Is husband being unreasonable about baby's needles

[bigmamama]

Hi so me and my husband are currently at logger heads about taking our 6mo for his needles which is tomorrow.
So basically he has missed his needles as he was poorly when they were due at 3 months old, he was in hospital with bronchiolitis and it just kept getting put on the back burner as he had virus after virus and spent a bit of time in and out of hospital over the Xmas period and was sent for some tests to check all was ok. And it was. so now his needles are due tomorrow and my husband has said he doesn't want the baby to have them as he thinks it will set him back, make him poorly, he's too small, he thinks the government are just trying to scare monger people into having them done etc.
I want the baby to have his needles especially since our 3yo has had them done! I really don't want to take the baby to get them behind his back but he's not budging on this!

I presume you mean vaccinations/inoculations. He does need to have them and they are performed very quickly, your baby will not suffer.

Just take him, tell husband afterwards. He is either over empathising or projecting his own fear of needles onto his child.

I've just read back a bit and I too thought 'needles' was an odd way to describe vaccinations. I've never heard it before and I'm from, and live in, South London. I have heard 'jabs'.

I do 'get' that it is probably unfair to criticise the op but she did use 'needles' four times in her opening post which is a bit much!

Anyway, we've all got the message. The important thing is for the baby to have vaccinations now.

I’d just ignore him and take the baby and get them done. His feelings don’t matter. What matters is the baby getting his vaccinations as timeously as possible.

And I would totally expect my husband to do the same and tell me not to be ridiculous if I ever took leave of my senses and adopted an anti vaxxer stance.

I presume you mean vaccinations/inoculations

I think after 11 pages of this we have firmly established that now fgs!!

If u were offered the vaccine that prevents RSV which commonly causes Bronc would he say yes (unless your child has underlying health issues he won't be eligible)... but may make you husband realise how ridiculous he's being. He no doubt would want to prevent Bronc again if he could and what the vaccines are for are often much more serious

I wouldn't do it behind his back. I'd flatly tell him your child is having them and that's the end of the discussion

Lol. Wonder why jabs is more acceptable than needles?

'It must really hard to disagree on this'

Seems easy to me. The parent who wants to get their baby the proper medical care recommended by the NHS wins.

So he missed his diphtheria, hepatitis B, Haemophilus influenzae type b, polio, tetanus, whooping cough, PVC and MenB vaccinations? And your DH believes the baby is better off not being protected against those diseases? Google what any of those will do to a small baby - does he really want to risk with that?

And it's not an argument that they are rare. Most of them are contageus, meaning that the more people like your BIL we have around, the more likely the infections. Samoa measles epidemy is a good example what happens when people no longer vaccinate.

Op would you ever forgive yourself or your husband if your child dies because of your hesitation to vaccinate?

Children die because of these decisions- children who are very much loved and cared for and are vulnerable to disease and cannot have them themselves

And the children of people who think there’s some huge government conspiracy and think they know more than the scientists who live and breath making and researching these vaccines.

Your husband is gullible, that’s not an opinion- it is a fact.
Gullibility should not be a killer, but it is.

Maybe show him the video from Mayo Clinic called infant girl with whooping cough.

Any parent that would be prepared to watch their child in that state is absolutely insane.

I never had to have a debate about jabs/needles/immunisations/whatever with DH. He is in his mid 50s, from rural North Africa and two of his siblings died from disease before the age of 10. That is the grim reality of what poor access to vaccines mean.

I’m sure there are equally heartbreaking videos online you can show him of children suffering from the other wretched diseases we can now protect them from.

I caught whooping cough as an adult (my mum didn't get me vaccinated). It was horrible. It's even worse for tiny babies. Get the vaccinations done ASAP.

*Everyone spouting that the child’s health comes before the husbands wishes are failing to recognise that the baby has been ill for months and may not be well enough to cope with the vaccinations right now.

OP I would strongly recommend getting your child vaccinated, however I would also strongly recommend waiting until your baby is completely recovered from the pre existing viruses*

Don’t you think the people involved in the baby’s medical care are in the best position to advise whether the vaccines are OK to go ahead now? Presumably if they felt there was a risk in doing so they’d also be advising to wait?

My baby was in intensive care with Bronc before Christmas at 8 weeks old. I was told that the day I was discharged from hospital she would be well enough to have vaccinations. That was from a consultant. Vaccines are v important and he urged us not to delay

Lots of older people call them needles where I'm from. I usually refer to them as "vaccines" but I never thought it weird to call them needles. People always said to my kids "did you get your needles?"
Just to counter the horror stories I would like to say I have a mother who feared vaccines. I know, the horror. I got whooping cough at about 9 months and came through unscathed. I had measles at about 7 and came through that too. Before I got pregnant they tested me for rubella immunity and I have it somehow. I recall lots of kids being out of school for weeks because of measles or mumps or rubella. I don't know why there were so many unvaccinated kids at the time. But I don't recall any having any long term effects.
I'm not anti vax. My kids are vaccinated. It's just some of the anger here.
OP I think trust would be lost between you if you do it regardless of his wishes. If he's happy to, I would book the appointment for the two of you to discuss with doctor as soon as possible. Your husband can have a list of concerns/questions ready and the doctor will be able to answer them. Your husband will feel listened to and I'm fairly sure the doctor will convince him that getting them is the right thing to do.

Book an appointment with the doctor before hand to have a check up. Explain to the doctor you just need to make sure your baby is well enough for their injections. The doctor will check their chest, throat, ears etc, and probably say “yes”. I had a son who had constant chest and throat infections. I had to do this twice. 2nd time he was well enough for the injections!

Bloody hell, people- vaccines are sometimes referred to as needles. Get over it.

I don't usually comment and lurk instead but for the love of God will people stop going on about the term needles. It's so common in the NW. it isn't triggering the OPs husband. Just leave it!
I reckon I've read 3 constructive posts on this thread and most of them were from the OP.

(by the way I think your idea to rebook for next week and take DH is probably best all round)

‘Needles’ well I never

I wouldn't go behind dh's back and have them done secretly. But I would put my foot down, tell him I was taking baby to have them done and then go and get them sorted.

If your dc has no current illness and there are no medical condition which the hospital consultants have said means they can't have them, then I would not be putting my child at risk of these preventable illnesses.

Don't you just love the way that, despite global media, language is still so regional in this country?

For the person a few pages back, polio hasn't been given orally for over 10 years in UK. It's part of a combined vaccine that includes diphtheria and tetanus.

Take you husband to an appointment with your GP. Have a calm and rational discussion about the safety and benefits of the childhood vaccinations. Then get your baby vaccinated for the sake of his health and for those he will mix with in the future.

As someone who had a very serious case of one of the diseases we now vaccinate against - which left me with lifelong disabilities - GET HIM VACCINATED. The vaccine didn’t exist when I was a child so I was unlucky, but if it had and I now had to live with the knowledge that I’m disabled because my parents were dicking around over protecting me... well, I can’t even imagine how I’d feel. Please, get it done.

How the hell do you unpleasant people who can't cope with "needles" cope with the outside world?

Or, have you never travelled outside of your village?

Shame on you for belittling, correcting and mocking someone for being different to you.
Such small mindedness.