To be confused about what the bride wants?

[Despolime]

My friend lives abroad. Another friend and I are two of her bridesmaids. We are travelling to where she's getting married for the wedding in summer. We're staying in a room in the wedding venue Friday - Sunday, which is the time we're abroad. Another 8 guests plus the bride are staying overnight both days too.

Everything was sorted.

Then yesterday, the bride gets in touch to check friend & I definitely want to stay at the venue on the Friday. The wedding is on the Saturday. We said of course. She said that there is no bar or restaurant, only what we take. Fine, we said, we'll pick some things up to take with us. She kept asking if we were sure, and that it's no problem but there's not much about. We double checked again that she'd be there too, and she said yes. She said she was worried we'd be bored if we stayed there.

AIBU to be confused? We're only going to see her get married. Why would we want to stay elsewhere? Am I missing something?

I do think it's a bit odd that the bridge can't sort some kind of food out. Just some fruit and Croissants for the morning and a few bits and bobs for the night before.
That said I also don't believe that it's impossible for OP to sort it for herself. A little annoying? Yes but it's really not impossible.

Bride obviously not bridge!

People wonder why they fall out with friends, well this show why. Reddit have a whole section about people who expect the bride to do things they refuse to sort things they could do themselves.

mummmy, to be fair, how hard it is to provide some food for 3 of your closest people who are staying in the middle of nowhere?

Obviously, its not hard or impossible to buy food themselves, the OP didnt have a problem with it either

it is not an unreasonable expectation to arrive there and have some sandwiches waiting for you
what the bride and her mum are eating?

I dont think anyone commenting on the lack of food thinks they would not cope or it is impossible.....its just really inconsiderate of the bride to not sort this out, thats all

and for all we know, maybe the bride plans to provide sandwiches or something to eat, she just notes that there would be no professional steak-menu prepared :)

@mummmy2017

Being a bride doesn't incapacitate you for weeks before the wedding. It really wouldn't be difficult for you or your mum to pick up a sandwich platter for your guests who have travelled from abroad with great difficulty. Yes of course OP can manage if the bride won't but it would be 100 times easier for the bride to just sort it for them.

Have you asked the bride what her plans are for the Friday evening and what she is doing about food?

If it's just the 2 of you, the bride and her mum (who she doesn't get along with) can you suggest that it'd be lovely to catch up over a supper and a bottle of wine whe you arrive. You can then see if you can find an easy way for rhe bride to provide food. If there's a kitchen, suggest she brings some pizza, salad and a dessert.

As an aside. I cooked dinner fir people staying with me the night before my wedding... and made breakfast 😱😱😂

Hi Despolime
Is there any chance the bride is rethinking staying there herself that night? Because she is close could she cancel her stay and write off that cost if they won't refund but she worries you wouldn't get your money back if you did and would need to book somewhere else or find yourself on your own, no company and no food?

I don't think this has been mentioned yet, apologies if it has. It could be she feels hamstrung in her decision making because one of the party is still staying there.

It's hard to know, as you say, if she won't open up properly.

Also she knows asking you to move for one night would require extra inconvenience...

Did you ever get to the bottom of this? I think
I would assume she feels let down by the other friends and is being a bit 'poor me'. I'd pick up a few bottles of wine and find out if you can cook some pizzas or something yourself, or just grab loads of sarnies, then lay it on thick that the three of you can have a really nice, low key night before the wedding.