Very elderly shopping in Sainsburys today!

[ohdearmissus]

AIBU to feel unusually angry when seeing elderly (80's90's) shopping in Sainsburys today?
Angry enough to be posting here in aibu for the 1st time.
I realise that I am probably naive..but the elderly that I know are self isolating and being responsible...following the instructions we have been given..
I understand that they are likely aware of the risks...but I am trying to work out if I am raging because I'm thinking that if they do become ill..they will expect to be cared for by the nhs.
Quite simply..of the people that I saw today..if they catch coronavirus...baring a miracle...it will be the end for them..Maybe what has made me so angry is that if people are clearly not following the advice (I had thought that most were)...then this is going to continue to spread.
We all have to do our bit.
Happy to be told iabu..but trying to calm myself down by posting here!

I don't think the OP is worried about the elderly shoppers TDogsInHats it's more that she's annoyed that they're going out and putting themselves at risk and then will expect the NHS to care for them if they get ill.

that there is help available for all of those who need it

There is help, but most of these people probably don't know how to access it. In our village we have had a leaflet drop through every door. The leaflet has the name and phone number of people who can help with shopping, getting prescriptions etc, and the streets that they cover. This will provide information for anyone who doesn't have access to technology.

Not every area will have this kind of proactive help. I'm just glad that I live somewhere that is more community minded.

Even if an older person does have someone to do their shopping it’s their choice if they want to venture out to the shops, they’re not under house arrest.

If I was advised to stay inside for 12 weeks I’d seriously weigh up the health risks vs quality of life.

Couldn’t you feel desperately sorry for them instead or anger? They may have no-one to help or they may find it very hard to ask for help. Maybe that was their first trip out of the house for a week. We have to balance the need to be careful with the human desire for contact with others. Self-isolating is dreadful for a lot of people who live alone. There will be deaths from this in itself.

I’ll grant you, I could do without seeing couples out shopping at the moment. Seeing plenty of pairs (of all ages) and wondering why one couldn’t have been trusted with the shopping alone.

Also, op, if you're so cross about it, why don't you volunteer to help an older person with their shopping?

If I was advised to stay inside for 12 weeks I’d seriously weigh up the health risks vs quality of life.

This group of people haven't been told to stay in for 12 weeks though.

I’m pregnant and have had some horrible looks when I’m tescos! However no home delivery slots at all, I know people who have home delivery and their not high risk.
My parents are both at risk and I can’t rely on them. There is literally no one else to get my shopping.

There are hundreds of thousands of volunteers, our area is well-leafleted by people offering food runs, the elderly residents on our streets have all had many offers to do shopping... And they still go. It's really annoying me too.

Why are you angry with elderly people doing their shopping? There’s a fair bit to be angry about right now. A frightening lack of PPE for frontline staff. The fact that non UK nationals who are here helping to save lives get their visas extended for only a year, the government’s lack of action until the situation escalated. Dominic Cummings apparently uttering the words “if a few pensioners die, so be it” about his original tactic dealing with this...

But yeah get angry at the elderly going down Tesco for their groceries and sticking to/trying to stick to all the same rules the rest of us are

The death rate is running at around double for men. It's thought to be because the X chromosome plays a big part in immunity. So by that token men are inherently more at risk. So let's all be aghast if they're out and about....

We’re they social distancing? Or having a whist drive in the middle of frozen veg?

Not everyone has the luxury of family to shop for them!

Many elderly are just that, they don't have serious health issues so they can't access help for the vulnerable. They don't want to use the slot for them because those slots are really busy and they don't want to catch something else - covid 19 isn't the only bug doing the rounds. And as others have said, they can't get delivery slots even if they are tech-savvy.

There is a misconception that the over 70s should be staying at home for 12 weeks but that's not the case, only if they have underlying conditions and not all do. Also the death rate for the over 70s is something like 15% so even if they get it, they've an 85% survival rate. Note too that some may look older than they are.

And yes, a lot of the older ones (anyone over about 80) think they survived the war and post-war rationing and anything else is a sideshow.

Maybe they have no choice? Most of the older people I know don’t have the internet or don’t know how to use it well enough to shop online and as we know no slots available anyway. Maybe they haven’t got anyone to help. It’s a sad situation!

ANGRY at them?
So help me. I need to adopt a policy of hiding all the Resentful and Neurotic posts on MN. Wish me luck. I'm not sure what will be left. Recipes, maybe.

YAB hugely U.

DM is 83 and hasn't been able to get a delivery slot for getting on for two weeks despite being a regular customer at Morrisons and having a delivery pass for nearly a year. Every time we look another day is marked unavailable right up to 21st April. We live close so have been getting bits and pieces but if we didn't she wouldn't have any other choice. Maybe the people you have seen are unlucky enough to be in that position.

Another lovely thread blaming old people for all the ills in the world. How dare they go out. How dare they expect medical treatment.

Maybe some MNers would like everyone over the age of 65 to just die quietly?

@48thereplycamefromanchorage
My supposition was based upon our local communities. We've had a wonderful response from local businesses stepping in to help the vulnerable by delivering free hot meals.
Plus people hand delivering notices offering free help with shopping and prescription collection etc. to those who have no close family or friends for example.
I'm signed up as a volunteer, I didn't realise so many are slipping through the net.

YABU. My parents are 72 & 82 and can't get a slot.
Also some elderly haven't got or can't use a computer.
They may be quite scared of catching it.

It irks me too, but some elderly have literally nobody else in the world to help them and may not have helpful or forthcoming neighbours. They also may be too proud to ask others for help.

I don't think the OP is worried about the elderly shoppers TDogsInHats it's more that she's annoyed that they're going out and putting themselves at risk and then will expect the NHS to care for them if they get ill

Thing is arent a huge amount of reasons people need medical treatment self inflicted anyway.

Imagine I'd we refused care to - obese/underweight people, car drivers, sports people, pregnant women , drug takers, smokers etc in fact basically anyone who dared even get out of bed and participate in anything that could result in an injury.. like cooking or walking down the stairs..

Where does it end on what warrants a free pass on treating.

YABVU. Not ALL elderly people have someone to shop for them,and a lot of elderly people don't know how to use the internet to do an online order (that's even if there were any delivery slots available anyway). As for saying they would be expecting the NHS to take care of them if they became ill,why shouldn't they? Ageism at its finest. They've probably paid into the system for many years,so they are as entitled as anyone else.

There are so many lonely and isolated people in this country. I work for a local council and my team are ringing residents who are over 70 and listed as living alone with no known next of kin the list is very long. How else will they get their food as they truelly have no one. We are offering food parcels now to these people.

@Stuckforthefourthtime, there may be 'hundreds and thousands' of volunteers where you are, but this may not be the case where op lives - some areas have more developed networks than others.

Plus, over 70s do not have to 'shield' for 12 weeks unless they are in the extra vulnerable category. So just like under 70s without significant health problems, they are actually allowed to shop as long as they practice social distancing.

I am clearly guilty of believing what I have been told by the politicians/ media..that there is help available for all of those who need it...So that those who have been told to self isolate are able to.

Hahahahahahahahahaha

((Bitter laugh)))

Wouldn't it be nice...

I can certify100% that even being on the extremely vulnerable list and being savvy with technology gets you a total of

FUCK ALL support.
Except the lovely letter and daily texts telling you you're doomed and to eat 'plenty of fresh food'

OP you might well believe it's all sorted because the politicians keep saying it.

Oh my goodness, are you for real?! I thought you were going to say you were angry that they had to go to the supermarket because they didn’t have access to support from family/friends/neighbours. Wow.