to think asking “Are you alright for a drink”? Is not offering someone a drink?

[SproutMuncher]

Last night I went to the pub with 3 friends, one of whom brought her new(ish) partner, so there were 5 of us. I arrived last, and said I was going to the bar and asked if anyone would like a drink, to which they all said yes and I bought the round - fine.

When we finished our drinks, one of my friends did the same - fine.

When my friend’s boyfriend finished his drink, he asked his girlfriend if she wanted a another red wine, then as he got up to go, said to the rest of us “are you guys alright for a drink?”. We all said we were fine but it narked me a bit.

I know it isn’t a massive deal and actually this aside I really liked the guy, but just interested in people’s thoughts. AIBU to think this isn’t really offering to buy us drinks at all?

I agree with yoh also op, that's designed so you say no to a drink. Which you all did. So it worked, if he'd said, what can I get you to drink, my round, you'd all have ordered.

So yes, he took from you all but didn't wish to or couldn't buy back.

Peels an orange in his pocket.

Do you not get out much OP?

Have you never ever heard this phrase before, and heard the reply 'yes I will have a xxx'?

It is perfectly acceptable op.

Truth be told its just another way of offering.

By the same logic would you think 'what can I get you' is presumptious?!

This is so “you’ll of had your tea”. Tight AF

To those who mentioned if our drinks were full, they were nearly empty but had a few sips left if that makes sense

In that case, tight fucking bastard. If I'd have been in your friends shoes Id have been mortified and would just have got up and got the round myself

Yes, offering.

If you want one just say yes. Jesus, talk about being awkward!

See thats how I would ask and if someone wanted a drink they could tell me.

It's how I offer to get a drink - I've never meant anything more than "would you like a drink?" and I'm very happy to get rounds. But in my friendship groups we don't tend to do rounds as such, as everyone drinks at different rates, so whoever's going up to the bar next will simply ask around the table if they're ok for a drink or if they'd like another.

Maybe it's a regional thing but it's pretty normal among those I know.

I disagree- what he says requires you to respond along the lines of “no I’m not alright please get me one” - which makes you look greedy if your glass is not empty - as opposed to “ Can I get you another?” Or “it’s my round what are you having?”- to which you can say yes please or no thanks/ g and t please. I think it’s a sneaky way of getting out of buying a full round. He’s worth the watching

I think this ^

'Are you alright for a drink' round here definitely is an offer to buy you one.

He offered - but not very enthusiastically. And I'm not very impressed by men who drag who their heels about offering, either - he let two women get a round first?

To those who mentioned if our drinks were full, they were nearly empty but had a few sips left if that makes sense

So why didn’t you gesture to your nearly empty glass and say “oh yes, thanks. I’ll have the same again”?

Depends how it’s said imo. But you were there and if it felt like he was trying to get out of buying a round then he probably was.
Recommend you friend LTB (I’d take this as a sign that he’s not serious about her)

Sounds very much like offering to me! What it also sounds like is you are just looking for something to complain about.

This is so “you’ll of had your tea”. Tight AF

^^

Bells on

Can I throw a curve ball in? Is he a Northerner?

gasps

So why didn’t you gesture to your nearly empty glass and say “oh yes, thanks. I’ll have the same again”?

Because (a) he didn't make it easy and (b) they don't know him all that well.

I have had people say that, and my reply would be "yeah, I'll have another whatever it is I'm having."

It's a clumsy way of conversation but I have heard it very regularly and it IS an offer of a drink, if you want one!

Can I throw a curve ball in? Is he a Northerner?

What ARE you implying?

He was hoping not to have to buy a round, but happy to accept drinks from everyone else.

My ex was like this. Not attractive.

Next time just speak up and say what you want.

I disagree- what he says requires you to respond along the lines of “no I’m not alright please get me one” - which makes you look greedy if your glass is not empty - as opposed to “ Can I get you another?” Or “it’s my round what are you having?”- to which you can say yes please or no thanks/ g and t please. I think it’s a sneaky way of getting out of buying a full round. He’s worth the watching

hhhmmm I don't agree, if someone asks "Are you alright for a drink" you can still answer with "Oh I'll have the same again thanks"

I think it’s regional too. Commonly said in the North and is absolutely the same as offering. Not an puce of tightness about it!

I think you’re being precious and looking for reasons to be offended...

I know what you mean op but i have always only ever used it when i was really asking and willing happily to make or buy you a drink. I mean it as would you like a drink? Kind of like saying "you alright?"

It''s totally you'll have had your tea.