Friend irritating about baby name

[Nottodaysatan0]

Posted a while back that one of my friends had chosen the same name as me after I had mentioned it as being my top choice.
It’s a fairly common name so I said to her that I wouldn’t mind at all if she used it too as I’m not going to be petty about a baby name I have no rights to. Her response to that was that she doesn’t want to look like she copied me and I should think of something else!

At least once a week for the last six weeks or so and every single time I see her in person she has made comments like the name goes with her other children’s names but doesn’t match my child’s name so I should really look for something else etc etc followed by screenshots of lists of baby names online. then last night she messaged me to say “have you found a new name yet?” This pissed me off to be honest as it was basically her saying “I’m using the name so find something else” so I just firmly said I’ve chosen the name I picked to begin with and that’s that, she was welcome to use it but if she didn’t want to have the same name then she should choose something else. I then changed the subject and asked for an item of makeup back that she had borrowed a few weeks ago (not to be petty but because I genuinely needed it back) and she said her husband would drop it round in a couple of days - I thought this was pretty bitchy too as usually she would say yeah pop round for a cuppa etc
I’ve been decided on this name for two months, we have been calling the baby by the name and all of our family have too. I even have a blanket with the name on it for gods sake.

This friend seems to be the type to always get what they want and seems to think I’m going to just choose another name so she can have this one even though I had said i wanted the name before her (I’m due two months before her!).

What would anyone else do? She’s just not getting the message. And to be honest I don’t think our friendship will be the same after this purely due to the way she’s behaved about it - like a child!

I don't think this person sounds like a friend OP.

I would shut down discussion about the name. I would also use the name you chose for your baby. She is bullying you into letting her do what she likes and dismissing your needs. Does she have form for this? Names are very personal. And it doesn't matter if it doesn't go with your other child's name (which I bet is not true).

She's nuts. Use the name you picked.

Good luck enjoy the rest of your pregnancy this is not a friend . Look down at your baby once you have it in your arms and call it what you want too . If it’s a family name it’s a family name ( your family name ) so be it x

It really doesn’t matter in the grand scheme or in years to come.
My best friend (who I meant 12+ years ago when our boys were at first school together), her son has the same first & middle name as my son!

We didn’t know each other when they were born. They are 2 months apart in age.
It’s just one of those things.

We laughed about it when we discovered it (& complimented each other on our good tastes )
It really doesn’t matter & makes zero difference to either of us or the friendship.

Stick to your guns. If she brings it up again just look bored and say "Can you please not keep going on? You know what we're calling the baby".

Use the name. If you tell her you’ve changed your mind, she’ll probably ask for your personalised blanket as you won’t be needing it anymore.

*She is not getting the message"

Oh she is getting it but is choosing to ignore it.

Just use the name you have picked and ignore her. If she really loved it as much as she says, she'd have used it for one of her other three children surely. She sounds manipulative and bullying. Reduce contact with her.

People get very possessive about names. An ex colleague of mine fell out with her sister because her sister used 'her' girl's name. Her sister has two girls. My ex colleague has three boys. Neither have any plans for any more children.

I know there is nothing I can do but I’m absolutely
Raging and upset
My brother died recently and his ex owed him £10000 which he lent her with out taking any receipt or whatever he should have done
But he was a nice guy and trusted her
When I asked her what she was going to do about the loan she she had paid it back and he had just got confused and forgotten that.
I said well he definitely told me many times that you still owed it.

Know we do not have a leg to stand on to proof it but I am so upset that she could lie about this
I told her that she she would have this on her conscience then
She then said she would give me £5000 because she didn’t want any bad feeling
Though I know she will not even do that
Just needed to get this of my chest
I am grieving and she is making out my brother forgot she paid it back

choose another "friend"

Who does that?!! Do you know what her second name choice is? Still use your first choice and then steal her second as your chosen middle name. Nowhere to go! Seriously, she’s a tool. Make sure you tell everyone what a total nutter she is and then ignore her existence.

Sorry
I posted this on wrong post
So sorry. I’m a bit shattered at the moment because of my brothers death

I wonder what will happen when her little one starts to go to nursery, or school, and finds that other children have the same name? Meltdown? Not unlikely if it's a nice, popular one.
I had one memorable class with five Alexanders; we coped, nobody seemed scarred by the experience.

I chose what I thought was not the most popular name in the world for DD2, didn't meet another child with the name all through playgroup, nursery school etc, a couple of adults yes but no children. She turns up to inset day at senior school to find four others girls with the same name or variants of it and another four with similar names... I'm glad I wasn't their teacher haha..

I'd back away from the friendship at this point. She's like a dog with a bone and she's not going to let this go. You'll be getting name suggestions and criticisms from now until your baby is born. Then 'forever after' sly digs and her telling people that 'you stole her name'. How 'valuable' is this friendship that you want to put up with that?

How does a name 'not go' with a siblings name and why does it have to? It doesn't rhyme? It's from a different culture/country?

This:
'I will call my baby what I like. This is not ok and if you carry on I think I will need to end our friendship'.

If she asks: ‘DH and I have decided to keep our name choice confidential until baby is born’.

OMG what an absolute spoilt brat she is.
You stick to your guns and give your baby the name you’ve chosen.
I don’t know if I could see your friend in the same light after this.

She sounds like a cock! Keep the name you chose. It might be that she chooses a different name after you have used it, it does seem like it will bother her if you both end up using the same now. I would be livid over this. How dare she pester you asking you if you have picked another name!

Or call her bluff, pick another really nice name and come up with loads of reasons why it's better that the first name. Maybe then she will latch onto this one too. Obviously, after the baby is born, just tell her you changed back last minute.

Stick to your guns and if (when) she raises it again, tell her you won’t discuss it any more and the only people who get a say in what you name your child are you and your OH.

That ain't no friend! Run!!!!

So sorry for your loss @Mckmck123. keep on at your sil for the money. Even if you don't get it back you'll get some comfort in making her think. She knows she still owes it. Don't let this go.

If she doesn't want to look like she's copied you then she shouldn't copy you. She's ridiculous.

So she decides to copy you and then try's to get you to
Find a new name. Not on. Glad you told her how it is!! Stick to the name you chose, she needs to pick a new name if she doesn't want the same name

Kindly and firmly tell your friend you're naming your baby as you wish, then do it. She may have problems and worries apart from names.

She sounds like a spoiled child. Give your baby the name you chose, ignore her ridiculous comments, and to be honest I wouldn't want a friend like this.