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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you go on holiday without your kids?

193 replies

Popc0rn · 09/01/2020 19:10

Just wondering what other people's thought are on this, would you go on holiday and choose not to take your young (aged less than 10) children with you? Children would be looked after by someone they are very close to.

YABU = No, I wouldn't go on holiday without my children.

YANBU = Yes, I would go on holiday without my children.

OP posts:
Alaimo · 09/01/2020 20:48

My mum used to go on holiday with her siblings once or twice a year. I think she took me a few times when I was very little, but stopped doing do when I started school. Don't see a problem with it at all.

EmeraldShamrock · 09/01/2020 20:50

I wish I could. Sad

PrincessHoneysuckle · 09/01/2020 20:50

@Sparkle567 how is it shitty? You're talking bollocks

Iamclearlyamug · 09/01/2020 20:51

I do regularly, 4 or 5 times a year for a couple of weeks at a time.

I go to visit my partner who is from a non-EU country. Once a year she accompanies me, and the other times she stays with her dad, who she adores and sees regularly

No problem at all for us, in fact this summer her dad will accompany us too, so that he can meet her potential step father

Muddlingalongalone · 09/01/2020 20:52

Hmmmm I did last year over Christmas when they were at their dad's house for the first time. I had an absolute ball so in principle yes - however, it was a crazy expensive holiday and I am feeling guilty at the possibility of doing it again when I could take them somewhere amazing as well.
In summary Yes I would but only if I could comfortably afford it. A long weekend absolutely!

Waxonwaxoff0 · 09/01/2020 20:52

Not for longer than 3 or 4 days. I'm not saying YABU because it's personal choice but I PERSONALLY wouldn't.

DS is 6 though, I might feel more comfortable with it when he's older.

Lipperfromchipper · 09/01/2020 20:52

You see @Sparkle567 that’s all well and good...but...having had several members of my family die young, get sick and or have parents that get sick and so they need to be available I have become a “live to the fullest type of person” I will take time for me, time as a couple and time as a family equally!! It’s all about balance, waiting for them to get older is fine, but when they are older so are you and more than likely not willing or able to travel too much...but as I said that’s just my way of thinking.

Sparkle567 · 09/01/2020 20:52

@PrincessHoneysuckle it’s my opinion on parents that have kids then go off on holiday and leave there kids behind. Not asking you to agree with my opinion.

Sparkle567 · 09/01/2020 20:53

@Lipperfromchipper good for you.

ifeelyoum · 09/01/2020 20:54

Yanbu

notacooldad · 09/01/2020 21:00

I think it’s wrong and shitty to go off on holidays and leave the dc behind. Plenty of time for that when they grow up
I think it would be a bit shitty if they didnt have a holiday but parents did.
I don't feel any guilt. Mine had their skiing holiday, the week in the sun, their wee in france and two weeks in Scotland every year. They were at school while I went away. They are doing the same as me and their dad themselves as adults! History repeating!

PrincessHoneysuckle · 09/01/2020 21:00

@Sparkle567 but it's not shitty if the dc are enjoying time with gp or similar.Nothing wrong with adult alone time at all.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 09/01/2020 21:00

Well aren't you just delightfully judgemental @Sparkle567. A few days holiday away from your DCs is not shitty at all. It gives a parent a chance to refresh, a child a chance to have fun with a relative and lots for u both to talk about when you get back. As long as it is not at the expense of a family holiday it is all good experience.

amusedbush · 09/01/2020 21:03

My parents shipped me off to my granny and grandad’s for three nights when I was about 10 while they went on holiday and it was BRILLIANT. I was allowed to stay up until 11pm when my grandad got home from work, and they had proper brand name Magnums in the freezer Grin

ballroompink · 09/01/2020 21:03

Yes definitely! DH and I had a week away when DS1 was three. He stayed with his grandparents and had a lovely time. DS2 is currently 2 and we are planning a trip away this spring/summer. Again my PILs would look after them. We spend the rest of the time having full on lives, having family days out and never having a decent night's sleep. I feel like we need a break sometimes!

LadyOfTheFlowers · 09/01/2020 21:05

Mine range in age from 9-14 and yes, in 2017 I went on holiday without them abroad while their dad took them camping

yearinyearout · 09/01/2020 21:05

YANBU, we have gone away without the kids several times...we have always take them away at different times thought, so our holiday wasn't at the expense of a family one.

Runmybathforme · 09/01/2020 21:05

Of course. It’s great for your relationship , and your children will have a great time being spoiled by Grandparents or whoever.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 09/01/2020 21:06

shitty thing to do Well aren’t some people full of judgemental shit.

Opinion or not, if your going to post a comment on AIBU, people are going to comment on your posts Confused bizarre concept it seems Grin

Mine go away for 7 weeks each year to stay at their GP, what a shitty thing for me and my husband to do by saying yes to our children’s wishes HmmGrin

Strokethefurrywall · 09/01/2020 21:08

Meh, DH and I have regular trips without our kids, they still get holidays and I genuinely couldn't give a tiny rats arse if someone judges me for it.

I don't know why people keep wanting to justify their parenting decisions, if it works for you and your family then nobody else's opinion or judgement matters.

WendyMoiraAngelaDarling · 09/01/2020 21:09

No. I'm a single parent anyway so used to always being with them. They're great company and I love our holidays together Smile

Echobelly · 09/01/2020 21:09

We've taken a long weekend almost every year without the kids, but we do have parents nearby which makes it easier.

Very much looking forward to DS having his long school trip (10 days) at in 2 years; time, as DD (the oldest) will be old enough to stay with her grandparents or aunts/uncles for a week while we have a proper long holiday!

Sparkle567 · 09/01/2020 21:12

@PrincessHoneysuckle - you don’t need to justify why you think it’s not shitty.

@notacooldad - well they would do the same thing as there parents Did and think it’s ok. You set the example so they think it’s fine and not a crap thing to do.

@sweeneytoddsrazor - we are all judgemental sometimes 🤷🏼‍♀️ Your allowed your opinion and I’m allowed mine. Didn’t realise you had to go on holiday though to have something to talk about with your dc😂 I have plenty of conversations with mine everyday.

joggingon · 09/01/2020 21:14

A weekend yes but I've noticed a few people leave the kids at home for more expensive holidays. I personally find it a bit selfish. Not wrong. Each to his own though.

Sparkle567 · 09/01/2020 21:14

@HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend - comment away 😂 people can disagree which is fine. Doesn’t mean I can’t think it’s shitty parenting