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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What are the most stupid injuries you’ve had?

265 replies

UnicornRiders · 25/02/2020 00:32

I know this isn’t the right place, but let’s try to create some humour on AIBU for once Grin

My most stupid injuries are,

I slept funny on my arm which resulted in a dead arm, I then slapped myself across the face, leaving a bruise

Was moving a rock in my garden, dropped it on my foot and broke a toe

Knocked myself out chasing my friend up a slide - I was 14 Grin

OP posts:
NC4Now · 26/02/2020 09:36

I actually slipped on a banana skin

BiBiBirdie · 26/02/2020 09:39

DD headbutted me laughing and broke my nose. Went to walk in and the staff were very Hmm about it. One nurse even asked if I needed to go to a safe place as they could help.

Ponoka7 · 26/02/2020 09:41

Dropped the spoon I was using to stir hot chocolate with. Bent over to pick it up, spilt hot chocolate on my bare skin, did a weird little hop and took my toe nail off with the spoon.

Damntheman · 26/02/2020 09:43

A mosquito broke my foot last summer, that's my best story :D

BlossomCat · 26/02/2020 09:50

I gave Dh a nosebleed, and I got a very sore ear by having sex...
We were having a quickie, and I was wearing anchor shaped earrings. I was on top, bent down to kiss him and got my earring caught up his nose.
It took a while for us to disentangle ourselves, and quite killed the mood.Grin

MrsMonkeyBear · 26/02/2020 09:51

Due to hypermobility in my hands and wrists I often sprain various joints in them. I've sprained my wrist cutting a block of butter wrong.

I've opened one of the metal fridge doors at work and bruised my knee so badly, I had to take 3 days off until I could walk properly.

Knocked myself out and got concussion by whacking my head off a shelf.

Pulled down a box from a shelf and didnt realise it was a heavy as it was. It landed on my face, broke my nose, got a massive black eye and there was blood everywhere (not a good look whilst wearing chefs whites)

ReverseGiraffe · 26/02/2020 09:53

I've always been really clumsy so have countless examples of stupid injuries but these are a few:

Smashed my face on rocks using a rope swing as a teenager. I've never had any upper body strength so should have known this was a bad idea.

Flew over a bench running away from the police in the park when I was about 16 and drunk on vodka. Bottle smashed and I cut my knee and hands up.

Walking under a beam at work, misjudging how low it was and whacking myself in the head. My colleagues spent a couple of hours worrying I had concussion and offered to take me to minor injuries but I was so embarrassed I just sat there seething. I probably should have been checked out because I was dizzy and headachey and clearly not right, but all was okay in the end.

Last year managed to stab myself in the finger trying to get chocolate concrete out of a baking tray with a knife. Splattered blood all over my kitchen and sustained nerve damage. My hand goes numb all the time and the scar still hurts!

Lunafortheloveogod · 26/02/2020 09:54

Pretended to knee friend.. slipped broke my tail bone.

Skate boarded face first, cartoon style wrap around, into a stone lamp post at speed lost a tooth.. two black eyes and a cracked rib. Looked like I’d been in with mike Tyson. Didn’t do my at the time boyfriend any favours at a&e not a soul in their believed anyone was daft enough to not jump off or fall backwards.

Also skate board related incident.. ran over by my bosses stationary car.... flying down the hill like my life depended on it (train came in 2 minutes before start or 2hours... what’s a teenager picking) and went to bank round the corner to get to the back door... bastard was parked just round in the alleyway, board under the car with me doing a proper roll up onto the hood. Boss almost pissed himself laughing... he also then told me if it’d stop me endangering the population I could take 5 minutes off my lunch to come in at a safe pace.

Safe to say my career as a dare devil skate boarding rock chick wasnt long lived. Those were only the most wtf injuries... there were many more. Including attempting to skate in stilettos, cause clearly trainers were causing all my accidents Hmm

WrackspurtsAndNargles62442 · 26/02/2020 10:12

Herniated disk and consequent sciatica from 'sitting funny' (physio's words!)
Packing a bag for a holiday, twisted funny and heard a pop - dislocated my knee cap and broke the articular cartilage. Had to have gas and air while the paramedics re-located the knee cap - apparently most just pop back in by themselves, but naturally I had to do a 'proper job' on it!

ContessaferJones · 26/02/2020 10:15

Burned myself with a hot water bottle (with a cover on!), leaving a permanent scar.

Burned myself with soup, leaving a permanent scar.

Burned my foot with molten pie filling when removing pie from the oven.

Burned palm of my hand CATCHING a molten jam tart as it fell from the oven-hot tin.

There's a theme here Grin

BiBiBirdie · 26/02/2020 10:25

@Lunafortheloveogod you reminded me of a stupid rock chick teen one
Got a mate to push me home in a trolley (as you do). He pushed it at speed down a steep hill next to a main road. Luckily at 3am it was a quiet road.
Course, he then can't stop, and we go hurtling down the hill. He ends up letting go of the trolley and rolling down on concrete. Trolley carries on but I learnt my weight in a way that meant it stopped without falling over.
So, I stood up doing a victory dance. Caught my wedge heel in the child seat on dismount, landed, from height, face first on pavement with trolley landing on my back.
Didn't realise how bad it was until the morning when my house mates made funny faces at me asking had someone hit me last night. My lips had swollen, had two black eyes and blood all over my chin. Still have the chipped front tooth to this day.

Nat6999 · 26/02/2020 10:30

Having to have a cut on my face glued back together after tripping over my bag strap when pissed & surfing face first on the pavement. Breaking my ankle on one leg & my other foot after trying to stand up in my touring caravan to turn the heating up but forgetting that my legs were dead from being sat on, going down like a ton of bricks & hearing my bones snap then having to wait for paramedics to extract me off the floor to take me to hospital.

Spidey66 · 26/02/2020 10:39

Stubbed my little toe on the coffee table and broke it. (The toe, that is, the coffee table's fine).

FAQs · 26/02/2020 10:39

Tore muscles in my bicep and shoulder on an inflatable fun run throwing myself over a very wet 5ft ‘wall’ landed with my arm backwards, had to be carried over the wall by 3 people and 4 months recovery, was much more painful than the wrist I broke tripping up the stairs.

Wickedwoo · 26/02/2020 10:46

Just before a GCSE exam i stood on my hair straighteners and blistered the bottom of my foot i had to hobble to school with one shoe on.

I drove to chip shop on my lunch break and had a curry sauce but had nowhere to put it so i put it between my legs, someone pulled out on me so i had 2 break suddenly which resulted in me squeezing the polystyrene curry sauce pot and it broke and the curry sauce burnt my fairy oh i did yelp and swear it hurt bad i pulled over and took my trousers off and had to drive home with a seat cover over me. When i rang work to explain everyone thought it was very amusing apart from me

OldQueen1969 · 26/02/2020 11:06

As a child - tried to adjust a sun bed while sitting on it and it smacked me solidly on the side of the head.

Opened the doors into my Uncle's garden just as football mad cousin launched an impressive kick - ball hit me square in the face.

As an adult - being starved for surgery in hospital, answered a phone call from my Mum at the nurses station - everything vanished down a dark tunnel and went down like a sack of potatoes. Left hospital with a stonking black eye - the surgery was moved up the list sharpish though.....

Used our kitchen step to retrieve ancient plate of mince pies from a cupboard - picked up plate, turned about three inches to put it down on the counter and back went into severe spasm - I do have an unstable sacrio-iliac joint but even so.... took weeks to recover.

Repeated the above lifting a half full laundry basket from the floor to the bed.

Best one was breaking my ankle by my foot slipping off one step at 6.00 am. Crumpled in a heap in the bend in the stairs, didn't know if I was going to vomit, cry or pass out - think I did a bit of all three. Howled for help but DP was sleeping like the dead. Eventually managed to crawl back upstairs, reach across the end of the bed and grab DPs foot to wake him. He shot up in bed and I must have looked like something out of The Ring judging by his scream. He helped me back into bed, got some frozen veg to wang on it, we decided it probably wasn't serious (had never broken a bone before) swilled down three Ibuprofen with half a glass of rose wine that was to hand and went back to sleep. Woke up later and swelling proved A&E was probably a good idea.

Got a taxi to A&E. Waited for triage. At first stage a couple of earnest medics threw up their hands in horror and lectured me soundly about the dangers of taking too much Ibuprofen when asking about pain relief. I thought better of mentioning the wine. Got put in one of those chairs with the leg extended and taken to X-ray. Ankle had to be manipulated to get the right angle. Technician had to do it twice. Ouch. Back to waiting room. Dishevelled looking man in his 60s called me from the treatment area - thought he was a porter - nope, he was the doctor. I in chair and DP and doctor all cram into an eye examination room so we can go through the X-rays and sort out if I'm having a boot or a cast. Lots of questions asked about medical history. Had I had any surgery? Well, yes, 30 ish years ago but not sure how its relevant (bit tired, cranky and in pain at this point), but I must disclose. So I mentioned two terminations back in my younger days and then the Dr asks if it is ok to say it in front of my DP - well as it happened yes, he was aware, but it could have been handled better as it was too late by that point anyway if it wasn't appropriate. Icing on cake - as DR wheels me backwards out of tiny room, a nurse stopped him to speak, and he swung my extended leg into a metal bin just outside the door. Oh, how we laughed that day.

Untrained · 26/02/2020 11:25

I got head-butted by my horse and nearly bit my own tongue in two. Oh the pain! I was convinced Id see part of my tongue on the floor when I (eventually) opened my eyes! There was lots of blood, and a lacerated and very swollen tongue meant I couldnt talk or eat properly for a good couple of weeks!

SingleSidedShoulderShrug · 26/02/2020 12:36

I broke my leg falling down a manhole that did have a come near it but I didn't see it because I was looking up at the red arrows Blush didn't spill any of the drinks I was carrying!

labazsisgoingmad · 26/02/2020 15:46

dislocated my shoulder badly by hitting a wall but i walked round with it out for four days before a GP i was seeing about something else said it looked like i was lop sided. trip to a and e and in the end an operation as it would not go back aches a lot these days nearly 40 years later
broke a toe falling out of bed in fact done that several times not safe even in bed

feemcgee · 26/02/2020 15:47

Broke my toe making pastry - dropped the rolling pin on it. Agony.

Aposterhasnoname · 26/02/2020 15:57

Tried to catch the blade off a food processor as it fell from a cupboard. It buried itself into my knuckle. Pulled it out and on seeing my exposed bone promptly fainted and knocked myself out, cutting my head wide open as I did so. Poor DH was walking the dog and Still hasn’t recovered from coming home to a spark out DW in a kitchen covered in blood.

Graphista · 26/02/2020 16:02

@highlighta - I trip a lot too, the times when I’ve done so while “Merry” I’ve been absolutely fine maybe a small graze. The ones I’ve done stone cold sober have been incredibly painful and big injuries! The worst involved stupidly high heels (I’m a short arse at 5’1” so wearing very high heels buggers with my centre of gravity more than others, I can no longer wear heels for other reasons this is a good thing) and stone steps at a pedestrian underpass, caught a heel at the top and basically slid down the whole lot on my shins! Tights wrecked, skirt torn I was a mess! This was at the start of a night out and I still went! Regretted it the next day especially as people were joking it must have been the drink - I’d not even had one at that stage!

@vampirethriller I burnt my mouth on hot soup at school once (we had a hot drinks machine in the canteen and I loved the tomato soup but it was always VERY hot so I should have known better) such a bad burn that the roof of my mouth peeled, spend the next few days when home sucking ice cubes.

A friend on a night out clubbing cracked her head on a hand dryer. Looks were very busy and so she’d crouched under it to stay with us going loo and when she stood up to leave she forgot it was there and cracked her head right on the edge of the metal bit the air comes out of! Loads of blood but only a tiny cut. We all went with her to A&e and were fascinated at the use of glue to fix it. (This was a LONG Time ago)

Dd with her Eds has also managed to sprain her wrists opening doors, drawers, cupboards, jars and even cans of drink! She usually asks others to do such things now when she can.

Thelnebriati · 26/02/2020 16:07

When the DC's were little I couldn't afford 2 step through stairgates, so put the step through one at the top of the stairs, and an old step over one at the bottom. What could possibly go wrong?

What went wrong was that I slipped and landed badly. One of my labia had an enormous hematoma the size of an egg and the colour of an aubergine.

Elderflower14 · 26/02/2020 16:17

Just remembered two more.. Very drunk after a night out... Went to say goodnight to the dog who slept in the shed. Bent down to kiss him pitched forward and hit my face on the dog bed.(Made of chipboard) B In law had to pick me up and put me to bed. Black eye in the morning!
Filled up a hot water with boiling water... Put stopper in. Went to squeeze out between my arm and chest. Boiling water all over my arm!! 😔 😔 😔 😔 😔

NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace · 26/02/2020 16:25

As someone who is a bit bird phobic this sounds like a horror movie to me

@5foot5 it really was Shock I'm massively bird phobic and the blue tit had got into the bedroom one summer night. It settled down for the night so I was blissfully unaware of its presence when I went to bed. I woke up to find it flying around the room. My injuries were caused by me bounding out of bed and splattering straight into the wall in the manner of a cartoon character. My friend in the other bedroom sauntered in, opened the window and off flew my little friend Smile