For wanting DH to leave a job he loves for a huge pay rise?

[Pollyspocketrocket]

DH works in the public sector in a senior management role. He works in a specialist field which is very much in demand, particularly in the private sector where the same type of role attracts a much higher salary. DH has been headhunted by a large private company who (following interview) have offered him a significant package including a salary increase of 68%. The employer is offering the same working hours per week, same home working arrangements for part of the week and the same annual leave allocation as DH receives with his current employer. The pension scheme is slightly less favourable but his prospective employer is offering health and life insurance which DH doesn’t currently have with his existing employer.

Since DH has been offered the job he’s now not sure he wants to take it. His argument is that money isn’t everything it’s the great working relationship with all of his colleagues, which makes a big difference to his day. He loves going to work and as an employer they’ve been good - he’s free to work flexibly and doesn’t have to work over his contracted hours or carry any stress with him when he leaves for the day.

AIBU in thinking that no one in their right mind would turn down such a large pay rise? The pay increase alone would enable us to clear our mortgage within the next few years and set ourselves up nicely for our future if we decide to have DC or alternatively, drop down our working hours in later life (I’m late 20s, DH early 30s) AIBU?

Couple of points to talk about

He needs to consider if the things he loves about his current job are guaranteed to continue:

• Will everyone he likes working with definitely stay there?
• Will his boss always be the same?
• Does he see himself staying there until retirement or moving at any point in the future?

Then on the new one:

• Has he met all the people he would be working with?
• Would the hours really be the same or would he be doing more than he would be paid for?
• Are the working arrangements still as flexible?

Then:
Work out the actual net difference per month, per week, per day and see if he feels it's worth it
Work out exactly how much sooner you could be mortgage free and see if he feels it's worth it

Any chance of him taking an unpaid long term career break from his current job, then trying the new one? He then has the option to hand in his notice at either but would be making an informed decision

It has to be his decision, but he should be considering the impact on you both

Haven't RTFT. I can understand why you'd want him to do it, but ultimately it has to be his choice - he's the one who's got to do it.

Also, not sure if anyone else has said this, but some people in the public sector don't want to move to the private sector - not because they lack ambition, but because they are committed to their public service role.

DH is a senior public sector manager. It may be that he has no choice but to work in the private sector in the future, but he is committed to the NHS and would not want to leave it. He has lost members of his team that have been head-hunted to better paid private sector roles and obviously he and his organisation are not in a position to match that. Of course, that's the individual's choice to make and everyone wants to find the right balance for themselves and their family, but for some people there is value in public service which isn't about a lack of drive or ambition and I wondered if that might be part of your DH's thinking too?

His argument is that money isn’t everything it’s the great working relationship with all of his colleagues, which makes a big difference to his day. He loves going to work and as an employer they’ve been good - he’s free to work flexibly and doesn’t have to work over his contracted hours or carry any stress with him when he leaves for the day

That's great & I get his point. Work takes up so much of our lives it's a blessing to be happy in your job.

Respect his wishes. Not everyone defines themselves by money. He's working and in a Senior role doing well. & public sector is quite secure job wise.

I never understand these posts.
He's happy doing what he's doing. If you want a cash cow find someone else.
Or, get a better paid job yourself.