Do you regret not having children ?

[Nofoolfornoone]

YABU- no i don’t regret not having children
YANBU- yes I regret not having children

I'm 50 so almost certainly couldn't have children even if I wanted to.

But I've never wanted to.

So no, I don't regret it at all. I look at friends and relatives with children and really don't want their lives. Even the 'good' parts of being a mother - the sticky kisses, the 'I wuv you mummy', the 'loving the bones of them' as MNers like to say - simply don't appeal and never have.

What do you think you're being unreasonable about?

Absolutely no regrets here at age 45.

I am the wrong side of 40 and have never wanted kids ,

@lockheart I don’t but I wanted to have an anonymous vote so people were more able to be honest and it was the only way i knew how to do it

I started a poll asking if people who had children regretted it and someone said it was pointless as you are far more likely to regret not doing something. Hence this poll.

Why do you want to know?
Is this thread for childless, or childfree people? The two are diametrically opposed, so I wouldn’t give my actual thoughts here since it’d be viewed more often by the childless. There’s plenty of childfree women spaces online OP, but without elaboration, nah, I absolutely, 100% would not be impregnated, produce a kid, have any kind of parenting role to a kid or be around one willingly for longer than a few minutes.

Why shouldn't the OP want to know, it's interesting.

@electrical I want to know as I previously had fertility treatment with a partner, very much wanted a child. It wasn’t successful and we separated. Now I am single and approaching the age where I need to make some conscious decisions about if i want children or not.

@Nofoolfornoone

Why the new thread asking childfree women if they regret NOT having kids?

Didn't get the result you wanted on here eh? Hoping more women regretted having kids? But 70% of women don't!

You must be very disappointed in this result to have started a new thread. wink

You seem very determined to try and find women who are happy to not have children.

SO...

What is it...

Do you regret having them?

Or are you planning having them and worried about regretting it?

Because you seem determined to get the answer that people regret it.

The fact is, most people don't regret their children.

@Nofoolfornoone with respect, what a thousand and one other people might feel about not having children will make no difference to how you will feel about not having children. You need to decide what you want to do with your life - what other people wanted to do with theirs shouldn't feature. If that poll says 100% of voters don't regret it, will that make you regret it less?

@Nofoolfornoone

Cross post with you and you have explained. Sorry......

@faracrossthepond I’m not sure why your post is so accusatory ? It’s quite clear why I started the new thread. It’s because a poster suggested this question was unhelpful as you are far more likely to have regrets about things you don’t do

@Lockheart absolutely very true but learning from others experience can be helpful.

storm because childfree women are constantly questioned, dismissed, sneered at, told they don’t know their own minds, there’s something wrong with them, they’ll change their minds, what’s the point of their marriage, or them as a woman if they don’t breed, etc.etc. It’s relentless.

I want to know why someone wants childfree women to justify themselves to her. Or if the post is aimed at childless people, which is as opposite to childfree as a parent is. Or if she’s a journalist. It’s a fair question. HTH

My life situation isn't good, so I am glad I never brought a child into it. And now a medical issue has taken the decision away from my hands. I don't regret it- it's just the way life panned out and nothing I did or will do can change that.

Never wanted them, never going to have them (47 now)
But sure plenty of other people are childless not by choice but due to circumstances (not met right partner) or physically could not have them. They probably regret that it never happened.

@Nofoolfornoone

I did explain myself sorry. To me, you seemed to be determined to hear that women regretted it and I thought you seemed annoyed they mostly didn't. I can see why you are asking/posting now.

I was wrong. Sorry if I offended you.

@Electrical to be clear I am not a journalist and I am not asking anyone to justify their decision.
But I am interested in learning from others experiences. There are so many negative messages about not having children, whether subconscious or conscious and so I am interested to know the reality.
It is not my intention to offend or judge. I need to make some decisions and am looking to learn from others

The fact is, most people don't regret their children.

And yet it’s also possible that those who choose not to have children don’t regret that choice either, no?

I don’t regret not having children. I’ve always preferred dogs to kids, and anyway looking at the news every morning when I wake up just makes me thankful that I never brought a child into the world. I’m a terrible worrier, and the anxiety would have crippled me.

My post was aimed at childfree people

What's the score? I can't see without voting.

currently:
YABU:
84%
YANBU:
16%
Total votes: 31

I am childfree and always will be (by choice) honestly i just dont like kids

Happy to see so many women happy they didn't have children :)

Completely agree with Electrical it's shocking how child free (and child less) women are viewed. Come to think of it, it's shocking how mothers are treated as well.