Bloke who I gave a BJ too has moved close to us

[Sixteenbars]

Sorry TMI!
When I was 17 I was experimenting sexually and gave a random guy a BJ at a house party. Turns out his best mate was actually going to end up as my dp and the father of my two dc's.
Quite soon after we got together dp fell out with this friend, partly due to... that, Partly due to the friend saying dp had changed since we started going out (17 and we thought we were so deep!)
Now the guy has quite innocently bought a house opposite our dd's school, on the next road down from us. I've already bumped into him twice (no acknowledgement from either of us.) Should I mention it to DP? I think he'd laugh but also (strangely) might get a bit paranoid?

@BillieEilish so, should she have dumped him, slept with dozens of men and then regretted it? some people meet 'the one' early on.

Absolute storm in a teacup, the only person (apart from my current boyfriend) i have had sex with is my best friend, when you’re an adult there’s nothing wrong/awkward about it. You gave him a BJ, you didn’t murder his family.

You are really really overthinking this, I thought you were a teenager by the way you wrote your OP. My ex-husband came to my Wedding, adults are capable of moving on from people they were once intimate with.

@MaryShelley1818 my exH says he wants to give me away if I remarry. Well, I say give, his words were "I'll actually fucking pay them to make sure you've gone" Good job I know he adores me really

@nanna50 aye

You are not responsible for your DP's friendship breaking down. It's been a long time and their personalities sound quite opposed. If it wasn't you, it would have been something else. Teenaged friends drift apart for many reasons - not least of which the passage of time. It's not your fault; give yourself permission to let it go. x

Seriously? 15 years ago and you're getting your knickers in a knot? 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️

I think it's safer just to mention it to DP, I'm sure nobody remembers/cares anymore but he might be bothered if he thinks you are hiding things from him- it makes it a big deal when it's not a big deal

Yes to grow up.
Why are you even making a big deal of this?

Your title is also very attention seeking.

Definitely no need to worry about it. Honestly (and I know this sounds bad) he may not even remember/recognise you. I once had a very awkward conversation at an old school friend's wedding with some guy who was acting as if he was an old friend and I did not recognize at all. I was later reminded we'd had a drunken one night stand years previously.

i would tell your DP.

A friend of mine had some guy she went on a date and shagged 15 years ago move in opposite her and start at her gym! she didnt tell her DP (and we dont think hes told his wife) and its now mega awkward for her at all mutual neighbours BBQs etc. She also now feels she cant tell DH as its gone too far.

Being a woman of a certain age, if everyone turned up at the front door who l had given a blowie to since l was 17, they might need to call security to control the numbers.

But l don’t fall out with people post-sex, l would say hello to all of them in the street and have a social coffee or glass of wine.

I certainly don’t owe anyone else an explanation as to how I know them.

Stealth boast StarlightLady?

With all due respect OP he won't be bothered about you at all.

He might feel awkward seeing his old friend though.

Style it out next time you see him - give him a wink and a smile!

He is unlikely to recognise you unless you have a distinctive hair parting 🤣

@Ginfordinner - The comment was tongue in cheek! . Make of that what you will!

Blimey, I deal on a professional level
With someone I shagged 27 years ago.

It’s like it never happened. Move in, it’s old news and nothing.

Wow this is very dramatic.

Last year I bumped into a guy I shagged as a teen. I told DH and we all went to the pub a week later (they went to the same school). Not awkward at all because we are adults...

I really don’t understand why you have an issue, OK I’m a bloke and possibly not the best person to take advice from but something that happened 15 years ago when you were in your teens .... of course you should mention it to DP but make sure you tell him that neither of you acknowledged each other

Remember at the end of the day your DP got the girl !

You do realise a lot of people have to see people they've slept with or otherwise had sexual relations with? I see one every week when he picks up our daughter. What a weird thing to even spent time thinking about. I doubt be even remembers or thinks about it

@FarTooSkinny

You need to normalise it by mentioning it to your DP most days. And mention the size of his member. Use the word girth.

I’m only 22 and this wouldn’t phase me. Most people have had more than 1 relationship in their life, so having exes that you’ve slept with before comes with the territory - as an adult you have to be mature and not dwell on the awkwardness if you happen to regularly see them.

In fact, chances are that the bloke won’t make you feel awkward. I actually think men handle this quite well considering that they usually have ridiculously high body counts - eg the rugby team at my university have probably slept with over 100 women each, including half of our university year and manage to see all these people every day without issue.

It’s faze, not phase.

Yes, give me a but I’m only saying it because so many people don’t know this.

It’s faze.

Phase is a period of time.
Faze is to disconcert.

🤣🤣🤣🤣