Neighbours son with autism and all-day verbal stimming.

[MonkeyJunk]

I know I am being unreasonable, but I am also slightly losing my mind.

Our neighbour has a son who has autism and who screams as part of this (I believe). He spends each day from around 7am until darkness in the garden doing this, and I think he does it when he is inside as well. Unfortunately any movement (us, children, animals) seems to be a trigger.

He does also do this in the house but because of the way our houses are designed and because they are the end of terrace house we cannot hear it (and nobody else can).

I get it is really, really, really shit for her, but it is now becoming relentless. All day, every day when the weather is good - it means our home is not very peaceful at all and we cannot enjoy our garden at all (he seems to go into a much more shrill scream when there's movement in our garden). We've stopped feeding the birds and are letting the dog out the front yard when it needs to go out.

I know lockdown is tough, and the mother must be finding it very difficult, but it's having a huge impact on us and our family life - particularly not being able to enjoy our garden, being woken up and the kids struggling to sleep at night (we've now moved them into the front bedroom to try and minimise this).

WIBU to ask if her son can please be inside by seven pm and for some hours during the day so we can go into and enjoy our garden?

Oh well better late than never. I was just trying to help. I know a family with an autistic child and I know how hard it is for them.

Sparkles ,the Op.said pages and pages ago tis was the approach she was going to take

I realise that now, I didnt have time earlier to read the whole 22 pages 🙄

People are calling it screaming because that’s what the op said originally.
In the original post.
Nobody without experience of asd knows what stimming is, ergo, on a general public forum the majority is likely to continue with the word screaming as that is our common parlance.

I don't mind people saying screaming my child shout ,s or screams or he did this trait appears to have diminished for us the op.see!s sympathetic qhowever a lot of posters less so.

One of my children is autistic with a PDA profile and has challenging behaviour. She has found lockdown very hard so far and has started "screaming" as some of you may see it or "stimming" as we see it. It isn't pleasant at all - for her or us. She is overloaded sensory wise and it's fight or flight response. I would be mortified if someone put a note through my door. Cake or no cake... I think the mum will feel shit enough as she will probably feel like nothing is working and like for many of us there has been no respite in lockdown whatsoever. I am beyond exhausted - the sleep that we had before lockdown was bad enough and now it has become a couple of hours a night as my dd is so anxious. I get where you are coming from op but trust me the mum will already feel shit and she will be doing the best she can. Re your garden I would put screening up to stop perhaps the trigger.

So call it stimming?

Not all vocal stimming is screaming. Screaming gets across what it sounds like.

It seems that disability is a soft target for many. This sort of thread would have been pulled if it was about a neighbour's gender, sexuality or BAME background. I realise that MN have deleted the worst offenders, but much of it still makes for uncomfortable reading. We can only hope that it will lead to a few pps being more aware, understanding and kinder in future.

I doubt it Ginny I have read many threads of this nature and it always descends into nastiness ,there,s an awful lot of ignorance about Autism.

Not read the thread but I have a noisy ds with ASD. He is not outside all day and stimson less out there as hes normally playing with his sister.

I think you need a word with them but if I was in their shoes I cant think of anyway that if that was our first conversation, I wouldnt feel put out.

They are possibly used to a lot of verbal abuse ( we are) and you get lots of derogatory comments from strangers all the time. It would be better if it wasnt your first conversation

I have a neighbour who has a child in a similar situation. It must be so hard to keep her DS occupied and stimulated in these times. It doesn't bother me as I'm thinking of her child and not my enjoyment of my garden. I feel for their family. She's got it a lot harder than a bit of noise. Please handle it sympathetically. The family may be at the end of their tether.