To not even know how to start losing weight

[Catminder901]

To start with, I will admit that I am overweight - like, very overweight. Like BMI of 47 overweight.

I've always been quite fat, but piled on weight during both my pregnancies and never really managed to lose it. I'm Type 2 diabetic (surprise, surprise) and also have high blood pressure.

A pro pro of high blood pressure, my GP said I really need to lose weight and has referred me to see a dietitian. I'm just genuinely struggling to get my head round how I will actually start losing weight.

I have a lot of weight round my tummy and hips and thighs, so I waddle when I walk, plus I get out of breath and sweat and wheeze. It does not make exercise easy or appealing.

I don't actually massively overeat. I've tried diets and I can stick to them, but the second I lapse, all the weight goes on again and I feel like, why bother with this one?

I am sure a lot of people are going to think: just have some self control. But I honestly feel like, it would be so much easier to lose weight if I wasn't starting from quite such a bad point!

And I do want to change. I know that I'm at risk of health problems. I don't feel attractive. I can't do things which I'd like to do. And worst of all, I feel like once my kids are a bit older, I am going to be an embarrassment to them. I am THAT person who is so fat that people stare.

If anyone has any helpful hints (even along the lines of, you will be fat forever, just try to accept it) I would be so grateful.

Agree with the PP who mentioned James Smith. Not everyone’s cup of tea but he is completely no nonsense and pulls up a lot of toxic diet industry bullshit too

Stop saying this to yourself - nobody gets to bmi 47 unless they are massively overeating

People who use their family habits and restaurant portions as a guideline sometimes don't even realize how much they are overeating in terms of portion size.

Also, without a diary/photo diary studies have shown people often misremembered what they had snacked on, always underreporting.

Things like portion control plates and scoops are massively helpful.

For some reason it won't let me posted a photo but just Google 'portion control products'.

Damn thread’s just made me get off my arse and get some steps in. Was sitting here ignoring that I was well sort of 10k...

I have an embarrassing problem... basically, since second pregnancy I have had pathetic bladder control and I'm constantly leaking and having "accidents" when I walk

That's probably sweat, not wee.

I speak as an ex morbidly obese mother of 4. I used to be certain I had a weak bladder. No question about it because any amount of exertion would result in soaking wet knickers. If that exertion lasted more than 15 minutes then my trousers would also need changing. On hot days even without exertion, I'd need to change my wet knickers 3 or 4 times a day.

Weak bladder seems like the obvious reason. But no. It's fanny sweat.

Plus thigh sweat. Plus belly sweat. Plus sweat from under your belly overhang. And all the rest. All that wetness - it's sweat.

So, see it as A Good Thing. Sweating means your raising your heart rate. That means you're making your heart a little bit healthier. Do more exercise. Sweat more. Just plan for having clean, dry clothes to change into afterwards.

The more weight you lose, the more effort it will take to sweat, so you will sweat less.

I don't actually massively overeat

You do overeat.

But that's ok. It's easy to re-educate yourself on the amount if calories you actually need. But right now, you are eating far too many.

I think on the basis you have type 2 diabetes and are on insulin you need to be careful as to how you manage your diabetes whilst you change your lifestyle. Type 2s struggle to metabolise carbs so it seems fairly intuitive to me to reduce the carbs we eat to a level that our bodies can cope with. You probably have a meter so I suggest you record everything you eat and your readings and see how they vary with what you eat and then cut out reduce things that spike your levels. Reducing your blood glucose levels will hopefully also incentivise you.

I really recommend Low carb high fat - You don’t have to go the full Keto route but it has reduced my appetite hugely and no bingeing. I don’t feel deprived as I love veg not keen on fruit so don’t miss it. Still have 2-3 sq of dark choc every night! Diet doctor website has lots of recipes.

@Catminder901

Sending you a PM.

@FATEdestiny lol, I think it is both in my case.

But oh my God, the sweating...! I totally get that. Especially the belly sweat and belly overhang. I get rashes too, it is totally disgusting. If I could shift a bit of the weight from round my middle I'd be pleased as a starting point.

I’ve done Team Rh and found it easy to follow and lose weight with, it’s just calorie counting, as long as I stay in my calorie allowance can eat what I want (within reason, it should be 80% nutritional and 20% rubbish) and the only exercise I needed to do was walking, I can now manage 15000 steps a day quite easily! I’d recommend drinking plenty of water aswell.

I don't actually massively overeat

You do overeat

It is perfectly possible that the OP does not overeat in calorie terms. But she is Type 2 diabetic which obviously demonstrates she does not metabolise sugar and starch efficiently anymore, and needs more and more insulin to regualate

Anyone who knows anyone who has had to take insulin to treat diabetes will know that you put on weight DESPITE calories

People who work on a straight calories in calories out calculation are literally incorrect. It is much more complicated.

Our hormones regulate how the energy is stored or used. Surely EVERY woman knows this as they see weight fluctuate every month without an change to calories.

10k of steps! I dread to think how far off that I am.

www.diabetes.co.uk/in-depth/david-unwin-low-carb-not-just-diabetes/

Dr David Unwin is well worth looking into. He is revolutionising Type 2 treatment in the NHS (and obesity as a by product)

If I asked you why you think you have Type 2 OP, what would you say?

Following for advice on losing weight myself.
You're doing brilliantly op. Well done. Small steps

When are your trigger points for eating? Mine is late at night or when I'm making DC's dinner, or when I'm upset. So I'm trying to go to bed if I fancy eating or having a cup of tea instead of a snack. Yours might be in the car or in the afternoon. When you work yours out, try to find another strategy or tactic to use.

I can't have sweets, biscuits or crisps in the house at all because I'll eat them - it was my son's birthday party recently and I had to buy all the treat food and party bag sweets three times because I ate it all!

Re moving more, forget some it as a way to lose weight - this is important if you want to be alive and active for your children and also very important for mental health.

I have an app on my phone like apple fit which tracks my movement. I've found it really interesting to look, and I've set myself little goals like trying to do a certain number of steps a day.

Maybe see what you already do on an average day and add on another 20% of steps as a goal. If that goes ok, the following week increase by a bit more, and so on. Good luck

I can definitely recommend MFP and keeping a diary is the only thing that helped me.

However I ABSOLUTLEY had to buy digital scales and measuring spoons/cups, I had been severely underestimating portions like how much muesli was a portion how much "a table spoon" of peanut butter was.

You also have to log EVERYTHING, every cup of tea with sugar, every sneaky biscuit, everytime I polished off my partners leftovers... It took me a while to get honest with myself and measure/log my food properly.

Also I had to bin everything snacky, I couldn't have crisps, biscuits or even cereal in the house otherwise I'd just eat the lot in a weak moment. I had to make sure most of my food I'd have to prepare in some way otherwise it'd get scoffed.

1500 calories is also quite a crash diet with your BMI don't set yourself up to fail, I'd at least make a start at 2000 and see where you are in a month. Also remember its a marathon not a sprint its going to probably take a couple of years with some ups and downs.

Other advice I can give is don't compensate by starving yourself the next day if you massively overeat the day before, just reset and hit your goals the next day, don't set yourself up for binge/restrict cycles. It is a lifestyle change not a diet. Try and eat at a table with a knife and fork and don't just mindlessly eat in front of the tv, and exercising can be anything that just involves moving, even just walking round the block (I got myself a cheap pedometer at first and then requested a fitbit for xmas) start slow and build your way up. Xxx

Good luck OP

@hamstersarse Because I am overweight! Thanks for the link, I will def take a look.

@Bookoffacts: good luck with your weight loss journey too! I hope this is helpful in some way. And thank you for the congratulations, which I don't feel like I have deserved. So far I've downloaded an app and walked round the block, lol. Most normal people can walk round the block without having to stop three times and collapsing in a sweating, panting heap for half an hour after getting back

OP, a couple of months ago I’d have struggled to physically manage 10k steps. My average day was approx 3k tops.

I’ve added in walking on the spot whilst I’m facebooking/waiting for the kettle to boil/waiting for the kids at school etc. Since my last post, I’ve done 3k steps round the kitchen watching a YouTube video.

And I’ve started swimming. It’s achievable.

@PrinnyPree, @nanbread thank you for the encouragement. Interesting about the portion sizes, because I'm sure that I probably underestimate too. I also just eat too much generally: not one yoghurt but two, not one piece of chicken but three, etc..

My triggers are: evening (I can basically just graze all evening without intending), preparing food for DC at a different time to me and DH's meal (I basically just go, "I'll try a little bit of this" and end up having an extra meal ), and getting upset stressed.

Because I'm feeling crappy and upset about my exercise failure and how hard this is going to be, I really want to eat. I want it so much that my stomach is feeling all knotty and gurgly. But I am trying to resist!

Because I am overweight!

It can be linked to being overweight but doesn't always follow."Thin' people can be T2.

It is a layer below and related to how your body processes carbohydrates - sugar and starches - the body needs to produce insulin in the pancreas to reduce the sugar in your blood.

If you have consistently raised insulin, 2 things will happen - first you are very likely to get fat as if you have too much sugar in your blood, insulin pushes the excess glucose into your cell, as fat! Secondly, over time you may become insulin resistant (as you have) and the job that insulin is there for just stops doing its job

So you have to have extra insulin put into you (via meds) to try and lower your blood sugar. This makes you put on more weight as that is what insulin does.

You would be crazy not to look at low carb.

I'll give it a go, for sure. I've read Tom Watson's book lately and it was quite motivational for me, as an insulin-dependent T2.

I don't actually massively overeat
You obviously do. And you've admitted it in your subsequent posts.

The first step is to acknowledge that. Keep a strict food diary for even a few days -preferably a week.

Very similar triggers to me @Catminder901

Maybe just get into bed in the evening away from food temptation and read a book or watch something on your phone? Would that work?

And you aren't a failure! You went for a walk! Anything you do is better than doing nothing! Even if you only got for a walk once a week that's four times a month more than you were last month!

It doesn't sound like you had an exercise failure to me it sounds like you smashed through a barrier and did yourself proud, the fact that you needed half an hour of recovery time from your walk means you've really exerted yourself and probably burned some decent cals! Also it gets easier, honestly be proud of yourself OP. Xxx

WW has worked for me,they have an excellent tracker app and online support. It really encourages a healthy lifestyle (if you ignore the junk food they have on sale) I actually eat more and lost a stone in 7 weeks.

Tom Watson was LCHF / keto

He reversed his diabetes and lost all his weight

There is FB group called Keto UK Community - I actually find the mods a little strict but the posts on there are unbelievable. Person after person showing the changes that have come from going LCHF