Would you want to meet a half-sibling you never knew you had?

[AmyFarrahFowlersTiara]

There is no way to tell the backstory to this without it being horribly outing, so I am going to jump straight to the question:

If you found out you have a half-sibling after the death of a parent you were nc with, would you want to meet your sibling?

Roughly same ages but going by SM, we have nothing in common, very different lives. I really do not see the point in wanting to meet them - AIBU?

No, I wouldn't want to, they are strangers, from what you've said about sm, I wouldn't chose to spend time with them if we met randomly non a pub for example, so why would I make the effort, just because you shared a parent.

Yeah I would meet them.

Just because social media makes it seem like you have nothing in common is no reason to not meet.

Unless there is something in the backstory then I don’t see why not

No. Not at all.

No I wouldn't be interested either but if they were keen I would meet them.

My younger children never met four of their half Siblings as children.

They don't bother with them, as Adults, but do mix with their children.

The Half Siblings and their GM (horrible woman) tried to cause trouble over it, but they've persevered with the relationships.

You can decide for you, but this may come up again in the future, if you have children.

Will you meet at a funeral?

I have a complicated family on my DH's side and I think I'd meet up once and see how it goes.

I would out of curiosity.

Most likely not. I have a half sibling in slightly different circumstances, we dont have anything in common (very different ages, family backgrounds, locations, life stages) and we dont have much contact. So I really can't imagine wanting a relationship with a stranger, just because we happen to share a parent.

Only if the half sibling instigated it.

No I wouldn't, particularly if you already have good relationships with your other siblings.

I have two half-siblings - one I am NC with and one very low contact. I would be quite happy never to have known them, to be perfectly honest - they have bought little but drama and unpleasantness to my family dynamic. My full sister and I have a great relationship and that's enough to me. That does sound terribly cold when written down.

I would probably be curious but I doubt I'd force a relationship. But I can totally understand why someone wouldnt want.

No; YANBU. You don't need to justify your reasons either - this person is a stranger. If you didn't know your shared parent and needed the parent's medical history that would be different. If you go ahead with the meeting, I'd discuss it with your preferred therapist first - or whoever you usually talk to about these things.

I did.
We have nothing in common only our dad.
Meeting as adults was really hard.
I wish we had the chance to meet when we were younger it may have been different

My curiosity would get the better of me, even if didn't actually meet them but just saw them

Yes definitely I'd want to meet them. I'd be nervous and it might be difficult to build a relationship but I'd absolutely want to get to know them.

No i wouldn't.

No I wouldn't be interested, but my father in law met a half sibling he and his other siblings didn't know about when he was in his 40s and they all hit it off.

Different circumstances to you though and a different time.

No I wouldn’t. If you don’t want to meet him then don’t OP. It’s your choice don’t let anyone force you otherwise.

I wouldn't be interested, especially if I didn't get along with our common parent.
If asked, I would meet once so they could say that they'd met me and move on.

I think i would have to give it a go. If it works then you have another brother or sister that you never knew. If it doesn't work well nothing has really changed but at least you gave it a go. It is better than sitting at home thinking "what if".

@Awwlookatmybabyspider And that is what poorly protected facebook profiles are for

Surprised there are so many "nos". People around me seem to think I am crazy, even the ones who grew up with siblings and cannot stand theirs (the irony seems lost on them). It got me wondering whether people just have a strange idealistic Hallmark-movie view on these things.

I don't know if I'd be that bothered for myself but if they wanted to, I'd be OK with that. It'd be a meeting, not an ongoing relationship.

Actually you've just reminded me I do have a half-sibling out there somewhere They don't really feature in my thinking so I tend to forget...

I have a half sister I never knew about (but my dads side of the family did) until she messaged me on Facebook.
I have nothing to do with my dads side of the family and going by dates my half sisters mum would have been pregnant not long after my mum left my dad. She really wanted to meet but I wanted nothing to do with them. We have nothing in common at all.

Saying that, if you are on good terms with that side of the family and think you have things in common then there's no harm in meeting just to see how you get on.

No but I’m not really fond of my family or spending much time with them anyway so this isn’t something I would be bothered for at all.

My Dad moved 200+ miles away 20 years ago and I have only seen him twice over the past nine years so there’s every possibility he has more children and hasn’t told me, I wouldn’t put it past him at all.

I would. Too many questions need answered and I think if I didn't meet I'd always wonder what if

@AmyFarrahFowlersTiara

No. I wouldn't want to know.

If I had gone full-NC with one parent, there would be a very good reason for that, and I wouldn't want anything to do with any half siblings from that NC parent.