CF neighbours

[lcyb]

My neighbours are really starting to piss me off. They're an elderly couple and initially were lovely when we first moved in.

The past week or so though they have been awful. A few incidents have occurred now.

1st - was watching TV in my bedroom. My TV is on a chest of drawers in front of the wall. Neighbour bangs on wall and says "every bloody night that telly". Telly wasn't even on loud at all and I had subtitles on as it was so quiet. I was like but then let it go.

2nd - DS not well. Was crying for a couple of hours but wouldn't settle no matter what I did. Could hear my neighbour shouting about how he wouldn't shut up and they were getting really irate. Don't know what I was supposed to do in that situation?

3rd - was last night. Banging really loudly on the wall at half 11, so much so that it woke my baby up. I was absolutely fuming!

What do I do about this? Do I confront them or will this just give them more reason to kick off/complain about us? I'm really struggling to bite my tongue and feel so anxious in my own house: I'm constantly worried about whether or not my tv is loud, whether DS is being loud etc.

WWYD? AIBU?

Why not write them a conciliatory note saying sorry for the tv noise, you'll be using headphones from now on. A gesture? Follow up with inviting them in for a cuppa and to meet the baby?

Try something different rather than defending your position so much.

It's that quiet that I have subtitles on.

Have you considered getting your hearing tested as they seem to be able to hear it just fine.

This scares me witless as I am thinking about moving - I could never live next door to someone with a TV in their bedroom yet OP seems to think she's entitled to it! Where I live in a row of semi detached houses most people put their wardrobes on the adjoining walls and their lounge TVs on their "hall" side walls. Its common courtesy and sense surely. And if you can't move the TV anywhere else then maybe consider that you don't need to watch TV in bed?

I thought most people had a TV in their bedroom?

I bet the tv speaks are on the rear of your screen and blasting the vibrayions at the party wall.
I'd try headphones.
Look thru the tv menu to see if you can adjust the settings, turn out the bass vs treble settings.
Use an ipad/tablet instead of tv in your room

The random banging the 3rd time is their revenge. To show you how crap it is for people to disturb you when you're trying to sleep.

Get some headphones, be reasonable.

We don’t have a tv in our bedroom. We do occasionally watch Netflix in bed using laptop or tablet.

@Happinessinapeartree Sorry what? No it isn't. I've been on Mumsnet for a while and MNHQ can verify it.

@Funnyface1 It's nasty when they know there's a baby involved.

OP: AIBU?
MN: Yes, YABU
OP: No I’m not

🙄

@BanKittenHeels ?

It’s so unreasonable have a TV on the party wall in the bedroom, I can’t believe you’re trying to defend this! Use headphones or go watch TV downstairs instead. Any neighbour, no matter how old or cranky would be annoyed at hearing next door’s TV whilst they’re trying to sleep. The banging at your baby and randomly the third time is also unreasonable of them but is probably because they’re so frustrated and annoyed at your TV.

I find this shit weird.

I live in a block of flats, downstairs have a newborn baby, cannot hear the baby crying, but yet when I am lying in bed, I can hear their conversations and lets face it what is more loud? (And its only in my bedroom)

@Expressedways My last neighbours never complained

Aaaah another AIBU ... most people "YABU" ... OP "No I'm not!"

Why even ask OP?

*They're an elderly couple
WWYD?

Just wait...with luck they'll be dead soon.*

I once told a colleague something similar when her MIL was being awful again. I told her that with her MILs age and health problems it was best to keep the peace because she would be gone soon. Boy, was I wrong, that woman almost made it to 100!

If you have subtitles on then mute the sound.
If you can't hear it anyway then just mute it !

Why have you bothered asking when you obv think you are right?

YABU re TV, get headphones and stop making excuses.

So what if your last neighbours didn’t complain? It obviously didn’t disturb them (thicker walls maybe) but it is disturbing your current neighbours.

Stop being selfish.

They abu to complain about the baby but you abu about the tv. Better you deal with it than have them repeatedly complain to the agent/landlord.

@Copperleaves
I did for several YEARS everytime it happened. Eventually I stopped because she took him back everytime the police put him out. All the neighbours were sick of them. Eventually they moved.

I think the OP is being given a hard time.

In the first instance rather than BANGING on the wall if they could hear the tv, the ndn should have knocked on the door and had a civilised conversation with OP telling her they could hear it when they were trying to sleep. If the walls are as thin as the semi detached I live in then it’s quite possible the tv really wasn’t on very loud. I can hear my ndn snore, can hear their bed springs, microwave, kitchen fucking doors, floor boards and their tv! The OP hasn’t moved in and had wild party’s every night, she’s been watching a tv she can barely hear so has bloody subtitles on!

Op, I played around with the sound on our tv so that I could hear the voices more than the sound, I also bought a sound bar so that I could turn off the sound omitting from the back of the tv. The sound bar has a night mode and all of the base turned right down.

Thanks @SweetMarmalade, I will look into a sound bar