The Toilet Seat Saga

[Rosebyanothername19]

Basically my husband and I have an ongoing dispute over the downstairs toilet. I have asked him a million times to put the lid down after he uses it - which is about every half hour...

I have sent him links to articles about hygiene and also put a large note on top of the toilet asking nicely to put the lid down in case he just forgets. I have pointed our that our baby is going to be crawling soon and, as the downstairs loo is between the living room and kitchen, she is probably going to end up in there numerous times.

Every request is met with an eye roll and him saying that's it's not a big deal or just ignored.

So tonight I have decided that every time he leaves the lid up I will empty a beer down the sink and leave the bottle upside down. I haven't told him this and I'm just going to start doing it and wait until he asks or realises what is going on.

AIBU?

That seems a bit of a waste and a bit ott tbh. It's not that big a deal? I'm sure you could get an automatic lid closer if it bothers you that much.

Bit drastic

I understand that it's frustrating but emptying his beer sounds a bit ott. I think if a woman posted that she kept forgetting to do something so her DH destroyed something of hers each time she forget then posters would be telling her to run for the hills.

That seems a bit of a waste and a bit ott tbh

I agree. Drink it instead

I once charged dh $5 every time he lay in bed and complained that I wasn’t getting up quickly enough to tend to dd. Sometimes I am a fan of the extravagant gesture.

I've checked and they are about £150. Unless you know of a cheap alternative? Also it might be OTT but I'm at the end of my tether. It's such a simple request and I am just ignored!

YANBU to get annoyed with your DH, but YABVU to pour away perfectly good beer. What a waste! Find something else to do to annoy him instead. When he plugs his phone in to charge it, leave the lead in the phone and turn it off at the mains each time so he thinks it’s charging but his phone keeps on running out of battery. That’s what I did with my DH when he wouldn’t get the message about something. He soon got the message!

I don't get the fuss

If I'm confronted with a loo with the lid down I'm always worried about what horrors I might find when I lift it.

We are very much a lid up household. The only time it's down is when someone sits on it to cut their toenails.

Perfect, Angus!

I agree with @DramaAlpaca though. I’m actually always pleased when I go into a bathroom and don’t have to lift the lid. The less stuff I have to touch the better!

@shuuush I totally see your point but he isnt forgetting, he is ignoring my request. There is a note on the cistern so unless he pees with his eyes shut (which wouldnt surprise me judging by the mess sometimes) then he is doing it in purpose.

Any alternative suggestions?

I have pointed our that our baby is going to be crawling soon and, as the downstairs loo is between the living room and kitchen, she is probably going to end up in there numerous times.

Surely it's more important to shut the door?

Why do you feel the need for the lid to be down?
Yes, it stops germs spreading when you flush, I get that, but to complain on MN about it seems a bit OTT.
That you have an issue with your partner about it seems bizarre, quite frankly.

Why should he?

That's kinda where I am with it. You want it closed, then close it!

Tell him to pee in a bucket in the garden.

You put a sign on the cistern?

The lid, or the seat?

Is no one else worried about the germs that get sprayed around your bathroom when you flush the toilet with the lid up??

I appreciate it is a waste but A) its little bottles of Budweiser not proper beer and B) I suspect he wouldnt do it too often once he got the message that I'm serious.

Glue a cork to the back of the toilet, then the lid can't stay up.
Or just shut the door to keep (soon to be) mobile baby out

I suspect now that it's become such a big deal he's going to deliberately leave it up! Ex DH used to moan about the cutlery being in the 'right sections' of the drawer- the more times he went on about the damn cutlery drawer the more times I deliberately put the cutlery in the 'wrong' bloomin place. I'd let this one go honestly, putting a note on the toilet is just silly.

I have three children, I had a loo in-between the lounge and kitchen. Not once did any of them crawl in there.

He is ignoring you because he thinks you are being completely unreasonable.

I'm with you OP. It's unhygenic to flush with the lid open so it should be closed before he flushes anyway.

If it’s only wee, I don’t think you’ll catch any dreadful airborne disease from it. And your baby won’t fall ill from occasionally touching the loo, they’ll be too busy eating snails or something else disgusting. Just shut the door if that’s what bothers you.

It just seems kind of controlling to me.
I mean you're going to waste a perfectly good drink each time he doesn't do as he's told.

And no i don't have any alternative suggestions. I have a downstairs bathroom and If I go in and the seats up I put it down.
I also managed to keep 3 toddlers away from it over the years by keeping the door closed. 🤷‍♀️

You're going to pour a beer down the sink every couple of hours but can't afford £150?