To the lady I arranged a Christmas gift swap with...

[giftponderings]

On the Christmas gift swap thread, I arranged a gift swap on private messenger.

I posted my parcel on the 3rd Jan and was told my parcel would be posted within the next few days. I have not received anything as of yet. I have sent two private messages asking if my parcel had been delivered and that I had proof of postage if they needed it, and could I please have my proof of postage, as I think my parcel may have got lost.

AIBU to wonder if my parcel has not been posted yet?

To the person who I've sent my parcel to, please can you let me know when I can expect my parcel?

Thank you ☺️

Surely if a MNer messaged you for your address, a surprise parcel isn't actually a surprise as you must have discussed why they wanted your address?

Please don't contact anyone on FB, chalk it up to experience

(I think 99% of MNers are actually lovely and have done lots of swaps in the past but the site is different now as it's so much bigger and I don't think I would be giving my details out to strangers...)

I have messaged MumsnetHQ who confirmed the lady hasn't been active since the beginning of January, so perhaps something has happened in her life.

Or more likely she was a scammer.

Do not contact her on Facebook, OP. That is massively out of order and crossing a line.

You took the risk by sharing your details online with someone else in the hope you’d get a parcel. You didn’t, you were scammed. That’s something you have to live with after being so naive and irresponsible.

You should learn a lesson from this: don’t share your details online with strangers, for any reason.

Why would you not think straight away, ohh I've been scammed here"
Are people still so niave??

confirmed the lady hasn't been active since the beginning of January, so perhaps something has happened in her life

Two scenarios.

One, she had "something happening in her life".

Two, she's a scammer who scarpered once her plan succeeded.

What's more likely? Come on OP, it's all very well to want to believe the best of people but you're being really gullible here. This is the reason MN is inundated with "I've got six kids and 20p to last until Easter" posts, because the gullible send money.

Have you learned nothing from the first time.
Now some lovely mn has asked for your address and you have given it to them.
You know nothing about either of these people and you are freely dishing out your address to strangers online. Are you that desperate for free stuff?

So you gave your address to another stranger on the internet on the promise of a nice parcel to cheer you up? I don't wish to appear cynical and I really hope that this is a genuine act of kindness. But... you didn't have a discussion about when you were going on holiday too did you?!

If course you can message her on Facebook!

She scammed you.

I don’t understand why anyone thinks it’s ‘crossing the line’ when she scammed and lied.

Come on guys, it may be niave of OP but seriously, for someone to get so upset about not receiving a gift is an obvious sign of a bigger issue be it anxiety, lonliness, or maybe no one else sends her gifts and it's a big thing for her. There's ways and means of saying stuff without being hurtful.

OP it's lovely a really kind poster has sent you something, hopefully it put a smile on your face and made you realise there are some lovely people out there. Hope it turns up soon and brightens up your day.

@Silenceofthebams

Haha, cross post! Great minds think, erm, suspiciously...?

Just thinking, could you mention what the item was you were expecting? Someone else might be reading who was expecting the same thing and there may be a few of you who were (possibly) scammed...

@JigsawsAreInPieces

Not fair! Some people get all the luck.

Stop being so blooming horrible to the OP! (Some of you) Its me who offered the OP Something from my beauty haul. I had three beauty calendars this year, never again, as I cannot use most of it due to sensitive skin. I had quite a few bits I didn't want. The reason the parcel is a surprise for OP is because I couldn't work out how to send a photo over PM. nothing sinister, I've been a member of MN years and never name change. I've taken part in these swaps before and it's always worked out. Albeit with kids Lego cards! I sent the parcel on Sat 2nd class, I can even add proof of postage pic on this thread for anyone that invested?

Can't we just be nicer on these threads?!

@Freshstart40 here's some for being so lovely

So you gave your address to another stranger on the internet on the promise of a nice parcel to cheer you up?

This ^^. FFS OP if you have children, I sincerely hope you teach them better than this.

And no to the Facebook stalking. Just let it go and stop dishing your address out so strangers can send you things to cheer you up

It’s already been explained why people aren’t “being nicer” on these threads, Freshstart.

Your desire to play Lady Bountiful is cockle-warming, Freshstart, but it doesn't make either dishing out your address to strangers on a site known for being riddled with scammers, OR harassing someone who may or may not be the person who failed to send a gift on a completely separate site, is a good idea.

How very odd. I can't believe that anyone would think that this was a good idea, lesson learned op. Don't be so trusting. Strangers on the internet owe you nothing regardless of your good intentions.

OP, why are you giving your address out to strangers. I can tell you I’m a nice person so you can trust me with your address but MN doesn’t require a criminal check to log-in.
Stop giving your address out!!

I think OP may be quite naive and vulnerable

Or perhaps it is Freshstart who got scammed here.

The point is, no one knows.🤷‍♀️