Don't cling on to him just because he's your first boyfriend, and you don't want to go back to being single.
You've only been together a few months, this is called the honeymoon period, and he should be talking to you like this, not his ex. He should also want to make you happy, so instead of dismissing you when you tell him you're uncomfortable, he should be doing everything in his power to stop doing what it is that makes you feel this way.
Your friend is wrong I'm afraid. Many women put up with bad behaviour from men, thinking that it's normal, because they don't know any better. That's why so many are married to selfish men, and abusers. Your friend can't read between the lines, so all she's seeing is that he has a female friend, and you don't want him to have any friends who are of the opposite sex, which is why she called you controlling.
I'm in my 50s now, and it took a previous marriage, and a LTR, plus various dalliances in between, before I found a good man, who I've been with for 20 years. I can talk to him about any worries I have, and because he loves and cares for me, he listens, and tries to deal with them. He wouldn't dream of dismissing me.
You've got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince, as they say! 
This bloke of yours, is one of the frogs, and if you stay with him, you'll get very hurt. Much easier to throw him back now, before your lives become entangled with living together and kids.
Work on your self esteem. Do the Freedom Programme (google it) to learn what a good relationship looks like, and realise you are worth a good man, but you won't find one while you're tied to this one. You've had a boyfriend now, so it shows you're not some hideous thing who nobody wants, the more you love yourself, the more attractive you will be to other men. Self confidence is like a magnet.
You deserve much better than this.