To ask if as an adult you still get an allowance of some sort from your parents/caregivers?

[Lalala89]

Hi all,

I was listening to the radio station the other day and they had asked the above question of anyone over the age of 25.

Absolutely not meant in a negative way, but I was so surprised by the calls that came in, everything from parent's paying phone bill's to power, mortgages to lump sums yearly/monthly.

Parents paying for cars/ insurances, the caller that stuck with me was a lady who recieved $1200 a week from her mother into her children's accounts (so it wasn't taxed) as her mother wanted her grandchildren to have the best life possible.

Just interested if anyone has any stories along these lines because lockdown has me curious 😁

Yes FIL gives us a monthly payment. It's his way of feeling useful. We've told him multiple times but it's his way of helping us so we gratefully accept and use it for DD's school fees (international school abroad) and her piano lessons.

No sense of obligation whatsoever
They are not really those type of people
It's very much an extra
We support ourselves and could manage fine without it
I very much let my DH decide what it's being spent on

My friends parents bought each of her children a house when they were born and the rent pays school fees and a nest egg for when they’re older.

She’s v grateful but I know she sometimes struggles to pay for uniform and trips. The extras are costly. She’s very lucky though.

When my dad was alive he pod me to do his washing, bless him. My mum refused to do it for him “I’m his wife not his maid” and I was a single mum so we were both happy. I miss his thoughtfulness daily x

My mother has always paid my brothers rent and phone bills. He’s 35 now. Ridiculous.

Paid for uni. so they had no student debts, when they married gave them a lump sum, helped out with deposits on houses. One DS has borrowed money to buy a bigger house. Never thought of giving them standing orders though that is odd.

My cousins got a monthly allowance from my uncle.
One cuz got bratty when my uncle wanted to stop paying $2000pm to fund a “music” career. He’s mostly ok though now and not too bratty.
His sister was an entitled bitch and sued my aunt for millions (fraudulently) when my uncle died. Properly turned into a nutter. Money does strange things to people.
I don’t think adult allowances are a good thing (as a result).
I’ve had some help (second hand cars and rent free living at home) but I do return the favour when I can (nice gifts, trips, hotel stays, gigs, electronics, furniture). So it’s swings and roundabouts.

Not saying I’d turn it down if my parents were offering! But it’s a bit embarrassing to be funded by your parents if you’re a fully functioning adult.

My mum gives me and my brothers £1000 per year but often it's with strings attached ie she gets to 'influence' what it is spent on, but so long as it's something sensible she doesn't mind. I've used it for expensive glasses, private medical treatment, home improvements etc in the past. I think she just wants to be sure its not spent on gallivanting as I may have done in my youth but I'm pretty sensible these days anyway.

No, I pay for my mum and dad’s mobile contracts though.

Nope. Would consider that weird and embarrassing for a capable adult with the ability to earn to take handouts like that.

My parents are now elderly and I give them £1,000/month to help them out.

Not on a regular basis like this but I've had some very substantial lump sums from my mum in the past for things like a big house deposit, etc. She says she'd just rather I have some of my inheritance now, when I can make good use of it.

Nothing since I left school to go to university. I’m more likely to pay for things for them now . My sister lays my dads mobile phone bill .

My oldest is nearly 22 and still lives at home, I'm paying £4000 a year into his lifetime isa for 3 years to help him get on the housing ladder asap 😬 Will then do the same for the younger one.

When I go out with my parents I pay for them . I buy them plants for their garden . I couldnt imagine accepting money from my parents as an adult . I’d be embarrassed.

Absolutely not. It's about time those that do grew up! (Necessary disclaimer as theres alwags someone with a story to tell. . .
. Unless of course it is parents helping out because current situation makes it hard for their child so they sub them short term!)

there is one Direct Direct still going out of my bank each month that was meant to be temporary and I've just not got round to stopping it. It's around £10 a month for DD's road tax - I was with her when she bought the car and I offered to pay first year for her. That was 3 years ago

Has she never thought to mention it or just hoped that you wouldn't notice? It's not like she would have missed it when budgeting and planning as it's an absolute basic essential if you own a car - it isn't like an unused gym membership or a forgotten insurance plan.

She would also have had emails or letters from the DVLA at least once a year confirming that the agreement is still in place and will be rolling over to keep the car taxed for another year.

I think MN has an acronym for people like her

I initially sniffed at this, then I remember my dad pays for a family phone contract for us all! So I guess I do 😂

Not an allowance but OH parents take us on holiday once a year and give us a large cheque once a year too. They do this for OH siblings too.

No, not since I left University.

Surely the most common way for grandparents to help financially is by providing free childcare. That's a huge expense for those who have to pay it.

My parents put £100 in my account every month since I have had my children. It’s always much appreciated.

No but I work with someone who’s in laws give them £70 a week and pay for their holiday every year

Not a penny from parent since I was 14 and got a part time job after school.

I know lots of people whose parents pay for mortgages, cars, holidays, nursery fees, groceries, even cosmetic surgery!

You can't pick your families otherwise I'd have swapped them by now

I would love to say having no help from my parents has made me a better person, but no, my life has been much harder than theirs (they had lots of financial help from their parents) and it would have been nice to have had some support.

Dint know why people are so judgemental. Some people have lots of money. Some don't. It is not weird that someone with oodles of spare money would help out their adult dc. If it is not a life changing amount then it isn't going to affect their mindset at all. Just hanging on to it and leaving it when you die (minus huge taxes) is just odd in my mind. People seem to struggle with the idea that rich people spend their money on what they want.

Nope, nothing since Uni. In fact i helped her out a couple of times when she said she was skint....

That was before i found out her income (very generous widows pension, much higher than the national average salary) and that she’s just shit at managing money.

My parents will insist on paying if we go out for lunch, or if they pick up something from the shops (eg if they're coming over and I ask them to pick up milk) they won't ask for the money back (though I don't ask either if it's the other way round.

They also gave us money a couple of years ago when we had a run of unexpected expenses - washing machine, oven and boiler all packed up within a few weeks.

They're not well off but have some savings, and they certainly wouldn't want us to be stuck.

DH is the opposite- he gave ILs money every month for years, which was meant to be going towards a pension for them. Then he discovered MIL was spending it on cigarettes.