To ask were you smacked by your parents as a child, and do you forgive them now?

[blubberball]

I was smacked by my parents as a child. Sometimes they would completely lose their shit and smack me over and over, whilst shouting at me. Each syllable would be a smack. I remember wanting my dm to stop talking, so that she would stop hitting me. I remember being in the street and my dm taking a swing at my arse, and I managed to move to dodge it.

I guess it stopped at the "appropriate" age. 10 or something.

I have never smacked my dc, and would use time outs to discipline them. My parents moved with the times and followed my lead. I forgive them, and they are very loving and supportive now. It's strange to think that happened now.

Nothing to forgive. They were bringing me up properly. That's a good thing.

Yes and yes. Honestly don't think anything of it, it was always well deserved IMHO. It's the emotional abuse from my mother I struggle with forgiving.

I forgive them for hitting me but I will never forgive them for allowing my much older sibling to hit me (slap me/trip me/sit on me/grab me/hurl abuse at me) at will.

I deserved most of them.

I was smacked. Always in temper.

It was humiliating and unnecessary.

I’m not sure whether forgiveness has ever come into it. I have a difficult relationship with my parents anyway and this is just part of it.

I was smacked but felt it was because they had lost their temper rather than disciplining me. Same as when my husband was violent towards me.

I was smacked but felt it was because they had lost their temper rather than disciplining me. Same as when my husband was violent towards me.

I am of the rather controversial opinion that a quick smack (not repeated venting of anger by smacking as you describe) is potentially less harmful than screaming or yelling at a child. Particularly when parents label the child rather than the behaviour (you are such an idiot, rather than that was an idiotic thing to do, eg).
So I don't hold those few smacked bottoms in response to me doing things I had been told not to against my parents. It stopped before I was 5 and I was never slapped, kicked, dragged or pulled all of which are very different in my mind.

Yes and yes. Honestly don't think anything of it, it was always well deserved IMHO. It's the emotional abuse from my mother I struggle with.

Yes and yes. Honestly don't think anything of it, it was always well deserved IMHO. It's the emotional abuse from my mother I struggle with forgiving.

I deserved most of them.

I was smacked and I don't see any reason that they would need my forgiveness as it taught me valuable lessons about right and wrong at the time

Yes I was smacked occasionally. I undoubtedly deserved it! No forgiveness needed.

Nothing to forgive. They were bringing me up properly. That's good thing.

Now I can understand the smacking, it was the thick leather belt up and down my legs I can't forgive. This was the time mini skirts were the norm.

I was smacked and I don't see any reason that they would need my forgiveness as it taught me valuable lessons about right and wrong at the time

I deserved most of them.

Nothing to forgive as I dont remember being smacked and only know because my mother told she smacked me, she was a great mum and we I dont forgive my grandmother for thumping me repeatedly on the back because my sister fell off her trike and she blamed me. She was a horrible woman and I have no good memories of her

I was very definitely threatened with a smacked bottom if I didn't behave but I can't for the life of me remember if it happened.

I am not hugely forgiving of some of the atmospheres of nerves that were far more scary and memorable than a slap on the bum to me.

My mum had severe mental health difficulties - still does - and it's hard to know how I feel in relation to my dad, who chose not to remove us from that situation. But it's not straight-forward. He would almost certainly lost access to my half-siblings who weren't his.

If I were making wishes, I'd have wanted him to stand up to her more, not let us be the victims of her difficulties.

I can forgive the smacking as that was discipline in that era, but what I can't forgive was the thick leather belt up and down my legs. This was at the time when mini skirts were the norm. Mum smacked, dad the leather belt. But mum knew what he would do by telling him if me or my brother were naughty even though she had already smacked.

My mother stopped hitting me when I hit her back. Quite recently she told me that she hit me more than my siblings because I "was more annoying than the others". So not "to teach me right from wrong" or any of the other crap excuses for physical abuse on this thread. She did it because she wanted to and she could. She stopped when it became inconvenient. I do find it hard to forgive, yes. I don't trust her with my dc.

I'm really not aware of any act a 2 or 3 year old could do which would justify being hit.

My mother stopped hitting me when I hit her back. Quite recently she told me that she hit me more than my siblings because I "was more annoying than the others". So not "to teach me right from wrong" or any of the other crap excuses for physical abuse on this thread. She did it because she wanted to and she could. She stopped when it became inconvenient. I do find it hard to forgive, yes. I don't trust her with my dc.

I'm really not aware of any act a 2 or 3 year old could do which would justify being hit.

Yes I was smacked. I don't see there is anything to forgive BUT Sometimes they would completely lose their shit and smack me over and over, whilst shouting at me. Each syllable would be a smack. - this is way beyond anything I experienced.

A smack in our home was a warning it was coming if we didn't behave, followed by a singular planned event performed by a parent that was not lost to rage. I think that makes a big difference, at least to me.

I was smacked occasionally but never in the way you describe op. I had a happy, loving childhood. I occasionally smacked my dc when they were younger.

Child of the 70s. There is nothing to forgive. You would have been in an absolute minority if you didn't receive the odd smack. We also had corporal punishment in my primary & secondary school. One lad was regularly walloped with a plimsoll, you could be smacked with a wooden ruler and our maths teacher was a crack shot with a board rubber. Another teacher washed our mouths out with soap & water when we were 6 as someone in the class fibbed about something. That's worse.