to not of let this woman touch my baby

[flower1994]

had a really strange experience (in my opinion) happen in large supermarket earlier. was walking around with my 10 week old daughter in her pram when this older woman I would say in her 70s appeared out of nowhere and said rather consistently "you must do me a favour. you must let me touch the baby. you must let me touch her!" I was quite freaked out by this and backed off, turned my daughter away and said no. she asked rather aggressively "why not?" I said because I dont know you and she looked at me disgusted, stormed off whilst saying "the generation of today"

was I unreasonable to say no and be freaked out by this?

not sure if this is a generation thing or if people allow random strangers to touch their babies who are this young but I have to say I found it seriously odd!

Most of mumsnet will say you have to book an appointment to have any contact with a baby but I couldn’t give a fuck seriously.

That does sound very unnerving. I don't agree with the whole mentality of not wanting people to look at/speak to babies etc, and hold them if it's friends and family, but for random strangers asking to touch your baby, that's just odd. It would be different if she'd come and asked to have a look, but wanting to touch, I'd have said no as well.

Old ladies love babies. Soooo yabu and precious and rude!!

Your reaction was spot on. I once had a woman telling me off for not letting her snot-caked toddler clamber on my small baby, whom I was carrying in a car seat. He ‘just wanted to kiss her’, you see.

Yanbu at all

YANBU.

YANBU I once let a lady like this touch DS1, she then stuck her dirty looking finger in his mouth
Well done for saying no to something you were not comfortable with.

Old ladies and gentlemen regularly touched my newborns' cheeks in Tesco. DH and I would have bets on if it was going to happen. She shouldn't have become aggressive when you told her you didn't want her touching your baby though.

Must add I did love people chatting to my babies. You can appreciate someone's baby without touching them!

yanbu

I mean I would of understood if we had actually had any form of conversation prior (again not sure would of wanted a random stranger actually touching her when shes still so young) but it was the way she suddenly appeared out of nowhere and the insistence of it "you must do me a favour, you must let me touch the baby" know it sounds a bit germaphobe but you dont know where a strangers hands have been either

It was a pretty weird thing for her to say. And to demand an explanation from you as to why you wouldn't let her. And if someone said that to me, I'd almost certainly have said no as well.

But on the other hand, I have never understood the complete horror that so many people have of anyone touching their baby. When mine were babies so many people just reached in and stroked their cheek, and I honestly never thought anything of it.

A lot of people love babies, the whole circle of life thing. People love to stroke their wee cheek, or hold their wee hand, and since babies tend to like being touched, it's not as if they find it upsetting. I've never heard of a baby actually being injured or become ill by someone just touching them. (Although I wouldn't be letting random people kiss a baby, that would be a step too far even for a laid back mother like me).

Because it happened very unnaturally, you were right not to let her touch her.

It's virus and flu season, anyone should understand a parent not wanting their under six month old being touched.

Not letting a stranger touch her baby is not being precious and rude. The woman demanding to touch the baby by saying you must let me touch the baby would surely be unnerving to anyone. Babies are not objects that people can demand to touch.

I had a little old lady pathetically grateful when I let her lean into the pram, and stoke my baby's cheek.

But if I'd had someone aggressively stating I must let her touch my baby, I think all my instincts would have said to tell her she can fuck right off.

Nobody ever randomly touched my two when they were babies, I feel like they missed out.
Sometimes you bump into strange people when you are out and about i wouldn't worry about it.

Someone approached and touched me recently and It was very disconcerting, there are some nutters out there. You were right not to let a random person near dc.

YADNBU but at least she asked. When DC1 was very tiny - less than a month old - a random old woman grabbed her hand, yanked it up and down and then squeezed her cheek and made her cry. She never spoke to me during the whole thing, which happened so fast I couldn’t stop her.

I adore babies but I would never touch anyone’s baby or ask to touch them. It’s f**king weird.

YANBU. Maybe your baby would have loved it maybe she wouldn’t and there’s probably no harm in finding out most of the time, but it’s entirely up to you. The entitlement that so many random people display towards babies (and pregnant women) is a bit shocking and I would have been put off by that alone.

“ know it sounds a bit germaphobe”

Not at all. A neighbour recently had a baby, if I see them coming out of the flats when I’ve just been on the Tube, I don’t touch the baby. When they come round, it’s different of course.

I think that's what it was, just the way she came out of nowhere and was so insisting, just made me feel a bit on edge which is why I said no as an initial reaction

Absolutely batshit.

She is not you lol

That’s weird imo. I’m more strict than usual because coronavirus is in the UK now and frankly I don’t want my DC catching it because some random wanted to touch him.

Old ladies love babies.

I'm in my 70s, well very early 70s and I can assure you that no, not all 'old ladies' love other people's babies.

I'm not interested, don't even notice them and certainly wouldn't want to touch one.

Old women don't have one collective mind. We're individuals in the same way that young women are individuals.