Kids party cf’ers

[Partychaos]

Nc for this.
Dd 5 was invited to a kids party today at the local softplay.
Proper invitation sent “you are invited to X at Y time to celebrate Z’s 5th birthday.

Several class mates have had a party at the same place and normally they have an hour on the softplay, then go to a ‘party room’ for what ever the theme is and have party food and drinks and then 30 minutes play and then back to the big table set up for adults, birthday cake/presents to get shoes, coats and a party bag. And the kids wait there if parents are picking up.

Dh took her. Arrived at the softplay and they have the gates that you need to sign in and out and pay. Dh stood in the queue to sign dd in. Man going up and down the queue saying is anyone here for Z’s party. Dh confirmed he was and the man came and stood with dh and dd and explained he was Z’s dad and would sign them in. They got to the front and the dad tapped his card to pay for dd and then continued wandering up and down the line.
When they went in it wasn’t a Booked party different parents from school were sitting at different tables. It’s a Saturday the place was rammed. The kids went and played on the softplay and just nothing happened. After an hour dd came out with 3 friends and needed a drink. None of her friends parents had stayed. Dh went asked the dad where the drinks were for the kids and apparently he just looked bemused and said well there’s a cafe over there. Dh asked what about the kids that didn’t have parents with them where were they meant to get the money from. The dad just shrugged and walked away.
Dh went to the cafe and bought all 4 girls and himself lunch and drinks (party was 11-2 and by 12.30 they were starrrrrrrrrving) a few other parents did the same for their kids and everyone sat and had lunch at different tables.
Dh phoned me to tell me what was going on and saying he was tempted to grab dd and leave but was genuinely concerned if the parents would wait for parents to come and do the pick up. I phoned two of the girls parents and told them that it wasn’t a booked party and not to worry dh had bought her kid a drink and some food but they might want to go and stay with their dd’s. I don’t have contact details of the third parent.
One of the mums went straight to the soft play and justifiably (I think) kicked off at the parents. The parents couldn’t see the problem and just kept repeating that they had paid £5.95 a head what more did she want from them.
Dh has came back £30 lighter and with a disappointed dd that there were no party bags or cake, and the class what’s app is going absolutely wild!
The whole thing just sounds absolutely bat shit crazy.

I don't think it's that bad except for the no food/drink thing??

The parents were still there to watch the kids and the party-goers were having fun in the softplay.

I would never expect a host parent to supervise and be responsible for my child at one of these party factory places...theres just too many kids, it's too manic and noisy and kids running in different directions. How are they supposed to make sure their own child, the party child is having a good time if they are running around after 10 or so other 4 or 5 year olds. Really irresponsible of the parents to leave 4 or 5 year olds in this situation. We never ever left ours. These things are only ever a couple of hours, just stay and keep an eye on them, make sure they get to the party room when called, and sit at the table. At all these events, (we've been to loads), the majority of the parents stay and wander into the food room to make sure they sit down and eat etc.. there was only ever one parent who didnt and she was talked about.."she's left him again!" and such like...he used to walk round crying saying "where's my Mum?" at most parties.

I've had totally different experiences with my two DDs - I think different cohorts of parents just do it differently.

DD1 has always had parties with parents staying. She's 8 now, and parents still stay... but probably more for a good chat and catch-up! We've all spent so much time at each others' parties that we've become quite a friendly bunch :) She's def old enough now to take herself to the toilet and sort out her own lunch/drink from a buffet, so I'll probably start leaving her soon. Does still depend on the venue tho.

In contrast, at DD2's first party after starting school (turning 5), parents were trying to drop and run. These were 4 year olds, who I'd never met before and who had never been to my house before. I said that they needed to stay, and everyone was fine about it. A year later, now I know most of the kids (and they know me), I'll be ok with them dropping and running for a party at home. But if we were out at a softplay, there's no way I would agree.

I think as it was held at lunchtime you would definitely expect food to be provided.If they could not afford it they should have gone outside of meal times and been upfront about what was happening. My children are grown up now, but thinking about it one of them did go to a “party”at the cinema which was just children’s Saturday morning film showing but at least all the children and birthday child’s parents sat together and they did take them to Mac Donald’s afterwards(and pay for them at both places).

At most soft play areas you can buy jugs of juice for £1.50. They could have at least made sure all children had drinks. I feel sorry for birthday child tbh. They mist realise they did not have cake and everyone singing and blowing out candles. Good job your dh was there to rescue the children without parents. He sounds a very kind person.

My dd did my dgs party at soft play but was a booked party for whole class and a few others. Both me and dh went down with adult son to help at party and make sure all children were having fun and ok. My dd said she did not think just her and her dh were enough given the number of children.

Wow OP - I'm astonished! YANBU
I would be furious to discover this about a "party" I had just dropped my DC at.
I personally always stay with my children at parties; I just dont trust anyone else.

My DS's 10 and 5 get soooo sweaty after just 30 minutes of soft play. How can the party childs parents NOT provide even just juice/water for ALL the children?!
What if all the other parents had just dropped off their children?! Would birthday girl be sat with a drink and snack while everyone else stood around and watched?! Its cruel and thoughtless!
Bad parenting in my opinion! 🙄

As for the person who said; your child shouldn't expect a party bag... seriously?!
Do you even have children?! Have you ever been to a childs party?! Party bags are a MUST! 🙄

yanbu

I never leave DD though

Normally a soft play party means the hosts have booked the place out exclusively. The hosts then know all children are they're responsibility if parents have not stayed. I would feel out of my depth at a 5 year old's party where I hardly knew any kids and they were mixed in with other unknown kids too. At the very least they should have reserved a table and had some drinks and food. If no party bag, then take a piece of cake home each.