Friend irritating about baby name

[Nottodaysatan0]

Posted a while back that one of my friends had chosen the same name as me after I had mentioned it as being my top choice.
It’s a fairly common name so I said to her that I wouldn’t mind at all if she used it too as I’m not going to be petty about a baby name I have no rights to. Her response to that was that she doesn’t want to look like she copied me and I should think of something else!

At least once a week for the last six weeks or so and every single time I see her in person she has made comments like the name goes with her other children’s names but doesn’t match my child’s name so I should really look for something else etc etc followed by screenshots of lists of baby names online. then last night she messaged me to say “have you found a new name yet?” This pissed me off to be honest as it was basically her saying “I’m using the name so find something else” so I just firmly said I’ve chosen the name I picked to begin with and that’s that, she was welcome to use it but if she didn’t want to have the same name then she should choose something else. I then changed the subject and asked for an item of makeup back that she had borrowed a few weeks ago (not to be petty but because I genuinely needed it back) and she said her husband would drop it round in a couple of days - I thought this was pretty bitchy too as usually she would say yeah pop round for a cuppa etc
I’ve been decided on this name for two months, we have been calling the baby by the name and all of our family have too. I even have a blanket with the name on it for gods sake.

This friend seems to be the type to always get what they want and seems to think I’m going to just choose another name so she can have this one even though I had said i wanted the name before her (I’m due two months before her!).

What would anyone else do? She’s just not getting the message. And to be honest I don’t think our friendship will be the same after this purely due to the way she’s behaved about it - like a child!

Do you both know if you're having boys/girls???

Ignore her...you are having baby first, you don't mind if she chooses the same name, she's crazy to think she can dictate what someone else calls their child!!!

If she messages you again, I would v firmly shut this down
“You keep bringing up the name issue so I am going to be as clear as I can. We chose the name first, my baby is due before yours and we are going to use (X name). What you choose to do is entirely up to you. If we are to continue being friends, you need to stop bullying me in the hopes I will change my mind. I won’t. Again it’s really up to you”.

assuming neither of you are 12 (hope not as you are pregnant!) just dump, what an incredibly boring woman. The playground 'you are copying me' mentality is quite common on here but I can't imagine anything duller in real life.

She's not a friend.

She wont use the name of you call your baby it first.Promise.Shes just trying it on.

If not off

Just use the name, she is due after you so will need to decide whether she wants to pick something else or look like she’s copied.

If she brings names up again I’d just keep repeating that you’ve chosen and won’t be changing your mind. She is free to do what she wants and you don’t mind her using the same name.

I would also probably give her a wide berth, she sounds very childish and irritating.

We had our daughter and called her our chosen months before name. Childhood friends of DH knocked on the door unexpectedly to ask if we minded if they called their DD the same as they had chosen it months ago too. I said no problem at all it is a lovely name. We don't see them very often anyway. They went ahead. Girls went to same Brownie pack and also another girl with same name as it became popular. Roll on to Secondary school and girls at different schools miles apart but started to be in an activity together. My DD came home talking about their DD so I told her the story and she then told their DD. The girls laughed about it and then realised they were born a week apart and that we knew her parents, especially DH. They also have a mutual friend with the same name that gets called by part of her surname to avoid confusion.

Go ahead call your child whatever you want. Just ignore the tactics. What a cheek! Matching names - hilarious! I did know a family in the same village who called their 7 children all beginning with M. Bonkers, think of the mail if they didn't leave home early.

Honestly I would block her.

You tell her you are calling the baby something outlandish just to shut her up. Watch the fun.

You’re doing the sensible thing I think. If she mentions it again you could just be really blunt about it

‘this is getting weird now, I told you that we have chosen this name and I don’t care if you like it and want to call your child it too, that’s your decision and choice to make. I will not be changing my child’s name just to suit your choices, if you don’t like that you’re naming your child the same name as mine then don’t do it, don’t expect me to change my decisions for you though’.

I'd tell her I'd decided on something else just to get her to shut up, then use the name anyway!

I’d have blocked her a long time ago if I’m being totally honest. You have been fair and measured, she is being utterly ridiculous.

Just ignore her. Use the name. Yours will arrive first anyway! Shes being silly.

Use the name you want.
Personally I think she sounds bonkers.

She sounds like a tit, name your baby as you please.

I'd say to her next time I'm not changing my mind, don't raise this subject ever again.

Friend of mine had this. She and her cousin were due within a few weeks (friend due first): friend tells cousin the name they are using … cousin goes mental. That's her name, find something else, etc. In the end one had a girl and one a boy, so it wasn't an issue, but definitely left a bad taste in DF's mouth. If your 'friend' tries again, just say 'jeez, you sound batshit' and then cease all communication regarding baby names. Ignore.

Well she’s got a point - everyone knows that if two children have the same name then they have to fight to the death as there can only be one!

smile ignore. smile ignore smile ignore smile

you name your baby what you want

See, now I’d go a different way. I’d give my kid my preferred original name, and my friend’s first name as the middle one. Without mentioning it until the deed was done.

So when she tries to suggest you stole ‘her’ baby name, you look like the sweet caring one and she looks like a callous bitch. Forever.

Call it the ‘petty double-down’ manoeuvre. Checkmate.

Just tell her, sure sure I'll use a different name, but then use the name you planned. You don't need the hassle from her!

I am assuming that you both know whether you are having a boy or girl. When I was pregnant people would ask if I had chosen names. I just answered 'we have a few that we like but haven't decided on one yet'.

I know that no one owns a name but I am a bit precious about names.

I will name my baby what I choose and you are free to do the same. It appears it won’t matter in the long term because her batshittery will drive you apart anyway.

These sort of posts are like the parking posts, no-one owns a name or a parking spot!
A relative had her second son on the same day as the Queen had her second, the relative called her son Andrew and for the rest of her life was accused of pinching the Queen's choice of name, which wasn't announced for weeks!