DH won't stop playing with himself

[vinoelle]

This is semi light hearted, but this habit has been getting on my nerves in these fractious lock down times.

DH ALWAYS has his hands down his trousers, 'fiddling' with his bits when we are sitting on the sofa. It's not sexual, he isn't masturbating, and isn't erect, but basically the whole time we are watching tv or talking he will just be fiddling with himself, I don't know how else to describe it.

He's done it for years and I've mentioned it a couple of times, he just says he finds it comforting and gets a bit annoyed if I mention it or says I'm nagging. Just recently when we are trapped indoors together it's REALLY started to annoy me and I don't know why. I just find it a bit impolite? I have no issue with him masturbating properly in private, or scratching himself if he has an itch, but he'll just do it for ages and doesn't even have the decency to hide it under a blanket! ARGH. So IABU and a prude?

I say "stop playing with it or it'll fall off" a minimum eleventy billion times a day. My DS is 3 though. He sometimes tells me that he likes playing with his willy, I tell him "that's fine, go and do it in your bed then"

DH occasionally does this but is scrupulously clean and for some reason, it's only ever in the evening. I can't get worked up about it though.

You do things in the appropriate setting surely ? When I’m relaxing at home in my own time, I’ll sometimes sit with my hands down my pants. When I’m at work I’m working. People act in public differently to how they act in private.

I don’t understand why my wife is poor - Like I said if she wanted to do it I really wouldn’t care!!

@Warsawa31 trust me, he’s doing it at home ffs

he’s doing it in front of his wife though. If she doesn’t like it, that’s not his problem

How do you work that out? Of course it's his problem, he's the one behaving in a way that upsets someone he's supposed to care about.

@EveryDayIsADuvetDay love the honesty thank you 😂

@fedup that is horrendous - being in a restaurant is waaay worse 🤢

I think there’s probably a correlation between intelligence level and the “it’s unconscious behaviour innit” types.

It’s his body though, so he can do what he wants with his own body @isabellerossignol

Get him out of joggers and into a pair of properly fitting trousers.

It’s his body though, so he can do what he wants with his own body @isabellerossignol**

Yes, in private.

If you feel that an adult can do whatever they want to their own body in front of other people, that's pretty creepy.

It’s disgusting! It’s like watching a dog lick his arsehole all day. He’d have to be put outside Op

Do you have children OP?

Does he do it in front of them?

Lol I believe lots of blokes do it!
I actually dated a bloke once- of god we were just teenagers still..
He actually had holes in his jeans and walk with hands in his pockets!
And once my ex colleague gave me his old jeans( ripped 501s - I wanted these for ages in the 90s and his were the proper worn colour)
Guess what?
No pockets again!
When I asked him about it -he just said no blokes jeans have ever pockets..
So.....

Op your house is presumably quite unsanitary then!!
Knob residue all over your soft furnishings /kettle /door handles.
Fucking Grim...

Most def not envy..

Sweeping statement about intelligence ! Surely there must be some time in your life that you put aside time to just be. I find I only do it when I switch off. When I meditate or read I don’t do it, usually when watching tv or listening to music

When mine does this I reach over and grab the parts instead! I'm not necessarily gentle and he usually jumps rather high.

And you think it's your husband's behaviour that is the problem?

Its a bloke thing Really, only if the bloke is a nasty old man in a dirty mac.

I was married to my exh for over 20 years and there was a lot about him that I didn't like but never, ever did he sit around the house, or anywhere else, 'fiddling' with his penis.

Not sure I would have lasted 20 minutes with him if he had, let alone 20 years.

No, its awful. Would he do it in a job interview?

Possibly we are all becoing very aware of such matters. I started talking wit a mouthful of crackers the other day , not attractive.

Some of you are saying it’s not a bloke thing, but if you did a poll more than 75% of men would say they do it

Urgh I have shouted at DH for similar. Disgusting especially if he's not showered. The smell of sweaty ball sack wafting across the lounge not envy.

Urgh my dh does not do this, ever! My almost 4yo only does it when naked and even then I remind him he should only do it in private, he'd never stick his hands down his pants to do it.

When mine does this I reach over and grab the parts instead! I'm not necessarily gentle and he usually jumps rather high.

And you think it's your husband's behaviour that is the problem?

Nah, he likes it.

My DH does this. His hands are permanently on his nads. I've stopped trying to reason with him. I was getting nowhere.

My first husband had the nightly habit of literally shoveling his dinner down every night . Admittedly he worked long hours . After a shower the rest of the evening was spent in his bathrobe lying in front of the TV whilst scratching and even stretching the skin of his scrotum -the wrinkled old retainer . I never mentioned it tbh . Just divorced him .

It’s his body though, so he can do what he wants with his own body

Not in front of other people!! That is a ridiculous thing to say!
He can do what he likes in private, but he's not in private.

It's gross and disrespectful.

My DH works in a college and the amount of boys that just walk around playing with themselves is shocking. He will tell them to get their hands out of their trousers tho. I'm wondering if many people will generally pull young boys up on it so they grow up thinking it's ok cos most ppl are too embarrassed