To be mortified by DH

[Syncrows]

Obviously things have moved quite fast in the last week but I’m really worried about this.

DH worked for the NHS and has been worried about coronavirus for a while. We have two children at infant school. On Tuesday there was a display for Mother’s Day and on Wednesday some other assembly.

On Thursday DH rang up and absolutely lost it, shouting and swearing.

I know schools have now shut and the kids won’t be going in but I’m worried about when they do.

Should I try to get them in elsewhere ... I’m serious.

Totally outrageous behaviour, I'd be furious with him. Your OP was not at lol clear, just for the record.

*a bit

Is he phoning round all the pubs and clubs and swearing at the bar staff?

I’m sorry OP, that is really awful. No don’t move schools, why punish the kids for their father’s awful behaviour. And also it pains me to say it but it is good for teachers to know what kids have to deal with at home, particularly if his behaviour should escalate at home.

I would have told your idiot husband to F off.

What exactly was he yelling at them about? Eh?

On reflection had I heard a parent had been abusive to an another member of staff, then I would look at it as a potential safeguarding issue. Could this mean he would “ lose it” with his children too? Definitely cause for concern and him working for the NHS would not make him any less likely to become abusive/violent.

So he yelled at the staff in the office who answer the phones? What a JERK, like they have any decision making clout in the school. Is he one of those arses who also yells at the 19 year olds working in the supermarkets when there’s no toilet paper left? What a complete and utter fuckwit.

I think he was right to give them hell, what kind of idiots endanger childrens lives ?

He should be mortified. It doesn’t matter whether he was right, he just performed the sort of abuse that gets you banned from A&E.

Your DH was absolutely right, but swearing at them wasn’t. He was right to phone and tell them what they were doing was completely irresponsible.

I work in a school office and the last few days of last week were chaotic. I was on my own in the office as colleagues had, had to self isolate and/or had underlying health conditions meaning they cannot work in the current climate.

I will also be going back in tomorrow to man the office with a skeleton staff to enable key workers to look after people, exposing myself and in turn my own children to children of some of the most likely people to pick up the virus.

Luckily the parents at my school have on the whole been great and even thanked me last week for 'keeping their children's 'normal' as normal as possible'. If some cunt rang me and started ranting down the phone, I'd probably tell him where to stick it.

If this is out of character for him I would give him the chance to apologise profusely by email. Insist upon it in fact, it’s the very least he can do.

You don’t need to send your kids somewhere else - I doubt the staff would hold it against you as long as you apologise and explain how worried he is.

@UnaCorda the relevance is that the display and the assembly involved all the children being in the hall together, and presumably parents too. So not a good idea.
But absolutely no excuse for ranting the instant this poor woman picked up the phone, without even establishing who she was, introducing himself, or finding out what the facts were.

I was ready to send an email containing the same sentiment to my DC's school, but they did an about turn just in time so I didn't need to. I wouldn't have sworn, but I was ready to call them irresponsible and negligent for carrying on as normal.

Don't worry, OP. This has brought our the worst in a lot of people. I think the school will understand.

I sent a really rude email to one of hte admin staff at school last week. Her boss has been truly obnoxious to us for months, during which time my child has been really sick and unable to attend.

Her email had one pretty passive aggressive line in it (“even though the deadline was a week ago, we will still allow this note to be submitted”, more or less), and I just snapped.

About 10 minutes later I followed up with another email apologising profusely, explaining that it really was directed at the wrong person, and that apparently I had just found the last straw.

She was very gracious back, and said to think no more about it.

It happens, but the important thing, I would like to think, is what he did about it afterwards.

@UnaCorda the relevance is that the display and the assembly involved all the children being in the hall together, and presumably parents too. So not a good idea.

Ah, I hadn't thought about either of those things necessarily involving the whole school.

I tell you what, it’s not a bloody good idea that schools are open full stop!

Instead of being grateful that staff, who could very easily self isolate are instead looking after your children! But no you continue to be obnoxious!!!

Office staff will get over being sworn at - sadly it happens more than you'd think.. Seems your dh had a point.

After the current situation no-one will care - life will move on and so should you. He was invested and over-wrought, school was naive. No one will think badly of you

@planderaccordemont, OP says her DH "worked" in NHS - past tense. So no it doesn't sound like he's currently working massively long shifts on the frontline and being exhausted and stressed by what he's just seen before his very eyes. Nice dramatic touch tho.

He was obnoxious to a school receptionist. You don't need to move schools but he needs to send a note of apology and learn to handle his emotions like an adult not a toddler.

Schools should record their abusive callers play them back in assemblies

Have you thought of the impact this would have on the children....or was your comment made in haste.

it very obviously wasn’t a serious suggestion. However it might shame the abusive parents into behaving themselves if they thought their poor dc would be subjected to recognising daddy swearing at lovely Mrs Jones from reception.

(Again- because it clearly needs pointed out- not a serious suggestion)

What an arsehole

"Worked" as in past tense?

What as? A Cardio Thoracic specialist or a porter?

If someone called me at work and began the conversation with "what the fuck do you think you're playing at?" I would just hang straight up.