Surely the answer is to try and get back to the weight where someone doesn’t feel that by lying on their back they are suffocating themselves?!

If someone said I’m trying to make chicken soup but I’ve just chopped my finger off I feel like on MN you’d get flamed for replying “well let’s start by fixing that finger”.

Ffs, I hope you have babies and pack the weight on.

Why?

@Dontsaykwen exactly.

Isn’t it really the man’s job to figure that out since he’s the one who has to get “it” in there. If he wants to get “it” some action he will surely use his full brainpower to figure out a solution for her

Sorry, what? It's the op who wants to have sex. Why's it up to the man to figure out how to make it possible?

OP is not only too fat for sex but also for pretty much any of the types of physical activity that for millennia been taken for granted as a must for human survival. Her level of obesity is unique to 'Western' societies starting in the very late twentieth century, and remains almost unheard of on most of the planet. it can only be sustained with an absurd calorie intake that has historically sustained two people or even entire families. the advice to find a partner with a freakishly long penis is not helpful.

I'm sure you can find other positions, though long-term it won't be a solution most physical activities will become to difficult. I'm afraid to say your only solution is to trim a little.

Oh why did millenials post taking about the op getting oral while stuffing her face with chips get deleted?

It showed exactly what she was like.

I also see someone has reported my post pointing out what an utterly vile thing that was to say. Pathetic.

@rattusrattus20 I don't think that's 100% true. I'm just over 18st (I am actively trying to loose weight and have done well so far). I am increasingly active, I jog, I dance, I have done trampolining, swimming, can do cartwheels and handstands can run up and down the stairs and can have sex in pretty much any position going (flexibility and hight allowing). It is not a one size fits all scenario and to categorise it as such is plain wrong.

*incredibly

Oh why did millenials post taking about the op getting oral while stuffing her face with chips get deleted? Wow I missed the comment.

Millenial wasn't attacking an op with it tho. As I understood it it was aimed at other people. However, it shouldn't be here. It was quite harsh and easy to take the wrong way.

That's because someone had it deleted and also my post saying it was clear how she actually felt about things.

Or actually mine may have been deleted because it quoted her.

And so the next one will be deleted too.

It's a shame as her other posts stand and so people can't see what she actually thinks.

Op. What positions have you tried? And what are your partner's measurements? Weight and length

Weight and length

Please tell me you meant height and not expected OP to publicly put up her partner's penis length...😂

Nope. The image I have in my head suggests length is important!

That's just plain wrong