Very "technical" compliments from a colleague

[Yesiwearspandex]

Today's first world problem.

There is a colleague in the office (female, early 50s) who likes to give LOUD compliments on other women's appearances but in a very "technical" way, i.e. highlighting the way how they achieved a particular look rather than just saying they look great.
For example: "oh you had your eyebrows plucked, looks nice".
Or "wow, mascara today, any special plans for the evening?"
Or "this new foundation you are wearing really suits you, your skin looks perfect".
Or "you dyed your hair, it suits you".
Or "what a dress, and that shapewear really rocks too".
The team is predominantly middle aged men, with just a few women of different ages here and there, and all her comments seem to be targeted at women.
AIBU to read too much into it, as in it being a bit bitchy? On one hand, she seems to be saying nice things, on another, I feel weird myself when she comments on something that I hope will go unnoticed (such as foundation or shapewear), almost like I am under a constant surveillance from some sort of a beauty police. Maybe because I don't usually notice if someone had changed their foundation or is wearing mascara, but just notice that they look good.

I say that sort of thing and I'm not being bitchy. I mean it.

Shapewear comment is definitely bitchy.

Hair dye not so much (unless it was supposed to look particularly natural/just cover Grey's)

@BadCatDirtyCat
Yes, it this case it was someone dyeing greying black into black.

Not everyone is sophisticated in their delivery of compliments, stop looking to be offended and just accept the comments graciously.

Some people just have a technical mind.

Sounds like trying to disguise a bitchy comment to me!

I think she sounds bitchy. She's deliberately drawing attention to something done discreetly to improve your appearance: hair dyed a natural colour, foundation, shapewear etc. She's constantly highlighting to the men in the office that your 'natural' look is fake.

Is she competitive in other ways?

Is she socially awkward in any other way? It's hard to tell just from a post but it sounds like maybe she's had some advice in how to relate to other women along the lines of finding something specific to be positive about and has taken it a bit far.

Mm. I’m undecided. Some are compliments, with no edge imo, like the foundation, or if you’d had a drastic hair colour change or highlights or something. The shapewear, fucking rude. The greying black into black... a bit of an edge.

She could be being bitchy, but if she is she’s doing it in a way that gives her plausible deniability.

Bright and breezy “I know, don’t I look FABULOUS! If you’re looking to give yourself a bit of TLC I can tell where I got it done/bought my Spanx/let you borrow my tweezers”

Plus she might just be really into makeup and beauty? I am, a bit, and would comment if someone had their eyebrows shaped or was using a nice new foundation or mascara, and would really appreciate compliments back.
I’m getting splinters I’m so on the fence here 😂

It's the "loud" that's the issue. A quiet "I notice you've used a new foundation and it looks amazing. Where do you get it?" Would be a genuine compliment.

Loudly pointing out something that is designed to be discreet, even under the guise of a compliment, is tactless at best.

It's very rude and would make me self-concious.

I don’t think I would be quite so technical but often comment that a shape or style suits someone or a colour of clothing make up or hair dye

I am myself undecided. She is not competitive, but she's the office flirt / queen bee (not that there are ANY romantic vibes around).
Maybe it is just difficult to convey the situation via the text. The foundation comment was to someone with a severe case of facial acne which flares up from time to time (who had professional make up lessons on how to mask it).

It sounds intrusive to me- I wouldn't tell people I was wearing shapewear (is that those lump- smoothing pants?) Or that I had plucked my eyebrows, so I wouldn't like someone else to announce it to my colleagues. I agree that it sounds like she is either really bad at compliments or she is trying to embarrass people by pointing out their attempts to hide their (perceived) flaws. Could you tell her that you aren't comfortable with her commenting on your appearance or would that be too awkward?

I had to laugh at the shapewear. Isn't it supposed to be invisible?

I think this could be read two ways. Either she is a bit awkward and has taken advice on how to compliment people i.e be specific rather than general and is taking it a bit far (like the shapewear comment ) might also explain why she's loud and not very subtle. Or it's meant in an undermining, intending to embarrass way. That would have to considered in more context: what is she like generally as a person?

Yep, it's nasty imo. More of a backhanded compliment.

Is she socially awkward in any other way?
No, if I am honest, it is everyone else in the team who is socially awkward (we are in a very technical area and she has some "social" duties, being our boss's PA).

See, that foundation thing. It really could be one of two things; she’s either being genuinely nice and trying to boost their confidence seeing as they’ve gone to trouble to work on their make up and the application of... or she’s being a cow and drawing attention to it.
I don’t know.
To be honest, I’d say thanks if it seemed like a nice thing, but the Spanx for example, I’d probably say ‘er thanks... don’t be so weird commenting on my underwear!’ and just gauge her reaction. Or just ignore it entirely.

Reading your update, I might be inclined to go with option 2!

People cant win, shes saying something nice and being complimentary how can that be negative?

"oh you had your eyebrows plucked, looks nice", = You're so hairy normally, let's not forget!
Or "wow, mascara today, any special plans for the evening?", = You have such thin lashes.
Or "this new foundation you are wearing really suits you, your skin looks perfect", = Really hides your terrible skin. Acne klaxon!
Or "you dyed your hair, it suits you", = You're old. Just making sure everyone knows.
Or "what a dress, and that shapewear really rocks too", = You're fat. There's no fooling anybody

If she likes to be the queen been it sounds like she is doing it to reinforce the own status as "the best" -us other mere mortals need to resort to makeup and the like yo look better and she wants everyone to know it, she meanwhile is always naturally fabulous, or so she wants all or her (imaginary) make fan club to believe. There is no reason to make such loud announcements otherwise. She sounds odd and very annoying. I think I'd have to make some kind of comment in return, I'm sure you and your colleagues can find something...."have you had a hearing test lately?...weve noticed your voice is getting so much louder these days, you probably dont realise, you really should book in"😂..obviously must be announced loudly to ensure she can hear it!colleagues must all loudly agree in front of team!