About H seeking attention during DD’s home schooling video?

[10daysofrain]

Backstory is H has a bit of form for being a performance parent (only attentive or doing any childcare when others are watching.) DD is 6 and is having twice- daily catch ups on work with her class via zoom.

H keeps getting on the screen when he can, either in the background doing something unnecessary and looking to see if he is on the screen, or coming into shot and either doing “antennae” behind DD’s Head or pretending to be a “monster,” often when the class are in the middle of something else. I can see that DD finds it annoying and a bit embarrassing. H thinks as she is quite a shy little girl it takes the attention off her.

I keep telling H off for doing this (and physically batting his hands away when they come up behind DD,) and he is very upset with me and says I “constantly stifle and dismiss” him. I don’t think that’s the case.

I appreciate this sounds like a bit of a weird thread. I don’t know if I am so jaded by H’s behaviour over the years that I am disproportionately irritated by something quite innocent

We actually have had rules sent out from our local education department and your H's behaviour would certainly be in contravention.

Utter knob. Suggest you call the teacher and ask her to tell him to stop disrupting the class. Hopefully that will sink in

How embarrassing for your daughter. Her father sounds like an idiot, is he a bit slow off the mark or are his social skills lacking? It’s also completely inappropriate, like him coming into her classroom at school and acting the clown.

YANBU. I’m surprised the teacher hasn’t said anything! Tell him to stop being weird, he’s not a child he doesn’t need to be attention seeking.

Oh how awful. I can’t bear this sort of attention-seeking. It’s nowhere near witty enough to be funny. It just smacks of desperation. Poor you and your poor daughter.

He's a plonker.
I would definitely do one of two things - either:

1. Contact the teacher and ask him/ her to ask your DH to stop next time he does it
2. Tell him the teacher has been in touch with you saying it's distracting and he's to stop.

What an idiot. I'd be mortified, how does he not realise that he's making a tit of himself?

He sounds like an absolute dick. Please, for your daughter's sake, make him stop NOW. Otherwise she'll see you standing aside and letting him humiliate her.

What a nob. Seriously can you send him out for urgent errand next time a lesson is planned?

Can you set he up with her back against a wall so DH can't come up behind her? Not that you should have to but it might help!

Get the teacher to intervene?

Blur the background so he can’t be seen?

Have DD do the Zoom calls on her bedroom with the door shut?

Not that any of that should be necessary but sounds like he won’t listen to reason.

What a twat.

His logic is strange.

Imagine a normal classroom with his daughter sitting on the floor with all the other kids listening to the teacher. Imagine he then bursts in and starts pulling faces behind her or pretending to be a monster.

How can he think this is NOT drawing attention to her when clearly it's doing the opposite?

And make sure your daughter knows you have got her back.

I sympathise as my DH would do similar hovering in the back ground (no bunny ears though). But he has no social filter due to aspergers

What an utter fuckwit. How mortifying tor your little girl. I’m surprised the teacher hasn’t said anything yet. I’d show him this thread op, if he thinks that it’s just your opinion that asking him not to embarrass your daughter and disrupt her education is ‘stifling’ him

Absolutely unbelievable.

Poor dd in a few years never mind now!

Is he 12? Honestly what a freak. If he's not respecting you telling him to stop you need to retreat to a locked room with your daughter so she can be doing it in peace. I would be so beyond unimpressed with him.

YANBU, what a prat.

What a fucking childish dick your dh is
Your poor daughter

1% say YABU. Is your DH on this thread?!

Oh dear. What wankerly behaviour.
You know your DD’s teacher will be thinking similar. He needs to stop this twat behaviour immediately.

@Nanny0gg

😂 That sounds like the perfect solution.

He sounds an absolute wanker (and I notice you don't call him "D"H

Does he go into her classroom at school and act like a performing seal?

If not, he shouldn't be doing it at home. He is interrupting the lessons both for your child and for others, and it must pee theteachebr off no end.

Could you possibly contact the school and ask for an "official" e-mail to parents not todo this because it is distracting, and interrupts lessons for more than the five minutes he's fannying about because the kids have to get back into learning mode every single time?

No-one singled out, obviously much as you might like too to keep it civil, but he might take notice. You will, of course have to grovel to the school/teacher and explain that you have married a twat, but I expect you're used to that by now, as you have been with him at least seven years.

I don’t know if I am so jaded by H’s behaviour over the years

So he's a prick in other ways and when it affects your child it really hits home?

Tell him the school's told him to stop for safeguarding reasons. Then lock him in the shed for the rest of the lockdown.