To ask how you know you’re finished having children.

[Tunnocks34]

We have three children, our youngest is 6 months. I really assumed that after my third I’d feel like our family was complete etc but I don’t feel like I am. I feel I’d really love another baby (albeit in 2/3 years)

For context, I am 30. Money isn’t an issue and either is age, but what I’m wondering is, is there just a switch that happens. Do you ever think ‘I want no more children’, is it circumstances that stop people?

I just knew, one of each, could comfortably afford an ok house, a holiday abroad, two cars and money into a pension. Anything more would have put a strain on us, also I was knackered. Yup two was enough.

I only had DC2 to give DC1 a sibling. Two was always going to be the maximum.
My DF has just had twins aged 47. Her first set are 17. Just couldn't imagine...

I realised when I would look at a newborn and think awww cute but thank god I’m not up in the night/doing nappies. Feeling smug I was past the baby stage. Dh got snipped. Youngest of three is nearly 4 years old now.

I felt done after 3 but then I remarried and had number 4. He is the light of my life and the best young chap in the world. I knew I was done when I was 4 months pregnant and went from all-day nausea to being sick all night. Even water made me feel sick. I would have been one and done if he'd been my first.

I have a DS & DD. I knew I was done after an awful second pregnancy, labour, infections pp and would probably have major health issues if had a 3rd. Also that if we had a third our lifestyle would change significantly which I didn’t want.
DH always claimed he wanted 3 dc but after dc2 came along 2 yrs ago he hasn’t mentioned it.

Some days I feel it would be nice to have another, but logically and time and money wise I know that it's sensible to accept that our family is complete, and I don't feel sad about that (as boring as that may be!).

The feeling of being done has come on very slowly for me. I have 3dc and actually got as far as a 4th pregnancy, but had a miscarriage and lost my confidence about having 4. I still thought about having another for quite a while afterwards, but didn’t act on it again - now I know I am done. There was no defined moment when I knew though. Youngest is 8, I’m nearly 40 and have got my career back on track - those things undoubtedly have helped me get past the broodiness - my life has moved on from babies.

I always wanted two kids and I got the perfect pair (to me!). I love the fact my youngest is now walking, talking and toilet trained. The idea of going back to the newborn slog fills me with horror. I still steal the occasional baby cuddle from friends, but it's nice to give them back.

If you hold a baby and don't feel broody ...you are done.

Couldn't afford any more.

I knew our family was complete when we agreed to donate our frosties.

Love my 2 DDs but life is full on even now and I don't know if I'd have the time, energy or money for a third. Note this is just my view other mums clearly feel differently.

I instantly felt done after having our 3rd baby. We already had two boys and then had a girl and it just felt like our family was complete. I am happily giving away our baby things now.

The thought of having another makes my blood run cold!

So yes, definitely done at 2!

After 1st i knew i want another one. After 2nd one having i toyed with the idea of having more but sleepless nights and juggling full time work/home life changed that into a very clear feeling that i’m done. I don’t want to put myself through it again and have no hesitation anymore.

Got an asd diagnosis on dc1. I think dc2 may be on the spectrum. Its not fair on them to have another and disrupt their world.

I knew, when the thought of having another or being pregnant again made me want to cry with fear and panic. I feel like it would break me

Also my hard limit for having babies was 35 and I had my third at 34. 😬

When I had my first, I definitely knew I would want another. I think, after I had my second, I was more ambivalent about a third, didn't know either way.
I didn't really need to make a decision though "it's not the right time, and I don't want one now" was enough.
Since reaching my 40s that has evolved into, "it's still not the right time, I don't want one now, and that basically means no more ever." Which I am 100% ok with.
But I wouldn't have wanted to make that decision for definite at 30.

So for me it has been a gradual evolution/realisation of how things will be, and I've had time to gradually come to terms with it.

In the last year or so, I've realised I definitely positively don't want any more, no way.

My DC3 is 4 months old.
I look at her, and yes I’m sad that she’s going to be my last. It’s bittersweet that all her “firsts” are also “lasts” for me.
The biggest reason we won’t have DC4 is that we couldn’t sensibly afford to. We could afford a 4th baby/toddler for sure....but when it gets to the point where I’ve got 4 teenagers? No. Children get more expensive as they get older!
I also have been feeling quite over-stretched recently in the sense that there aren’t enough hours in the day to give all three of them the individual 1 on 1 time they crave - and that’s a major source of mum guilt for me. That would only be worse if I added another child into the mix.

So I guess my heart isn’t done with having babies, but my sensible brain tells me I have to be done.

I have one and feel done but I know I shouldn’t feel done if that makes any sense!

I should want another, I should want a sibling for my DS, I should want a bigger family and to do it all again but the thought of it is just not appealing to me in any way

Head over heart for me too. I feel sad that I won't be doing it all again and would happily have another, but there are many reasons not to; the main ones being logistics, time and money being spread too thinly and the risks of childbirth. So I remind myself how lucky I am to have the 3 children I set out to have

Grandchildren, I never want to go back to having one of my own from newborn again.

Every time I see a pregnant person I think ‘thank fuck that’s not me’

I have one and I’m done. I’m enjoying all the firsts and watching him grow into a gorgeous little boy. I don’t need to repeat it all with another child though especially with how overcrowded the world already is. We do need to start taking responsibility for our overpopulated planet.

My 2nd birth was just so, so awful and I am still really upset about it but only because I’m terrified of doing it again..

Why I feel like this I don’t know as I could/ should just stop at 2 but I just feel like we’ll be having 3.

Neither of the fuckers slept. Two was enough.