Do people really believe they realised this without the Queen knowing? confused
The palace has confirmed this is the case.
What they've done is released a statement of what they want and presented it as a fait accompli in the hope that will force the Queen to agree to what they want or risk a public falling out, they're trying to strong arm the Queen.
It's a tactic Diana used during her divorce negotiations too. There was controversy around whether Diana would keep her HRH. Diana announced to the press that she had spoken to the Queen and offered to renounce her HRH title but the Queen had refused to accept it and said she could keep it.
None of it was true, and the Queen didn't allow her to be strong armed into anything then. She won't now either.
I really think most of this is down to Harry and not MM at all. If nothing else he should at least have prepared MM better for understanding what the role would be and the constraints they would have to operate in. Harry should know this is not the way to do these things and be dealing with an exit better if that's what they want.
He's been very, very silly and probably destroyed any future role with his family.