To expect a parent to pay for child's damage?!

[MissB83]

Context: I had a friend and her 2 year old for a play date this afternoon. Before either of us could stop her, her 2 year old grabbed my letter flap (inside) and forced it up, which snapped an internal mechanism so it no longer lies flush to the door my friend tried to explain it away that she fiddles with the door and didn't immediately realise that her child had broken it. However the kicker is that the door is brand new; it was replaced about a month ago at a cost of nearly £900! It looks wrong now but worse is letting in a significant draught into an already cold house.

I think the part can probably be replaced as it screws on and on but obviously this will be at a cost. My friend has been back to thank me for the play date but not mentioned the door. I am flat broke so cannot pay for the repair anyway but I don't feel I should have to, but I want to go in on the right foot before annoying my friend. AIBU to expect her to pay?

@BaolFan Thank you - know now about the storm damage etc exclusions but didn't then . And was nearly 10 years ago so no longer affecting us. If I recall though it was a Sainsbury's insurance policy...but may be wrong.

Good grief they only cost 20/30 quid

If it’s too expensive see how much a replacement is in B & Q that DH can fit before causing a fallout.

I'm sure the OP can fix it herself if she wishes to go down that route.

Of course she should pay for it. Yanbu in the slightest.

I also find it weird that a two yr old would be able to snap a mechanism on a letter box flap. Surely they are going to be pretty sturdy to withstand stuff being pushed through on a daily basis?

I would contact the place you got the door from. They might say they'll repair it under warranty. Worth a try. If they charge to fix it, let your friend know. If she wont offer to pay then don't have her child over again.

I’m sorry but if a 2 year old was able to break part of the door I would be contacting the manufacturer and complaining it was not robust enough for £900!! Must be a cheap mechanism if a 2 year old can push it back and break it.

As a general rule, parents should pay for damage done by their DC. In this case, though, your friend may well think that the damage is nothing than a loosened screw (and, in fairness, she may be right). So the reason she hasn't offered to pay may be that she thinks the cost of the repair will be pennies.

Everyone saying that the letterbox shouldn't have broken so easily, any hinge that is pushed beyond it's intended extension can be broken even by a child.

An internal letterbox hinge will be set to open to 90°, possibly a little further to accommodate a large letter/parcel that may need some maneuvering to get out. Push it beyond 180° and it will break.

YANBU to expect your friend to at least offer to pay for the damage when it was their child that broke it.

YABVU. It was an accident I highly doubt she has the money either !
You paid £900 for a front door but can't afford a small part for it

I hate people who don’t offer to pay for things their kids break, why should I be out of pocket because someone’s child broke something of mine. I have one “friend” (she forces herself on you I’d rather not be friends with a child known for breaking things I now make excuses up as to why she can’t come over after her child show how broke the mirror in my downstairs bathroom, he has also broke a few of DDs toys and one lamp, and she just laughs it off!! I would of been mortified if my dd broke you letterbox and apologised profusely and offered to get it fixed/replaced as soon as possible. Yanbu op!

Yes she should pay for it, especially with the door being new. It will make a draught -ours is broken as our door is so old and you can feel it Being brutal but maybe it will teach her to supervise her child better.

if its a new door that cost that amount, and letterbox was part of the door, surely covered by guarantee?

you tube font of all wisdom

House insurance should cover it. I personally wouldnt chase the mother when you invited the child. These things happen.

YANBU at all. Get a quote & have the awkward convo. Good luck. She's pretty shoddy not offering.

I dont know, YANBU in that she should have offered to pay, anyone I know (myself included) would offer to pay for something their child broke. But then I would never accept it either. No it isn't an excuse but children accidentally break things, I would feel different if someone older walked in and ripped my letterbox off, obviously.

Hmmmm. It was an accident by a child. I’m on the fence here.

Who on earth would want to put a lump of cardboard on their door with duct tape? OP this can probably be easily fixed - phone the door company and see if they can help. For those saying If the OP paid £900 for a door she can afford to get it fixed, are you saying that knowing the difference between right and wrong (with regards to her friend) is based on the cost of something? Should the outcome be different then If she paid £500 for the door ? Surely your principles should be the same.

I’d get it fixed, mention the cost when you see her next. If she still doesn’t offer to pay, I would never have her over again. Only see her in public or at her house

I'd ring the door company. It should be under warranty,and if it isn't then I'd make noises about the quality of their products if a 2yr old can break it. Imagine what a burglar with a crowbar could do.

@OlaEliza what burglar goes for the letterbox? Surely a burglar goes for the lock area with a crowbar

Contact the company, it shouldn't do that after a month, even with a two year old pulling it.

Imagine what a burglar with a crowbar could do.

We aren't talking about the door here, just the inside bit of your letterbox which is basically just a draught excluder...

If a £900 door had been installed in my home only weeks earlier and the letterbox broke with only the fiddling of a toddler, I'd be speaking to the company about the quality of their product.

This ^

I would not be impressed with the quality of the product if a 2 yr old, presumably reaching up, can break it in the second before either of you could intervene.