Also Artemis why have you never voted?
Because there aren't any parties that I support, and politicians don't do what they say they want to do anyway. Rather than waste my time with going somewhere to vote, I go have a nice coffee instead.
So when you move in together will you pool your money?
If pooling means what I think it does, yeah.
I'll try to simplify a bit. Usually if people pick a character to represent them, it's because that character embodies the qualities they themselves like to believe they share.
Well, Artemis is my real name so that's how my username represents me. I'll let my parents know it's inappropriate 
Artemis was a hugely important goddess. She inspired awe and worship. She protected and nurtured others, rather than being protected herself; she was strong and powerful; and she was fiercely protective of her own chastity and purity.
I know.
I must go now but HTH and hope you recover quickly from your awful illness. flowers flowers sad flowers sad
Thank you. It's not an awful illness, though. Just a bad cold that I don't want to spread around at work.
You are, because the other things you can afford are because you don’t pay bills.
But that's not the definition of "taking advantage" as far as I know.
You may not see those things as bought by him, but you can only afford them because of him.
I never said I didn't see it as if my dad pays for everything (along with my fiancé). I very much do look at it like that, actually. But I just don't see it as a bad thing.
I really hope your siblings are equally subsidised
Of course. My dad doesn't pay for them anymore (because they don't want the help), but he has helped them, too, when they have accepted being helped.
For your own peace of mind and dignity, id start to pull back on this.
I'm not going to, but thanks for the advice.
Would vou have much reapect for your fiance if he accepted that you paid for everything, Artemis?
If I was willing and happy to do it and offered him this kind of arrangement myself, yes.
Yes you are. All your necessities are funded by someone else. Therefore allowing you to hoard your own money and spend it on you.
That's correct, yes.
Of course you're living out of the pockets of others. They are the ones allowing you to have so much spare cash.
Sure. I still don't see why that's a bad thing..
And I really don't agree with this whole 'well they offered so why not'.
That's fine, you don't have to agree with it when it comes to yourself. But I do.
Do you not want to feel any pride at all at paving your own way in life?
I am doing that in many ways. No one graduated for me, no one is doing my job for me, no one is pursuing my ambitions for me. I get supported so that I don't have to struggle unnecessarily, I don't see why that's such a bad thing.
Actually owning a house yourself? Not being funded by dad forever?
I could buy a house now if I wanted to. I don't want that sort of commitment at the moment, but in the future, sure.
Who's paying for your prescription? Surely you're not going to spend any of your own money?
lol I do spend my own money, just not on bills. I did pay for my own medication, don't worry
I'd personally begin resenting my husband pretty swiftly if he felt it was fine to let me pay for everything whilst I saved up my money to go travelling with. There's being instinctively selfish and then there's this...
So don't offer to him to pay all of your bills. Then he most likely won't let you pay for everything, right?
I understand where you are coming from because I have been in a similar position and when I was younger I thought it was great! It’s only now that I’m older and don’t own a thing because everything is in someone else’s name, that I am beginning to get afraid.
I totally understand that. But I'm not afraid, because I can buy my own house should I want or need to. And I have a very strong family unit to fall back on, I don't ever have to feel like I have to struggle by myself. I realise not everyone has that, but I wish they did. I'm sure many people wish they could rely on their family in times of need.
So much is pinned on your fiancé not leaving you.
Not really. It's not like I'm going to sleep under a bridge if he decides to leave me or kick me out. I wouldn't put myself in such a vulnerable position.
Your father not becoming ill or anything else.
Not really. My parents are financially set for life, as are me and my siblings pretty much.
Your brothers may have told you the same - I am from a cultural community where this is entirely normal, the men provide, the women have their own money for high days and holidays, until you have kids and then you will be a SAHM with an allowance.
Yes, it's common in my culture for men to be providers. That's why it's not a foreign thing for me that my dad and my fiancé take care of me. But I don't intend on being a SAH anything. In my country you get a salary while you're on maternity leave, so even then I would have an income.
It all seems so nice until someone can’t earn the money for you anymore. Where will your brothers be then? Earning for their own wives and asking why you spent their inheritance.
I have never asked my brother to spend their money on me, and I don't expect them to, either. I don't exactly fit the bill of the typical reliant-on-a-man woman. I'm not reliant on anybody. Should my dad and fiancé decide to stop what they are doing, it's not like I will end up on the street without a penny to my name. I do have a job and I have saved money for years. I could pay my own ways if I had to. But that's the thing, I don't have to.
*ArtemisOfOrtygia two things strike me about your posts
- You come across as very smug, which is why you're getting a roasting on here. I wouldn't want to be in your position, I value my independence too much, but there will be jealousy that you were given the opportunity to be in this position to begin with.*
I'm sorry to hear I come off as smug, but I'm not trying to. I think I'm being very calm and upfront about my situation, that's all. I don't mind getting a roasting, I enjoy talking to people and it's always interesting to hear other perspectives. I don't necessarily take them on board but that's another matter.
And it's fine that you wouldn't want to be in my shoes, I most likely wouldn't want to be in your's, either
I'm not sure what kind of independence you think you have and I don't, but it'd be interesting to know.
2. I hope that you're prepared for the inevitable day when reality slaps you in the face and you have to provide for yourself.
I'm always prepared for the worst. I'm not a very huge risk taker, which is why you are not going to see me become a trophy wife or SAHM. I don't want to put myself in a position where I'll be left with nothing if I suddenly stop having the privileges that I have now. As it is now, I'm building my career, earning and saving money all while being taken care of. If the taken care of part becomes no longer part of the equation, I will still have my career, earnings and saved money.
If anyone has seen the Godfather, the gradual move of Connie from care free petted younger sister and daughter, to bitter and dependant older woman, is a stark lesson not to take money from family! sad
I have not seen Godfather.