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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Should I knock his door after 40 years?

258 replies

mrsdaz · 13/01/2020 23:35

Thanks to a popular dna website I’ve just found my father after 40 years. I have his address. AIBU to knock on his door? Or should I send a letter?

OP posts:
partofthepeanutgallery · 18/02/2020 15:38

I don't understand those prioritizing absolute everyone's feelings except the OP's, the child who was literally abandoned by her father, presumably to protect his nice life, and didn't get to grow up with a father because of it.

OP, if you want to knock on his door and get answers, you should do so, so long as you're prepared for all potential outcomes. Your feelings and right to get answers for yourself are just as important for any other children he has.

Fatasfooook · 18/02/2020 15:41

Do it. It’s better to regret something you did than something you didn’t do.

AcrossthePond55 · 18/02/2020 15:51

@mrsdaz

I'm coming at this from the position of an adopted child, but my 'origins' were similar (product of affair). I'll also say that I have never had any interest in meeting my bio parents. They're probably dead now anyway.

BUT, if your main concern is that he may demand/expect some level of care from you simply because he is related to you biologically, I'm stating without reservation you don't owe him any damned such thing. No more than you'd owe some stranger on the street 'care'.

BrendasUmbrella · 18/02/2020 16:03

I have a busy life and no time for an old man that will possibly have some sort of age related illness and need something from me in terms of support.

He may want something from you, but that doesn't mean you have to give it. You could meet him to satisfy your own curiosity and then move on. You know you don't owe him anything. It's really about what you want.

woodchuck99 · 18/02/2020 16:24

I would knock to satisfy my own curiosity. I don't agree with the posters you say you shouldn't cause it "might ruin his life". It's not your fault he had an affair and you were born. I would probably try to find out a bit about his life first though. You can look at things like marriage certificate online. If you find he got divorced about 30 years ago you probably won't need to worry about upsetting as wife for example.

Esspee · 18/02/2020 16:26

“Before it is too late”....that is why it is important to contact him now before he dies or his memory goes.
A simple letter saying that you are mrsdaz, maiden name xxxx. and something like....
I understand that you knew my mother and wondered if you would be willing to meet me as I have some questions you might be able to help me with.
That is vague enough for him to be able to make up a story should anyone else see it.
He may want to meet you. He may ignore the letter. Either way what do you have to loose?

Professionalmum1 · 18/02/2020 16:33

Sorry, but I would turn up. He was man enough to make you, he can handle you turning up after 40 years! So what if his life is ruined, he didn't think of how your or your mothers life might be ruined when he left you both to struggle alone.

You have to prepare for the same rejection you suffered when he left, but why should you sit around wondering for the rest of your life because of his irresponsible actions. I say knock! The fall out is his problem

nokidshere · 18/02/2020 17:41

How callous of everyone advocating for her to contact him without any thought to his family. What's that all about? Just because you think someone has done you harm doesn't mean you should harm their families who are probably just as innocent as the OP.

I would want my mother to tell me the whole story first. Did she want him involved? Did she ask him to leave? Was she having an affair as well? Why hasn't she filled in the details already for you? Why didn't she want you to contact him?

And then contact him via email? Or telephone? Set up an initial meet somewhere neutral so you both have an escape route. You may find his family already know about you, that he wants a relationship or the complete opposite, either way a neutral meeting place will be better for you.

AgathaX · 19/02/2020 17:33

I think you should send him a letter and ask to meet him. It sounds like he would like to meet you anyway. You may spend a very long time regretting it if you don't do it.

Jeeperscreepers69 · 19/02/2020 17:46

Knock. But check out house first and try and catch him alone
.

Wilkie1956mog · 19/02/2020 17:49

Really, leave it alone. Even if you write a letter someone else might open it. If he's old you don' t know what his health/life is like. As someone else said, he could even have dementia. Let sleeping dogs lie. Leave it in the past. I can almost guarantee you'll regret it if you contact him.

TheCherries · 19/02/2020 17:52

Ask yourself how you will feel if he dies and you haven’t had the chance to meet.

It is clear that because he came to see you at birth and 18 that he genuinely is interested in you.

Get counselling and work out the best way to progress with this and also consider how you will manage if happens that it is too late.

Diamondsareforever123 · 19/02/2020 17:53

Know what? I'd leave well alone. God knows what you might unearth, and you may get very hurt. I can understand that you'd like to see him and talk to him...….but ask yourself, has he ever looked for you?

CSIblonde · 19/02/2020 18:00

I'd write. Tho' I rang my Mother's birth mother, I was 19,so ignorance of youth, but I wanted to please her & she was all over the shop so I rang. Her mother had died 6months before. Luckily the family welcomed my Mums getting in touch, but she felt no real bond so contact drifted quickly. Her mother had never tried to find her but had told her DH who she married v late in life. She had no other children.

Teapot13 · 19/02/2020 18:08

I would write a letter. If you don't get a reply, you could consider knocking or phoning.

I really don't understand people advising you to be discreet for his sake! Absolutely protect yourself from hurt feelings, but he was an adult who cheated on his wife/family and made a baby, who has not had to take responsibility for 40 years. Totally not your problem if someone finds out now.

Rachel709 · 19/02/2020 18:11

I would say letter.

plumpynoo · 19/02/2020 18:12

Are you my half sister? This is a really interesting post for me as my father died last year, and it was revealed then by my mother that he had fathered a daughter in the 70s with someone else, but has had no contact with them, although did pay court ordered maintenance. Me and my brother have considered trying to find her but are worried about upsetting her and causing issues for her, so it's nice to hear about from the other side! I would say send a letter, it may be happily received, if not by him maybe other family members. It is a risk, but you haven't anything to really lose, and are under absolutely no obligation to him.

Purpletigers · 19/02/2020 18:12

I’d knock as long as you’re ok with the fact that he may not want to see you . You’re not his dirty secret to keep . His family will just have to accept the situation whether they like it or not .

Localocal · 19/02/2020 18:16

I would say tread carefully but go ahead and tread. My husband found his birthmother in his forties and it was a positive experience for him. Your father may have lost touch with your mother and then realised too late that he wanted to know you. He may be happy to hear from you and welcome knowing you.

I think you have a right to ask him what happened, and why he chose not to be a part of your life. But be prepared -- he may or may not have a satisfying answer. "I was a dickhead and still am" may be the closest approximation of the truth. But "I was a dickhead and I regret it keenly" is a possibility too.

If you are a naturally curious person, and he is in his eighties, you may regret hesitating until it was too late. I would send a letter, give your contact details, and then suggest coming to his house at a certain time on a certain day. If he doesn't want to see you he will at least have to reach out to cancel. And at least your appearance at the door won't come as a shock.

I don't think you need to worry about the feelings of any other family members he may have. Unless he is Rod Stewart, his children will be middle aged and perfectly able to cope with this, and you have no particular responsibility to them anyway. But you could just say in your letter that you are doing your family tree and thought he might be related to you, so that if someone else reads it first it isn't immediately apparent that you are his long-lost child. He will know, of course, but you won't have outed him. That's what the parent-finder who found my husband's birth mother did - she sent a letter just asking if the lady was related to my husband.

Good luck!

garbagegirl · 19/02/2020 18:22

I think you need to put yourself first here OP. You don't owe him or any family he created since abandoning you a damned thing.

Of course you sound like a decent human which is why you asked in the first place!
I would knock, you can never know if he would get the letter but I certainly wouldn't expect anything from this man.

ilovemyskunks · 19/02/2020 18:30

mrs daz are you my half sister lol? My dad had an affair when he was married, I don't know what happened to his lover and her daughter.

Melx42 · 19/02/2020 18:32

I was in the same position but in the end didn’t make any contact. He never tried to find me and could have easily done so as my uncles and aunts live in the same town as him. His loss

81Byerley · 19/02/2020 18:33

Definitely do not just turn up on the doorstep. There are reasons why they advise you should go through an agency which deals with this every day. In your place I would write first.

AdmiralButterfly · 19/02/2020 18:34

Could you send a letter saying you are going to knock on the door in a few weeks if you don’t hear back from him?

ton181 · 19/02/2020 18:41

If he gave his dna, maybe he was hoping you would get in touch. Best to start with a letter. Good luck