To ask how you know you’re finished having children.

[Tunnocks34]

We have three children, our youngest is 6 months. I really assumed that after my third I’d feel like our family was complete etc but I don’t feel like I am. I feel I’d really love another baby (albeit in 2/3 years)

For context, I am 30. Money isn’t an issue and either is age, but what I’m wondering is, is there just a switch that happens. Do you ever think ‘I want no more children’, is it circumstances that stop people?

elbeagle I literally thought the same after dc2 was born, before I even knew if it was a boy or girl 😂

I knew I was done when we had DC2. I just knew

I've got one of each. I'm done! Both are at school now, I couldn't imagine going through the noise and upheaval of another baby. We are very content.

I wanted a 2nd when my 1st was about 18 months. I did contemplate a 3rd but wanted to wait till both were at school. As the time approached I changed my mind quickly due to my age and my husbands (37 and 47 at the time) this put me off a bit but I really just couldn't have started again. The thought of it filled me with utter dread and i realised that whilst I wouldn't change anything about the two I had I would hate to do it again hell would freeze over first!!!!

It's not difficult.

The planet is massively overpopulated. Popping out more children because you feel like it is hugely unreasonable and selfish.

That's how I knew that one was enough.

I've got one ds. He is two and the thought of having another would terrify me. I am definitely done.

I knew I was done when I got pregnant with my third....
Not to say that I don’t want a third but I definitely can’t do a 4th!

Downtown, perhaps you shouldn’t have popped out any children at all if you were that unselfish and reasonable about over population. You can’t possibly guarantee that your single child will be less of a burden on the planet than a family of multiple children. I know families of 3 with single grandchildren and only child families with 4 grandchildren. The maths only works if you decide not to have any children. I also suspect that single man Donald trump is sufficiently more of a burden to the environment than Greta’s entire family. It’s not black and white.dont be so preachy.

I knew I only ever wanted one and then once I had a hideous high risk pregnancy and a non sleeping premie, my thoughts were confirmed!

Love her to death and we have an amazing life. No desire to change it.

DC 3 is 6 months old and I am ecstatic that I am done. I had to convince DH that we should have a third as he wanted two and I had never been broody before. DC1 was an accident and he wanted number 2.

I know I'm done because I see a pregnant woman and I think thank fuck I'll never go through that again. When the youngest finished her newborn phase and became more interesting I was relieved I'd never have to do that again. I'm excited for her to walk, talk etc and see the back of the complete dependency and start out lives as an active family of 5. We were watching a travelling programme recently and I can't wait to get them all old enough to be able to do the big trips. I'm so happy there will be no more restarts.
I can the implant in. But I have told DH that if I were to ever fall pregnant again I would abort. I never ever want to go through pregnancy or Postpartum again.

Down and what if your 1 goes onto have 6,7?
That would be partly your fault. If you want to take the high road on not contributing to the over population the only saintly number is 0.

Two dc, no more due to over population of planet and environmental concerns.

I believe eve in this day and age that people need to stop and think about the state of our Earth. We should not be reproducing more than ourselves.

I have 1 DS who is obviously to me & DP amazing, dp would like another I'm firmly done at 1, I had a terrible birth and DS was taken straight to resuscitation and I lost far too much blood to want to risk it again, it would have to be C section next time anyway but I'm still worried of the risks that come with that also. I'm happy with 1 and so is DP deep down but its taken me a while to feel content and not guilty in my decision.

@TokyoSushi

Exactly the same for me. Phew aye?!

I knew I was done when I lost triplets late in pregnancy. Knew my body couldn’t cope with anymore pregnancies. Also don’t get that broody feeling anymore I see a baby and I’m like “oh god I don’t miss those sleepless nights.” I have two and it’s plenty.

The only thing that kept me going through the awful pregnancy with my second child, was the thought that I would never have to go through another pregnancy!

I knew I was done as soon as my only DS had been born. Everyone said "you'll change your mind when he's a bit older" but nope, he's 6 and a half now and I have no desire for any more.

We have two and I would have liked more but financially we couldn't afford it. I always said my limit for having children was 35. I still didn't give up hope till I was getting on for 37 then I just stopped wanting more.

I have two nieces, I was 35 when the first was born and she made me really broody but by the time her sister was born two years later I wasn't. I guess it was just a switch that went off. I'm really glad now we stuck at two.

I have four and knew immediately I was done having babies after four. I never get broody anymore. Four is enough for anyone my body is knackered!

I also have 4 and knew that was enough. Up until then I kept wanting another. Now if I dream I am pregnant, I am horrified!

I knew I was done during the labour of our first and only. I was petrified, I had a room full of people (12 DH counted), I was pushing through the pain of my epidural making it totally redundant, one rugby-player-sized obstetrician leaning one my right knee up to my hlcgest, midwife on my left knee, forceps, blood loss yo me, heart rate plummeting for DS, shoulder dystocia. Totally fucked my body. I have PTSD and the thought of having another leaves me in a cold sweat.

I'm definitely one of the 'you're pregnant? you poor fucker congratulations!" type people.

DS is now 8yo and I have not once wavered on having another. Neither has he ever asked about a sibling - if he could have one or even why he doesn't have one. We have a lovely calm life, DS has lots of friends, lots of sleepovers, lots of playdates. And a dog who he adores.

I love the bones of my son and don't regret having him for one single minute, but am totally not the maternal type and holding babies does nothing for me.

I wavered for a good few years, but didn’t do anything because I wasn’t sure like I had been with my first two, and then it settled on me that I was done.

I was really thinking a 3rd may have been an option, but DS2 took pay to that, after him I knew no way would I have another couldn’t go through that again.

I would like 3, currently have 2. I just feel that as the kids get older I'd like a nice busy household like mine was with 3 growing up.

Not sure it will happen though, we just get by as it is and I'm counting down to when I can start more hours up at work when the kids get to school, not sure we could afford the extra person. Plus I've got rid of all the baby clothes and stuff because I was convinced we wouldn't have another for years.

Heart says yes, head says no.

I had four, would have kept on going as I love babies and children, but I realised my eldest wasn't getting the attention he deserved, because I was so busy with the younger three, so we didn't have anymore.

I was having a gynae op, so they sterilised me at the same time. I cried all the way down to the theatre.

Definitely the best decision, but it took me a long time to get over it, I would have loved more.