To be annoyed about his comment?

[Teesstar]

So I have been seeing a guy for 9 months, I am going through a divorce with a man who was pretty manipulative and abusive so have had support to deal with having good boundaries etc.

Anyway today in a text conversation he has made a comment about my pubic hair! I am not a wax it girl but I trim my bush, I don’t really like being hairless, and ffs it’s my body to decide! He prefers no hair or at least it very trimmed back back I am not livid with his comment about me having a stray hair and that i use any excuse to have hair down there!

Grrrr! I have put him straight saying it’s my body. I just feel pissed off right now! What are your thoughts? My ex husband never had an issue with this!

it’s the norm now to have no hair there.

1. fuck the norm
2. I'm not convinced. I think Hollywood waxes are about as fashionable as a Victoria's Secret push up bra.

It looks far better though, mines was like a burst couch!

What were the other comments he made?

I would honestly dump him. It won’t get better.

It looks far better

Subjective opinion

mines was like a burst couch

Er.... Maybe see your GP?

No I meant the hair was like a burst couch, not my actual vagina!

No I meant the hair was like a burst couch, not my actual vagina!

Mine isn't though. Some women aren't that hairy.

I know they aren’t and some hair looks nice but mine didn’t so I took it off.

And, even if they are, so what (I'm pretty sure my couch is filled with some sort of foam stuff, so I'm not really sure what you're alluding to)? A woman can to choose to groom or not. Some women prefer to look natural.

I am just saying that in my opinion, which we all have them, is that i see zero wrong in a man wanting his partner to be hair free but the way he went about it wasn’t nice, that’s the issue I think, not that he wants her to have it hair free.

Lots of my friends have shaved there too so in my world it’s the norm, we all have our own normal.

I am hair free completely down there and I totally understand why men don’t like hair, imagine getting hairs in your teeth when giving oral? Yuck
Great, now we've got women criticising other women's bodies

God amazed the Vagina comment wasnt pounced on

I dont shave. I dont
Know if people my age (40) do or not.

But op you said two comments. What was the other about?

Please please please text him saying "I've been thinking about your comment and you're right, I also prefer it if you are completely waxed too so I've booked us both in for the whole lot to be waxed. You're going first!" And then see what he says. Make sure it's clear you're talking back, sack and crack. You don't want a single hair left behind! And it has to be waxed, not shaved. Shaved means uncomfortable stubble in a day or so

i see zero wrong in a man wanting his partner to be hair free

Do you think it's OK for a man to tell his partner how to style the hair on her head, or what clothes she should wear?

Criticising pubic hair is not criticising a body, It’s not like criticising boobs, boobs can’t be shaved off so if someone said that they wanted you to have a boob job coz they thought your tits were too small then thats criticism, not liking a hairy fanny ain’t putting a woman down, it’s saying I don’t like pubic hair, i wouldn’t be offended if a guy wanted me to shave there and I don’t get why anyone would be, it’s what he said that’s offensive.

So many people get criticised over the slightest thing, and I mean me saying that a hairless vagina is better, not what the man said to the op!

The hair on her head isn’t going in his mouth though is it.

Honesty what are you’s like!

i use any excuse to have hair down there!

If that’s his attitude I would respond by growing a full on bush

My DH would probably love me to be bare -tough luck!

Exactly Monstrance, I think MN is too ‘feminist’ for me

Up until now he has always been really respectful, says my body is lovely cause he knows I have poor self esteem

He clearly thinks 9 months is long enough to reel you in before he starts chipping away at your self-esteem in order to manipulate you.

One of the few benefits of living in an age where everyone wants results immediately is that even the abusers don't have the patience to wait around and lock their victims in with a marriage or a pregnancy before showing their true colours any more.

Pubic hair isn’t a body part though!

I am hair free downstairs as is DH. I feel cleaner without hair, especially during my period.

He is BU. Does he remove his pubic hair? If not, he is a hypocrite.

it’s what he said though, ‘any excuse to have hair there’ is an odd statement to make.

So many people get criticised over the slightest thing, and I mean me saying that a hairless vagina is better

I haven't criticised you, I've just disagreed with you. It isn't the same thing.

The hair on her head isn’t going in his mouth though is it.

Pretty sure people managed oral back in the 70s and 80s.
OP has said she already trims anyway, it's not she's asking him to gargle with Cousin It.

Dump. It isn’t the subject matter that’s relevant, it’s the assumption that he should have control of your body/choices and is entitled to criticise and undermine you for things which really don’t matter and aren’t his business.

Not you Tablecloth.